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how many of you

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 23 Replies

think if you had waited to have children at a later date, or a bit older, that you could have provided them and yourself with a better situation?

I AM NOT ASKING THOSE WHO ARE LIVING A GOOD SITUATION AND ARE ANNOUNCING IT. 

I just want the girls who think they would to answer and why.

Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 3, 2011 at 11:08 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:06 AM

no one?

karla85
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:15 AM
1 mom liked this
Do I think I could have provided better if a was older? Yes. Would I change anything? Not really. If I got an opportunity to start all over, I would do it the same way. Being able to give your 2 year old an iPad for Christmas doesn't make you a better parent. We are not rich, but my kids get to do different activities like any other kid. The fact that they won't get a laptop for Christmas doesn't mean I don't love them.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:23 AM
1 mom liked this
I don't feel it has anything to do with the gifts is give my children lol .. but yes if I could have waited I would have... I wouldn't have been so anxious to have kids ...I would have finished college been able to provide more as far as quality living .. i wouldn't have had times where I had to pawn things so my child could eat... Or had to work 2/3 jobs... He would have seen more of mommy.. ( but do I regret my son not at all maybe who I had him with ) but my child is the reason I am who I am today .. we have come a long way together ... And now a lot older married and his lil brother on the way ... I couldn't be happier... I still have a lot I want to accomplish in my life things I could have done when I was younger but hey better late than never :)
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artsymama89
by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:26 AM

 i had my son when i was 18. I was still in high school when i found out, so i busted my ass and graduated a month before i was due. My sons dad was my second real boyfriend. And he was so far from perfect, but since my parents hated him, i loved him. 

of course if we would've waited, we might have been in a better situation, finacially.. but honestly, if i didnt have my son when i did, i wouldnt even know his dad today. I would've left him years ago, went to college, got a job and been living on my own..figurng out my next move, maybe just starting to think about having a kid..

But If i could go back and change what happened, I dont believe i would. I love my little boy more than anything else. He gave my ife meaning, i love waking up everyday to his smiling little face. I like to think that this was the path i was always suppose to take..i was meant to be a mom to my wonderful little boy, regardless of what struggles we've gone through, and will continue to go through becuase we werent 'ready' to have him when we did.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:27 AM
You're thinking materialistically ... Not even where I think this poster is going sounds like a guilty concious for not providing what you really want for your kids.. no shame in that but let's be honest Any one is a liar if they say they wouldn't want to provide nicer things for our kids ... Even if that nicer thing is an ipod.. I love that my husband works hard and we can provide pretty much anything we want for our children and ourselves ... You only live once ... Make the most of your life now by whatever means that is.. but is never say is be satisfied poor or just making.. everyone wants to be stress free from money...


Quoting karla85:

Do I think I could have provided better if a was older? Yes. Would I change anything? Not really. If I got an opportunity to start all over, I would do it the same way. Being able to give your 2 year old an iPad for Christmas doesn't make you a better parent. We are not rich, but my kids get to do different activities like any other kid. The fact that they won't get a laptop for Christmas doesn't mean I don't love them.

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Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:32 AM

 I love my kids and would not trade them for anything now that they are here but I have often thought that maybe I should not of had kids (for more than one reason). So I know that at the very least I would have waited in hopes of having my Masters before they came along. We all would have done better then.

Miss-B
by ♥Divalicious♥ on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:35 AM
1 mom liked this
Your husband provides, not you. Just saying :)

Quoting Anonymous:

You're thinking materialistically ... Not even where I think this poster is going sounds like a guilty concious for not providing what you really want for your kids.. no shame in that but let's be honest Any one is a liar if they say they wouldn't want to provide nicer things for our kids ... Even if that nicer thing is an ipod.. I love that my husband works hard and we can provide pretty much anything we want for our children and ourselves ... You only live once ... Make the most of your life now by whatever means that is.. but is never say is be satisfied poor or just making.. everyone wants to be stress free from money...




Quoting karla85:

Do I think I could have provided better if a was older? Yes. Would I change anything? Not really. If I got an opportunity to start all over, I would do it the same way. Being able to give your 2 year old an iPad for Christmas doesn't make you a better parent. We are not rich, but my kids get to do different activities like any other kid. The fact that they won't get a laptop for Christmas doesn't mean I don't love them.

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cgriff89
by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:35 AM

IDK. The way things fell in my life they are good now. I am married, my DH makes enough for me to be a SAHM, and we are buying a house. But if I were still with my ex and you asked me this question the answer would be YES. But sometimes I do think what would have happened if I would have waited. I know I would have still left my ex because the kids were the only thing that kept us together for so long. I most likely would have still gotten with my now DH. But I would have gone to college and we would have had a savings and been set before we had any kids.

karla85
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:44 AM
You said OP wasn't talking about money, but your response pretty much is. If she meant emotionally, then its even better because I've been a good mom to them. And no guilt here, my kids have had a better life compared to when I was growing up. And its only going to get better.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're thinking materialistically ... Not even where I think this poster is going sounds like a guilty concious for not providing what you really want for your kids.. no shame in that but let's be honest Any one is a liar if they say they wouldn't want to provide nicer things for our kids ... Even if that nicer thing is an ipod.. I love that my husband works hard and we can provide pretty much anything we want for our children and ourselves ... You only live once ... Make the most of your life now by whatever means that is.. but is never say is be satisfied poor or just making.. everyone wants to be stress free from money...




Quoting karla85:

Do I think I could have provided better if a was older? Yes. Would I change anything? Not really. If I got an opportunity to start all over, I would do it the same way. Being able to give your 2 year old an iPad for Christmas doesn't make you a better parent. We are not rich, but my kids get to do different activities like any other kid. The fact that they won't get a laptop for Christmas doesn't mean I don't love them.

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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2011 at 9:46 AM
1 mom liked this

well, i am asking in the material way, not emotionally. if you are a regular mother, its not a question about how much you love them, but material whether we like it or not has a lot to do with how good a situation can be for a child. i am not stating being rich or even well off, but if a child is poverty level compared to a blue color child, you will see often less issues.

i certainly care for my child sufficiently and successfully i am not worried about myself. i just see how a lot of moms i have come accross wish they would have waited to finish hs, college, have a stable job, a stable relationship, a stable situation, prior to having kids.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're thinking materialistically ... Not even where I think this poster is going sounds like a guilty concious for not providing what you really want for your kids.. no shame in that but let's be honest Any one is a liar if they say they wouldn't want to provide nicer things for our kids ... Even if that nicer thing is an ipod.. I love that my husband works hard and we can provide pretty much anything we want for our children and ourselves ... You only live once ... Make the most of your life now by whatever means that is.. but is never say is be satisfied poor or just making.. everyone wants to be stress free from money...


Quoting karla85:

Do I think I could have provided better if a was older? Yes. Would I change anything? Not really. If I got an opportunity to start all over, I would do it the same way. Being able to give your 2 year old an iPad for Christmas doesn't make you a better parent. We are not rich, but my kids get to do different activities like any other kid. The fact that they won't get a laptop for Christmas doesn't mean I don't love them.


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