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Whoa hold the h€ll up..

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I was reading the post where if you were a stay at home mom and dh would want a divorce and I seen something. Half of you wouldn't fight to save your marriage!! My question is why..
Why wouldn't you fight? Why would you be willing to let him walk out the door so easily ?
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by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 5:10 AM
Replies (21-29):
brettsmomma
by ~Tammie~ on Dec. 4, 2011 at 10:12 AM

 I dont want to be with anyone who dont want me. 

RhondaVeggie
by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 10:23 AM
1 mom liked this
Quoting Anonymous:

I've been fighting for 7 years.  we have good days, but the bad far out number them.  I really think is base expectations of a wife are something I'll never be able to live up to.  He's looking for June Cleaver when all I've got is Rosanne.

as long as things are civil, I can deal with it, but I certainly wouldn't discourage him from moving on if he wanted it.

and before anyone asks, I have not persued a divorce because my access to money is limited and I need to make do until I can go back to work once the kids are in school full time.




That's not his problem, it's yours. You can choose to be a June Cleaver just as easily as you can choose to be a Roseanne. Most of us are not naturally perfect housewives, we have to try. I know that some days it takes a lot of effort to get up and clean the house and do the laundry and cook the dinner knowing that you will only have to do it again the next day. It can be very tempting to just say "screw it!" and ignore it all. But ask yourself, where does that leave you? You have a messy house and wind up throwing together a crappy dinner or getting take out and nobody is happy. Don't you and your family deserve a nice home and happiness? If you want that you need to pursue it and work for it. None of us are perfect, there are days when I'm running around all day and I barely have time to throw together pasta with sauce from the freezer for dinner or my hubby comes home early and I'm scrubbing the bath in my cruddy old yoga pants with my butt in the air but I try.
Rain2Rinse
by Gold Member on Dec. 4, 2011 at 10:27 AM
I am certainly not ashamed to fight, cry, beg. My marriage is worth fighting for. My husband is Worth fighting for. The family that we are structuring for my daughter is Worth fighting for.

I never thought that marriage would be easy. I thought it would be worthwhile. And it is.

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chickychatter
by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 11:04 AM

I think if they were really facing the situation they would react differently. It's very easy to say what you would do,but entirely different if you are facing the situation.

mrspierce06
by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 11:33 AM

Well if he wants out who am I to make him stay, even if he stayed after we "fixed" things I would always wonder if he really wished he had left, I would never be secure in the relationship again.

mrspierce06
by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 11:34 AM

exactly

Quoting brettsmomma:

 I dont want to be with anyone who dont want me. 


hp2011
by Ruby Member on Dec. 4, 2011 at 11:37 AM

They probably aren't happy in their marriage. Why force something that is just shitty? 

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Mother to Isaiah Malachi 5/1/08 and Kelly Jordan COMING SOON!

lovebeingmrs
by on Dec. 4, 2011 at 11:38 AM
Wow, way to support another mom. She may have things going on we font know about. My ex expected a clean house, dinner cooked, both kids clean and in bed by the time he got home every night, yeah I told him to go to hell

Quoting RhondaVeggie:

Quoting Anonymous:

I've been fighting for 7 years.  we have good days, but the bad far out number them.  I really think is base expectations of a wife are something I'll never be able to live up to.  He's looking for June Cleaver when all I've got is Rosanne.

as long as things are civil, I can deal with it, but I certainly wouldn't discourage him from moving on if he wanted it.

and before anyone asks, I have not persued a divorce because my access to money is limited and I need to make do until I can go back to work once the kids are in school full time.






That's not his problem, it's yours. You can choose to be a June Cleaver just as easily as you can choose to be a Roseanne. Most of us are not naturally perfect housewives, we have to try. I know that some days it takes a lot of effort to get up and clean the house and do the laundry and cook the dinner knowing that you will only have to do it again the next day. It can be very tempting to just say "screw it!" and ignore it all. But ask yourself, where does that leave you? You have a messy house and wind up throwing together a crappy dinner or getting take out and nobody is happy. Don't you and your family deserve a nice home and happiness? If you want that you need to pursue it and work for it. None of us are perfect, there are days when I'm running around all day and I barely have time to throw together pasta with sauce from the freezer for dinner or my hubby comes home early and I'm scrubbing the bath in my cruddy old yoga pants with my butt in the air but I try.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Dec. 4, 2011 at 11:47 AM

Wait a hot minute here!

Who says I have a messy house and don't do my job?  I do all my duties plus some.  I put a good meal on the table 9 times out of 10.  My kids are clean, polite, educated and caring people.

The problem is he expects me to follow him around the house attending his needs.  When he comes home he expects to have to do nothing.  food on the table, TV on his channel, not to have to deal with the kids.  He wants to play 'lord of the manor' and expects me to be like his mom, following him around, cleaning up after him, keeping the snack bowl full and keeping him content, but not to ask for anything for myself. 

If I do all those things, he's happy but I'm miserable and, in turn, so are the kids.  I've tried talking to him about it.  He says "this is a housewife.  you agreed to it."

Why should I be expected to sacrifice my happiness in a marriage that ranks my needs somewhere below the dog's?

and it's MY problem... f*uck you!

Quoting RhondaVeggie:

Quoting Anonymous:

I've been fighting for 7 years.  we have good days, but the bad far out number them.  I really think is base expectations of a wife are something I'll never be able to live up to.  He's looking for June Cleaver when all I've got is Rosanne.

as long as things are civil, I can deal with it, but I certainly wouldn't discourage him from moving on if he wanted it.

and before anyone asks, I have not persued a divorce because my access to money is limited and I need to make do until I can go back to work once the kids are in school full time.




That's not his problem, it's yours. You can choose to be a June Cleaver just as easily as you can choose to be a Roseanne. Most of us are not naturally perfect housewives, we have to try. I know that some days it takes a lot of effort to get up and clean the house and do the laundry and cook the dinner knowing that you will only have to do it again the next day. It can be very tempting to just say "screw it!" and ignore it all. But ask yourself, where does that leave you? You have a messy house and wind up throwing together a crappy dinner or getting take out and nobody is happy. Don't you and your family deserve a nice home and happiness? If you want that you need to pursue it and work for it. None of us are perfect, there are days when I'm running around all day and I barely have time to throw together pasta with sauce from the freezer for dinner or my hubby comes home early and I'm scrubbing the bath in my cruddy old yoga pants with my butt in the air but I try.


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