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name at least one thing you can say..

Posted by on Nov. 8, 2014 at 5:27 AM
  • 10 Replies
Your grateful for your birth mom or adoptive mom saying/doing for you? Or anything that is maybe rare a gift u may have gotten. ....and not for raising/giving you a child. That's everybody #1 on the list I'm sure!!
by on Nov. 8, 2014 at 5:27 AM
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Replies (1-10):
momtomiles
by on Nov. 9, 2014 at 11:57 PM
I am grateful for everything our birth mother did, I couldn't pick just one:)
doodlebopfan
by Bronze Member on Nov. 10, 2014 at 1:54 AM
1 mom liked this

I am thankful that she allowed me to take pictures of her and our son together so that he will always be able to see her, even when she isn't near.

With our second son, she provided a newborn picture of him and her together. So thankful for that. :)

jen1130
by on Dec. 5, 2014 at 12:07 PM
My situation is a bit different....our kids came by way of foster care.
Our first daughter was 2 days old when I met her and dressed her to come home with us. No birth mom in sight. Just a baby girl with no name and about to hit drug with drawls. Lots of medical issues and sleepless nights. At 6 weeks birth mom went to CPS to give our baby girl a name ( when I say ours I mean hers mine and my husbands ) for 6 weeks we had been calling her Savanna..I always loved the name. The worker called me and said Jennifer she is here if you want to meet her get up here this may be your only chance.....talk about a crazy mad dash....to meet my daughters mother. I get there and I could have dropped the baby when they told me what she named her....Savanara (Saw-vah-nar-a). a Cambodian name ) her birth mom was beautiful and had a dimples. My daughter looks like her and even almost 14 yrs later sounds like her. I was incredibly blessed she allowed me to take pictures. Then she was gone until Vanna was 6 months old. Jail got hold of her and she wanted visits....so Vanna and I went to jail 2x's a week I always dressed her cute and allowed as much contact as birth mom and Vanna would be comfortable with. Then Vanna got sick...birth mom begged me to please visit her even with out Vanna. So I did. I am very great full that I got the chance to know her as more then a gang member who took drugs while pregnant with my daughter...the baby girl I was told at 6 weeks had CP and at 6 months I was told she fail every little hearing test 100%...I was told she would be a slow learner....even with all that. I loved her birth mom. I begged the warden to please allow me to bring a video camera....so some day my daughter could see and hear her birth mom. With enough begging it happened!!!! I got it.


I got to know her and was able to understand her...I love her. That I can share with our daughter...who is perfect in every way. She doesn't have CP she just had a long battle of the drugs..She hears everything...believe me!!! She does work very hard for every A& B but that's what she gets....she is also popular with her friends and teachers and is first string on the girls basket ball...I have so much to be great full for....I could never pick just 1 thing.

No matter where our kids came from with out birth mothers some of us would not have any children and others would not have all their children.

I have 3 more adopted kids...as well as 3 bio sons...


During court her birth mom's attorney tried to talk her in to fighting for Vanna...she said no Jennifer is keeping her. I could hear it in court.
raleyfamily
by on Dec. 5, 2014 at 3:29 PM

Mine are adopted from foster care.  I don't know that I am grateful to birthmom for anything except maybe the one so addiced to drugs for not terminating the pregnancies.  We are in a lot of contact with the extended family of this one, and the grandparents have supported me in every way they possibly can.  My husband died in October, and they and an aunt have contributed finanacially as well as emotionally.  Birthfather of these two on the other hand is very verbal in his support of me.  I know a lot of people he goes to church with, and he will tell them: 'These are CARLA's children!"  In court at the termination hearing for my son, they brought him in chains because he was in prison, and when the judge asked him if he understood what he was doing in signing the termination papers, and he said, "Judge, I don't think right.  But Mrs. Raley DOES think right, and I know she will take good care of my son."  It brought other spectators to tears!

The other birthmom, well...she is so messed up, let the children be sexually abused while she tried to hang onto boyfriends, let them abuse them physically, too, gave them up in order to keep the boyfriends.  Maybe someday I will be able to sit down with her and she can let me know what in the world she was thinking...she was abused herself as a child to all throughout her life, and so the cycle continued.  I would love to raise up such wonderful children that maybe someday they will make a difference in HER life!

Carla Raley, wife of Bill, mom of 12, foster mom of more than 50
Visit my blogs for stories of the life of an older mom raising a large family, foster/adoption and homeschooling
http://raleyfamilysfarm.blogspot.com/

http://bookreviewsbycarla.blogspot.com/



teaguen
by teaguen on Dec. 6, 2014 at 10:40 AM

 I am grateful every day that my safe surrender babies mothers made the best decision to make sure they delivered them to a hospital and did not abandon them. I hope one day that we may find out who they are so the girls will know these wonderful birth moms who made the right choice for them.

hopalong47
by on Dec. 7, 2014 at 2:37 PM

This past Thanksgiving, our (adopted) son came home from New York for a visit. His birth mother drove four hours (each way) to see him and to (finally) meet us. We have so much to be thankful for....

