Our little boy found out about us on Friday and was shown our family book. He took it better than anybody expected. We got to talk to him for over an hour on the phone. He is very talkative and full of questions. Then on Saturday, we ended up getting to spend all day with him and his foster mom. It was wonderful. He went around all day calling us Mom and Dad and and giving us hugs and kisses. It was great. We also got to talk to him Sunday on the phone. I am alittle confused though. He acts one way when he is talking to us on the phone and in person. But then his foster mom is saying he is acting totally different with her when we are not around. For example, he found out that we are suppose to spend the night this coming Saturday and spend Saturday and Sunday with him. He was asking us to stay with him this past Saturday and even to stay in his room. And he even asked me when me and him were together when he was coming to live with us and he wanted to soon. But his foster mom is now saying that he is trashing his room and saying he is not wanting to leave her and live with us. I am already in love with this little boy and I really don't know what to think. I told my husband that I hope he is just not feeding off of her anxiety about him leaving.
As for FM... Why is she not adopting him? Do you think she is having a hard time with the idea of letting him go? If you sense that she's having anxiety about the situation, I would take everything with a grain of salt.
In one sense, I'm sure he is scared and struggling -- no matter how much he wants this, it's still a big unknown future. But she could be exaggerating because she trying to prolong the transition, too. Do you have the sense that she supports the adoption?
It sounds like things are moving forward well, and I'm so happy for all of you. There will always be bumps in the road, but if he is meant to be your son then you can all hold on and get through them. I would really focus on you and your husband's relationship with him and each other, and try not to get too concerned about FM unless things get worse.
children often have a hard time letting go what they know . i would not worry to much he half torn between wanting to be with you and wanting to stay they same.
I agree change in anything can be hard on a child. Any little cange can turn a mole hill into a mountain.
Quoting feralkitten:
children often have a hard time letting go what they know . i would not worry to much he half torn between wanting to be with you and wanting to stay they same.
Always knew
- BettyI
on Aug. 21, 2012 at 10:32 AM