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Hating DH a little right now

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

 I have to say that today is not a good day.  I am sick and have a million things to get done today as we are taking 3 of the kids to a hotel tonight to swim for my oldest ds's bday.  I have cupcakes to make, laundry to do, bags to pack, plus getting everything ready for the sitter who will be staying with the 2 little ones tonight.  I hate that I am the one who always does all the packing and planning for anything that takes us away for a night or a week.  I wash, dry, fold, and pack everything, I make lists of everything that needs to be done and if we are going on a vacation I also make a list of what needs to be repacked and broguht back after our trips.  DH comes home from work, loads the car and we go, he usually doesn't even pack his own stuff,  I want to go to work some days so bad so I can leave all of the home responsibilities behind and enjoy a day of nothing but adults.  I have 2 in diapers and also into everything else and now that the Christmas tree is up it is even worse.  I don't really hate my DH and he does help with the kids, takes the older ones to school and picks them up so I don't have to load up the babies twice a day to do that and that is a huge help.  I am trying to sort through all of our junk as we are moving in 6 months and I don't want to move stuff we haven't used in the 5 years we have been here but it is hard to leave the room with toddlers behind to do anything.  Laundry is almost impossible because it is in the basement and the babies can't go down there, it is where all the little toys (barbies, polly pockets, legos, etc) are so unless I put them both in their cribs to run down and switch out a load it doesn't get done until naptime or bedtime.  If I wait for DH to get home and the babies are awake I am not downstairs 3 seconds and he is yelling at the babies to leave stuff alone so I feel guilty being down there.  I would love to go away by myself, no kids, no one else just me for 24 hours, stay in a hotel and just be able to watch a little tv, read a book, take a nice long bath, just relax and not have to worry about whether or not a diaper is being changed, kids are really being watched.  I say really because I spent 32 hours in the hospital with my oldest dd and DH was home with the others and the 2 year old found the finger nail polish, painted herself, her clothes, my chair, and the living room carpet, and DH swears he just left her for a minute.  It isn't the DH I hate so much as it is my lack of freedom, I always wanted to be a SAHM but I guess my own mom made it all look so easy and it isn't.  I also am feeling the yearly holiday depression setting in and to add to it I have caught a cold and have a horrible sinus headache and just feel the need to whine a little.  Thanks

Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 2, 2011 at 10:34 AM
Replies (21-25):
by Anonymous 4 on Dec. 2, 2011 at 10:33 PM

Quoting heaven303:

Sounds like u don't need to have any more babies.

Shut the fuck up. How many kids do you have?

by Platinum Member on Dec. 3, 2011 at 2:13 AM

You will be o.k.  Maybe ask husband if he can watch the kids while you have some me time.  And that might only be reading alone in the room door closed and locked if possible and just you and some wine.  Or a bath with candles alone.  It is o.k. to wait until nap time or when they are asleep to do laundry.  Do not be hard on yourself you sound like a fine mom.  It is hard and don't feel guilty about husband telling babies no.  Husbands sometimes have a harder time be cause they are not always home but he does try let him do it his way it is o.k. to let go and let someone else take over for awhile.  Good Luck and Hope you feel better!!

by *Angelicious* on Dec. 3, 2011 at 2:16 AM

Quoting choff2685:

I enjoy doing all those things, that is my job as a SAHM, that is what I signed up for and my husband knows he works at his job so I don't have to and I will take care of everything. If I need help I just ask and he helps with a smile on his face. He just wants me and the kids to be safe and happy. Good luck! Try talking to your hubs

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by Bronze Member on Dec. 3, 2011 at 9:00 AM

I work full-time but I think a good SAHM is hard work too.  I honestly don't think I could do it mentally.  But I will tell you being a full-time working mom isn't easy either.  Working moms miss their kids and miss alot because they're working.  Also when I get home, I still do everything...changing diapers, baths, bed time, playing.  So I think being a mom is just hard when the babies are young.  I think you def need some alone time.  Maybe someone can watch all your kids for you one day so you can relax and not have to do anything.  Good luck to you

by Ruby Member on Dec. 3, 2011 at 9:33 AM

I want to go to work some days so bad so I can leave all of the home responsibilities behind and enjoy a day of nothing but adults.  Be careful what you wish for! You would then get to go to work for 8-10 hours a day, and then stay up late everynight doing everything you are trying to get done now!

Call your mom and thank her. She will really appreciate this!

Put your kids to bed and have a drink, with your feet up. You will feel a little better. And know this: it gets worse before it gets better! lol  Life with children is a marathon not a sprint. One day at a time mom!

And the last bit if advice I have- Hire a teenager to come and hang out with you once in a while. Let HER help YOU. :)

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