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What do you do when you really don't like sex?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I really do not like sex. Never has. It's always been more of a burden than an enjoyable experience. My DH's sex drive has not decreased at all in the 16 years we've been together but mine sure has. It went from being a low sex drive to no sex drive and now to a "please, don't even try to touch me" sex drive.

I've tried to "have sex even when you don't want it" routine and that just led to me resenting him and caused a lot of problems.

No insurance so the doctor is out. I have an iud, the one without the hormones because the hormones in bc pills just made me mean and dropped my already non-existant sex drive even farther down the tubes.

Sleep would be great but the 9 month old baby has been keeping me up half the night. And even when I was getting good sleep, I still hated sex.

Counselors, therapists, doctors, etc all cost money we don't have right now.

I'm so tired of disappointing him but I really hate sex.

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 5, 2012 at 1:57 AM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:09 AM
Do you find yourself aroused by the thought of other men??? Maybe you just aren't attracted to dh???? Look into clinics. I hope they can help you. You're too young to feel like this.


Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you have a free clinic where you could possibly be seen? How old are you? I get in my moods. But they don't last long. You need help momma. Are you attracted to your dh after all these years?

Don't know. I haven't looked. I don't talk about sex except here and only anon. I'm 36. Sexually attracted? I never was sexually attracted. Attracted? Yes, but in a more analytical/intellectual way.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:12 AM


Quoting jynkx:

that dosent sound fun :(    have you suffereed any abuse?  i saw your reply that you dont have medical for help, but have you looked into any free help in your area for womens sexual dysfunction?   dont feel bad about how you feel, its not uncommon.  but i do believe there is help.  sex is something that should be enjoyed by both parties.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting jynkx:

ok, so does it hurt when your hubbs fills you?  or is it a mental unenjoyment?

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting jynkx:

are you feeling "uptight" about anything that you are aware of?  i dont mean that in a "bad" way, but it should be at least somewhat enjoyable.  even if you arent reaching orgasm.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting jynkx:

what specifically is it that you do not like about sex?

Everything. I don't like the feel, the smell, the sounds. Sex just doesn't feel good to me.


No, it's not even enjoyable. Just normal stresses, you know, life.


it doesn't hurt. It doesn't anything. Really, I feel nothing down there, nothing that could be described as pleasurable or painful anyway. I mean, I feel him but that's it. Does that make sense?

Enjoyment, mental unenjoyment? I don't know. It's like numb. Except for when I'm tired then all I feel is "hurry up." lol


No abuse. I don't know why I've felt this way. I haven't looked into anything for help because I don't even know where to start for free help. It's never bothered me before so I've never worried about it. I'm not really worried about it now. You know, I've never really liked it so I'm not missing anything. It's kind of been getting to my DH lately though. Only because he's been wanting it more and I've been too ___ to do it (tired, exhausted, moody). Add in that the iud seems to be messing up my system (I keep bleeding for no reason at unexpected times) and we just don't seem to have sex anymore.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:14 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you find yourself aroused by the thought of other men??? Maybe you just aren't attracted to dh???? Look into clinics. I hope they can help you. You're too young to feel like this.


Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you have a free clinic where you could possibly be seen? How old are you? I get in my moods. But they don't last long. You need help momma. Are you attracted to your dh after all these years?

Don't know. I haven't looked. I don't talk about sex except here and only anon. I'm 36. Sexually attracted? I never was sexually attracted. Attracted? Yes, but in a more analytical/intellectual way.


No, I've never been attracted or aroused by men. Weird, I know. My friends thought I was strange too.

Attracted or not, I love my DH, with all my heart. I'm thankfully he's been so understanding about my lack of desire.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:16 AM
Women????


Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you find yourself aroused by the thought of other men??? Maybe you just aren't attracted to dh???? Look into clinics. I hope they can help you. You're too young to feel like this.





Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you have a free clinic where you could possibly be seen? How old are you? I get in my moods. But they don't last long. You need help momma. Are you attracted to your dh after all these years?

Don't know. I haven't looked. I don't talk about sex except here and only anon. I'm 36. Sexually attracted? I never was sexually attracted. Attracted? Yes, but in a more analytical/intellectual way.



No, I've never been attracted or aroused by men. Weird, I know. My friends thought I was strange too.

Attracted or not, I love my DH, with all my heart. I'm thankfully he's been so understanding about my lack of desire.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:21 AM
You don't want to seek advice from professionals and all you do here is say how much you dislike everything about sex. How do you expect this group to help you?
Karla1948
by on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:27 AM

Eleanor Roosevelt did say, "women must learn to endure sex". 

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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:37 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

Women????


Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you find yourself aroused by the thought of other men??? Maybe you just aren't attracted to dh???? Look into clinics. I hope they can help you. You're too young to feel like this.





Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you have a free clinic where you could possibly be seen? How old are you? I get in my moods. But they don't last long. You need help momma. Are you attracted to your dh after all these years?

Don't know. I haven't looked. I don't talk about sex except here and only anon. I'm 36. Sexually attracted? I never was sexually attracted. Attracted? Yes, but in a more analytical/intellectual way.



No, I've never been attracted or aroused by men. Weird, I know. My friends thought I was strange too.

Attracted or not, I love my DH, with all my heart. I'm thankfully he's been so understanding about my lack of desire.


um no! lol I'm not gay or bi. I'm not attracted to anyone sexually.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:38 AM


Quoting Karla1948:

Eleanor Roosevelt did say, "women must learn to endure sex". 

This woman has endured plenty. I think my man needs to "learn to endure without" for awhile. lol

Karla1948
by on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:41 AM


Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Karla1948:

Eleanor Roosevelt did say, "women must learn to endure sex". 

This woman has endured plenty. I think my man needs to "learn to endure without" for awhile. lol

Mine's no longer around, but when he was, if I denied him sex, I could eventually make him do anything!

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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Oct. 5, 2012 at 4:50 AM


Quoting Karla1948:


Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Karla1948:

Eleanor Roosevelt did say, "women must learn to endure sex". 

This woman has endured plenty. I think my man needs to "learn to endure without" for awhile. lol

Mine's no longer around, but when he was, if I denied him sex, I could eventually make him do anything!

A nap would be nice... or if he would fold the mountain of laundry... oh, the possibilities are endless. lol

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