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i know im being an idiot..

Posted by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:19 PM
  • 11 Replies
After everything that's been happening in my marriage. I still want to make it work but his anger scares me. And I don't want that around my kids. But I believe he can be the best dh if only we can work past his anger, and the things he says out of anger. He can't resolve anything w/o yelling. And if he can't yell he says things that he knows isn't true just to. TRY to get me to argue with him. And gets angrier cause it doesn't work. I'm confused. Apart of me is ready to walk away, but I know he can do better.
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by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:19 PM
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Replies (1-10):
debbie26
by Debbie on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:28 PM
1 mom liked this

You say you know he can do better

Hunny YOU can do better....................

He needs to do better and keep his anger away from the kids has he tried talking to anyone to help or walkaway is something he needs to do

kw.2
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:29 PM
I think it's great that you are trying to work it out! Good luck (:
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debbie26
by Debbie on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:30 PM

BUT i wish you luck IF you choose to stay with him and work on things 


auroragold
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:33 PM

How long have you been TRYING to make it work?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:36 PM

I don't think you're being an idiot. I think you're desperately in love with someone who has a problem and you want them to be okay, you want your love to flourish, and you're afraid of a future without that person because you're so attached by the heart.

Has at all considered talking to someone? Seeking help from a professional? I know how that can sound like an unfeeling, cruel sentence, but sometimes a therapist can work wonders with an underlying reason for anger that we, ourselves, aren't even aware we're holding on to.

I think, though, that if he refuses to see that there is a problem and refuses to make an effort to help himself to help you, and mutually your marriage, that there is a deeper issue and one you shouldn't try to approach for your own safety. Go with your gut and walk away... I'm not at all trying to scare you or tell you to cut your losses. It just breaks my heart when people go through hard times and anger is the key to breaking everything apart and kids should definitely not be subjected to bursts of inexplicable rage.

Jennifer_57
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:37 PM
My bf had anger issues..he has gotten better. I think what makes the diff is my bf knew he had those
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dmarie2101
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:40 PM

since you dont think you deserve better than some asshole yelling and living in fear, stop thinking about what you want and what you deserve. start thinking about your kids, and what THEY deserve. if your child was in a relationship with someone like your husband, would you be happy for them? would you encourage them to stay?

wagners7
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:43 PM

 The question is whether or not he wants to change and see's there is a problem.  If not, then there is not much you can do about it.  Your choice is limited to his actions.  You either put up with it or you don't. 

kngarber
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:45 PM


Quoting kw.2:

I think it's great that you are trying to work it out! Good luck (:
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IWannaLoveAgain
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 6:45 PM

its not uncommon for a woman to see her husbands potential.. fact is, if HE isn't willing to get his anger under control, then YOU need to leave. Youre teaching your kids that that behavior is ok.. if you have a son, you're teaching him that having anger toward or around his family is ok, and if you have a daughter you're teaching her that its ok to be with a man like that..

dont wait around for his potential to shine thru.. do whats right for you and your chldren, and that may mean leaving. :-\

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