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Favorites

Posted by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 10:49 AM
  • 7 Replies

 I really try not to play favorites but I feel closer to my youngest son than I do my oldest. I think it may be because when I had my oldest I was young and wasn't there much when he was little(which I regret to this day) so I missed a lot with him. With my youngest I was always there so I guess we bonded more. I try not to show it but I know I do sometimes.

by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 10:49 AM
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Replies (1-7):
twinkletoes83
by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 10:55 AM
Ya know, I kinda feel like that to with my oldest, except I was there with her, I just had severe PPD and my DH was deployed so I was even more depressed. I don't play favorites, but since I know I feel closer to my younger 2 kids I go out of my way to do special things with my oldest. Its a good start if you know!
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Vibrant.Heart
by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 10:57 AM

I have favorite things about each of my kids.  Jayson's my cuddly baby.  Thomas is my independent thinker.  He's my big boy.  So sometimes, yes, I do favor each of them.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Oct. 30, 2011 at 12:34 PM

I only have one child so far and she will always be my favorite

xavierlogan09
by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 12:43 PM

I feel sorry for kids whose parents have favorites. My mother did that with us. She had three daughters and then a son. So always only wanted one boy. So naturally my brother was her favorite. We noticed and it hurt a lot. Most of my siblings don't talk to my mother because of how she treated us. What I can't understand is how can a mother like or love one child more than the other?

allhalls
by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 2:48 PM

 I thought I explained this in my post but I guess not. First I never said I love one more than the other. I said I felt more of a BOND with my youngest, not that I loved him more. And to repeat why, When I had my oldest I was young and not around very much for the first year of his life. After having my second I know everything I missed with my oldest and think thats why I have a stronger bond with the youngest. I regret that and was very lucky that I had my parents there to help me and that he was too young to remember. I spend alone time with each of my boys every day and do my best not to show one more attetion than the other.

Quoting xavierlogan09:

I feel sorry for kids whose parents have favorites. My mother did that with us. She had three daughters and then a son. So always only wanted one boy. So naturally my brother was her favorite. We noticed and it hurt a lot. Most of my siblings don't talk to my mother because of how she treated us. What I can't understand is how can a mother like or love one child more than the other?

 

xavierlogan09
by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 3:10 PM

I'm not saying you love one child more than the other but some mothers do. I just don't understand how they can love one child more than another one. I have know moms who love the more well behaved child more. But just because a kid misbehaves isn't a reason to love them less. 

Quoting allhalls:

 I thought I explained this in my post but I guess not. First I never said I love one more than the other. I said I felt more of a BOND with my youngest, not that I loved him more. And to repeat why, When I had my oldest I was young and not around very much for the first year of his life. After having my second I know everything I missed with my oldest and think thats why I have a stronger bond with the youngest. I regret that and was very lucky that I had my parents there to help me and that he was too young to remember. I spend alone time with each of my boys every day and do my best not to show one more attetion than the other.

Quoting xavierlogan09:

I feel sorry for kids whose parents have favorites. My mother did that with us. She had three daughters and then a son. So always only wanted one boy. So naturally my brother was her favorite. We noticed and it hurt a lot. Most of my siblings don't talk to my mother because of how she treated us. What I can't understand is how can a mother like or love one child more than the other?

 


ickybanana
by on Oct. 30, 2011 at 3:13 PM

I have one child, but when I do decide to have #2 I don't want them to think that I favor one over the other. I understand where your coming from. My mom was 15 when she had my sis and I, and barely did anything with me. She left everything up to my grandmother who was more like a mom than my real mom ever was, and took better care of my sister (the older twin). She took my sister with her when she turned 17 to go live with a boyfriend. Then I started living with her when I was 6, and was treated like a lesser person than my sister.  I am not saying you neglect one child for the other, or treat one better. Thats just my experience with it. I am sure you love them both equally. You just had your oldest at a time where the bond was not as strong. You also were not around your oldest as much so it feels like you don't know them as well as your youngest. Sorry if I mis-interpreted your post, but think I understood it pretty well. There are different ways a person could see your post, but I understand both views and think your not the type to treat one child better than the other just because of time spent with them.

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