Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Adoptive Moms Adoptive Moms

Hmmm

Posted by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 9:09 PM
  • 10 Replies

Today SO and I went to his cousins to ask her if she would like if we tried to adopt, she rather us adopt to adopt then the baby going to a stranger that she does not know, she thinks we are a good match and wants us to see if we can adopt her. I have a lawyer that I am meeting with Friday to discuss everything.

I hope this all works out!

by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 9:09 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
eoewan
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:28 AM

I would suggest taking your cousin with you. The lawyer can represent both of you. When we were  going to adopt Nye we had our dd come with us. It made it much easier.

VladimirsMama
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:32 AM

Okay thank you I would have not brought her if you would have not said that.

Quoting eoewan:

I would suggest taking your cousin with you. The lawyer can represent both of you. When we were  going to adopt Nye we had our dd come with us. It made it much easier.


eoewan
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:37 AM

Just be aware that nothing will be done until the babe is born. At least the lawyer can start paper work and can tell you what you need to do to be ready once babe is born. We were sent to get a security/welfare check from the police. Once the lawyer received these papers then it was just a matter of giving the lawyer the name, date, and where baby was born. Then we went and signed the papers with our dd.

I think in the states there might be a couple of more steps (your lawyer will tell you) but here in Canada, because it was a kinship/familial adoption, not as much was needed.

VladimirsMama
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:49 AM

Okay and I know nothing can be done til she is born

Quoting eoewan:

Just be aware that nothing will be done until the babe is born. At least the lawyer can start paper work and can tell you what you need to do to be ready once babe is born. We were sent to get a security/welfare check from the police. Once the lawyer received these papers then it was just a matter of giving the lawyer the name, date, and where baby was born. Then we went and signed the papers with our dd.

I think in the states there might be a couple of more steps (your lawyer will tell you) but here in Canada, because it was a kinship/familial adoption, not as much was needed.


Malley
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 5:56 AM
In some states the father can relinquish his rights before the baby is born. I'd suggest doing that if he is not interested in parenting. One less thing to worry about.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
VladimirsMama
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 5:57 AM

Yes I know, we are taking both of them to the lawyer with us

Quoting Malley:

In some states the father can relinquish his rights before the baby is born. I'd suggest doing that if he is not interested in parenting. One less thing to worry about.


SarahSuzyQ
by Sarah on Jan. 17, 2013 at 7:45 AM
You will still have to have some kind of home study and background checks, even though it is family. I'm sure the lawyer will help you walk through the process.

Be prepared, too, that your cousin can't fully decide for adoption until the baby is born. She may feel differently when she's holding him/her in her arms, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. If a mom can parent her child safely, that's really the best scenario for any kid. If that's not possible, then having the child stay with his/her biological family is usually for the best... Which is what you're planning for this LO, such a good thing.

Good luck, please let us know how things are going as you continue the process!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
VladimirsMama
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 8:30 AM

I know she could change her mind and I am actually ready for her to farther along, but I wold hope she would do what she felt was best weather I adopt the baby or she keeps her.

Thank you and I will be sure too!

Quoting SarahSuzyQ:

You will still have to have some kind of home study and background checks, even though it is family. I'm sure the lawyer will help you walk through the process.

Be prepared, too, that your cousin can't fully decide for adoption until the baby is born. She may feel differently when she's holding him/her in her arms, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. If a mom can parent her child safely, that's really the best scenario for any kid. If that's not possible, then having the child stay with his/her biological family is usually for the best... Which is what you're planning for this LO, such a good thing.

Good luck, please let us know how things are going as you continue the process!


aprilz1225
by Silver Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:39 AM

 ask about pre and post adoption counseling for the both of them. required.

VladimirsMama
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 9:55 AM

I will 

Quoting aprilz1225:

 ask about pre and post adoption counseling for the both of them. required.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)