That is what he gets
- 21 Replies
Ive stuck by my dh who has spent years trying to make me feel worthless and he bounces back and forth between being an ok husband and a bad one who says mean things to me. I dont know what to call it but its been this way for years. When he gets that way I call it his selfish mode and when he is in selfish mode he always brings up wanting to leave me and how life with me is so sucky.
He spent all day yesterday telling me how horrible of a wife I am listing reasons why he does not want me anymore, and listing reasons why single life would be sooo much better. All reasons were completely selfish and just disgusted me. He gets like this. He has did this several times before and then he will go back and get his head out of his butt then try to say he did not mean those things and he does not want me to leave then I usually forgive him. This attitude he gets is not because of a fight or anything either. He just gets like this, and will just get meaner and meaner to me.
When he was saying all this to me I said "You are just saying those things right now because you are going through your little selfish mode, and I know later on once I make you leave you will try to come back to me and say you did not mean it."
He LAUGHED in my face and said "Why would I come crawling back to you?" Then he started berating me about how he did not want me anymore and rubbing how great being single would be in my face. I felt like scum of the earth by the time he was done insulting everything about me and being married to me. I have honestly been good to him. I have only loved this man. I have not been perfect but I have never tried to hurt him and he knows this. He has admitted that he knows I don't deserve this.
Needless to say by the time he was done with me I knew there was no way in hell I was taking his ass back. I decided that if this man was willing to throw his wife and marriage away over some temporary (yet reoccurring) desire to be single then I don't need him anyway.
I told him he needs to move out and an hour later before he has even left he is already in here trying to take back what he said and saying he does not want to leave. Ha! F*** that! Im not going to keep letting him do this same thing to me again and again.
I know I will miss him and I will feel lonely. Its going to be hard but it couldnt be as bad as staying with him while he makes me feel worthless.....
I just had to get this all out
Do you agree that I am justified in ending it with him? I am so tired of being hurt. Everything I have described is something that happens repeatedly and has been happening for years. It is not a one time thing.
oh this is going to be one of those 'what comes around' kind of things..............
IF you dont end up taking him back this is my prediction
Youre going to get a taste of what life is like when youre NOT belittled all the time, youre going to become a stronger individual, your confidence in yourself and your abilities to be just fine on your own are going to skyrocket. As this happens he will become both jealous of you and realize what a moron he was. At the same time you will feel better and better about life and within a short time you will look at that man completely differently. You'll actually see the small, insecure man he REALLY IS.
The good things that will come from him...
Your kid/s.
Your confidence.
The absolute appreciation you will have when you meet a man who treats you like a real man treats a woman....
Good luck and congrats ;)
Take the high road. Its a hard road to take, but once your past all the emotions and keep him away (no texting, phone calls, talks or seeing him) you will feel like wonder woman. I'm speaking from experience :) don't let him weasel his way back in, don't let him talk you out of this.. Cut all ties! (Unless you have children) and let him wallow in his own verbal abuse for awhile. You deserve to feel amazing! So IF you decide to go through with this your making the best choice in the world.
Smart phones & kids
