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Need some advice...please

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 4 Replies

Well, here's the deal- I moved in with my fiance a few months ago.  We're getting married June 1 this year. 

On July 4th last year, his sister needed some help- she was having relationship problems and needed to move out of the house she shared with her boyfriend.  So, she moved in with my fiance.  Which was just fine.  I have no problem helping somene when they need it.  But now it's been several months, and I'd like do get some wedding planning done, and actually have some quality time with my soon to be husband- oh yeah- he's afraid to do anything intimate for fear of his sister "hearing" us.  Well, we used to be able to have fun, freedom to do what we wanted in the house and all that stuff.

But I'm frustrated!  Not only do we have to be careful of what we do and when, and always worry about someone "cathching us", it's like she expects me to be her maid too.  I'd really like her to find her own place- rather than just basically "using" us at this point.  I mean- really- I guess I can't blame her for no wanting to move- she basically lives here for free, doesn't have to do anything, parties all the time.  I shouldn't feel this way perhaps, but I do.  So how do I tell my fiance that she really needs to find her own place.  I need my privacy and I need my "alone" time with my fiance.  Sometimes I'm tempted to just move back to my own house where I don't have to worry about making sure i'm fully dressed when I walk out to the kitchen in the morning to get a cup of coffee! 

I just think that after 7 months, that should have been enough time to save some money and find her own place.  But instead, she parties all the time and has no reason to really be motivated to get her own place.  How do I tell my fiance I can't do this anymore???

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:57 AM
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Replies (1-4):
Roe1993
by Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 12:02 PM

I'd just sit him down and explain to him that you need time with HIM and with her still being there, it's making it hard, and that you really think maybe it's time she gets her own place, especially since she's been there for 7 months already. Just tell him you feel like you guys can't really be yourselves with her there. He should listen.

aprilsalcro
by Bronze Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 12:17 PM
I would flat out tell him she needs to move out. Talk to her offer help to help her find a new place. Does she help with any bills ? As for the sex tell him have you told him how you feel ?
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TheLadyAmalthea
by Silver Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 1:26 PM

She's an adult I'm assuming. I could understand a few months to get her life in order, but now she is over doing it. Sit and have a talk with her. Ask her what is going on, how she is doing... Don't come off as being annoyed with her, because that will make it worse. Ask her if she needs help finding a place. 

la_bella_vita
by Bella on Jan. 31, 2013 at 5:57 PM

 I would explain to him how you feel. Good luck

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