Our son is 39...he met his birth father soon after he graduated from high school. He met his birth mother 5-6 years later. We had met the birth father, and I had spoken on the phone to the birth mother, but this was our first face-to-face meeting.

Ours was a closed adoption, through an agency...that is how things were done back in the seventies.

confused969
by on Dec. 7, 2014 at 6:57 PM

 Carla-I dont mean to hijack this post but did you just say your husband died in October?  I am so very sorry to hear this, I had no idea.  I know you have a very large family including several grown children and I know that must be a comfort and hopefully a help to you.   Your faith and hopefully your church community is helping you at this difficult time and will continue to be a source of comfort.  I think of you often and was going to send a pm but things have been so busy and chaotic in my life it did not happen yet.  I wish I was closer to where you live.  Please accept my sincere condolences.

To the OP-I guess I am not sure what to say about my birthmom since I never knew her or met her.  I did search and found her but she did not want to speak to me. 

Quoting raleyfamily:

Mine are adopted from foster care.  I don't know that I am grateful to birthmom for anything except maybe the one so addiced to drugs for not terminating the pregnancies.  We are in a lot of contact with the extended family of this one, and the grandparents have supported me in every way they possibly can.  My husband died in October, and they and an aunt have contributed finanacially as well as emotionally.  Birthfather of these two on the other hand is very verbal in his support of me.  I know a lot of people he goes to church with, and he will tell them: 'These are CARLA's children!"  In court at the termination hearing for my son, they brought him in chains because he was in prison, and when the judge asked him if he understood what he was doing in signing the termination papers, and he said, "Judge, I don't think right.  But Mrs. Raley DOES think right, and I know she will take good care of my son."  It brought other spectators to tears!

The other birthmom, well...she is so messed up, let the children be sexually abused while she tried to hang onto boyfriends, let them abuse them physically, too, gave them up in order to keep the boyfriends.  Maybe someday I will be able to sit down with her and she can let me know what in the world she was thinking...she was abused herself as a child to all throughout her life, and so the cycle continued.  I would love to raise up such wonderful children that maybe someday they will make a difference in HER life!

 

raleyfamily
by on Dec. 7, 2014 at 9:29 PM

He died October 15.  My daughter and I found him dead of what seems to have been a heart attack at our lakehouse.

It's been incredibly hard.  I will try and do an update on your adoptee group very soon.

My church and family have been wonderful.  We would not have made it through last month financially if it weren't for donations that kept coming in the mail. Thankfully SS kicked in this month.

Quoting confused969:

 Carla-I dont mean to hijack this post but did you just say your husband died in October?  I am so very sorry to hear this, I had no idea.  I know you have a very large family including several grown children and I know that must be a comfort and hopefully a help to you.   Your faith and hopefully your church community is helping you at this difficult time and will continue to be a source of comfort.  I think of you often and was going to send a pm but things have been so busy and chaotic in my life it did not happen yet.  I wish I was closer to where you live.  Please accept my sincere condolences.

To the OP-I guess I am not sure what to say about my birthmom since I never knew her or met her.  I did search and found her but she did not want to speak to me. 

Quoting raleyfamily:

Mine are adopted from foster care.  I don't know that I am grateful to birthmom for anything except maybe the one so addiced to drugs for not terminating the pregnancies.  We are in a lot of contact with the extended family of this one, and the grandparents have supported me in every way they possibly can.  My husband died in October, and they and an aunt have contributed finanacially as well as emotionally.  Birthfather of these two on the other hand is very verbal in his support of me.  I know a lot of people he goes to church with, and he will tell them: 'These are CARLA's children!"  In court at the termination hearing for my son, they brought him in chains because he was in prison, and when the judge asked him if he understood what he was doing in signing the termination papers, and he said, "Judge, I don't think right.  But Mrs. Raley DOES think right, and I know she will take good care of my son."  It brought other spectators to tears!

The other birthmom, well...she is so messed up, let the children be sexually abused while she tried to hang onto boyfriends, let them abuse them physically, too, gave them up in order to keep the boyfriends.  Maybe someday I will be able to sit down with her and she can let me know what in the world she was thinking...she was abused herself as a child to all throughout her life, and so the cycle continued.  I would love to raise up such wonderful children that maybe someday they will make a difference in HER life!

 


Carla Raley, wife of Bill, mom of 12, foster mom of more than 50
Visit my blogs for stories of the life of an older mom raising a large family, foster/adoption and homeschooling
http://raleyfamilysfarm.blogspot.com/

http://bookreviewsbycarla.blogspot.com/



fionnula
by on Dec. 9, 2014 at 5:41 PM

I am thankful to Meghan for wanting to stay in his life.  He is almost 3 now.  She is coming this week to see him in his little class he has once a week, and we are getting together with she and her mom this weekend for Christmas.  I am thankful for the gifts she gives him and I have saved them all. I am thankful to her for her love of all of us :)

Maggiesfarm
by on Dec. 10, 2014 at 4:45 PM

I'm thankful for my daughter's birth parents and the very difficult decision they made.

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