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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

help! no bashing please!!!! *slight edit

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 123 Replies


ok so the situation is as follows:

im 15 and due in 9 weeks with my daughter my bf and the father of the child is 18 we live in wv. my mom is expecting me to name the child with my last name and to deny knowing who the father is she is continually saying that cps will look into and that charges will be pressed against him with or without her or my consent i want to name my baby with his last name he wants me to also and has said that if he isnt on the birth certificate then he wont support me as much finnacially as he would if he was i understand that completly he has another child that he is fighting custody for and if were going to deny he is the father then the courts will not count her when he has to pay child support she says she has talked to people who work for cps and researched all of this but she hasnt we only have one computer and it is mine and she hasnt been on it in almost two weeks (she said she did all this just a few days ago) she also never leaves the house except to go on dates with her bf and they will go out to eat then come home but ill give her the benifit of the doubt. as for the calling again we only have one fone you can make calls on and its her cell phone ive looked thru the recent calls. no new numbers and no number for anything relating to cps. were at a loss for wat to do hes suggested we just say that he is the adopting father but im worred they will do a paternity test at the hospital im scared for him i dont want anything to happen to him and i want him to get his son we have been fighting all year for him to just get a visit i just need help please dont bash me ok ive had enuf of the bashing just please help me :'(


*ive seen where some of the ladies on here are assuming my maturity level and my mental capabilities id just like to clarify my age is far from what it should be and has been that way for years i had no childhood plain and simple i was busy raising my younger siblings while my mom worked then when she lost her job i got a break mabey a year before she started having major health issues (many are resolved but most still bother her) i again had to step up and take care of everyone including her whil her husband worked a very poor paying job so he was never home except to sleep then it was back to work when the issues were resolved i finally got my big break but again didnt last long my dead beat child molestor of an uncle had a child with his now ex wife she wasnt fit and knew it she basically abandoned the child at our house soon after moms health deteriorated again and with her husband still working his job and none of my siblings responsible at all i was left to care for the baby it didnt take long for the issues to become resolved this time but then mom got a divorce and started working 24/7 so i did not get my final break until 2 years ago when my aunt decided she was ready to care for her daughter (after she got remarried) i have been caring for people my entire life it has deteriorated my own body and i now have alot of health issues that are being resolved my life has been hell but ive always taken care of myself other than the income from whoever in the house was working i have also always held a 4.0 gpa i think i have proven i am more than fit to make my decisions for myself im not beingrude when i say that im only pointing out im not the ussual 15 yr old i really cant stand most 15 years olds anymore 

Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:13 PM
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Replies (1-10):
XoXomommaXoXo
by on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:14 PM
You'll be fine. Cos won't get called and charges won't happen inless your parents do it
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MissLeanna
by on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:14 PM
Smh
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NDADanceMom
by on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:18 PM
1 mom liked this

 trust me if your mom was going to file she would no matter what.  I would.  My daughter is 16 and if she was in your situation your baby daddy would be sitting in jail as a rapist and then have to register as an offender.  Your mom isnt going to do anything.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:20 PM
I don't think CPS reviews birth certificates. But in many states your BF could be prosecuted for statutory rape. And it's not up to him to decide whether to support his child or not - if he doesn't the state could go after him for that too. Hope it all works out for the best for you, whatever you decide to do.
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bellanoelsmom
by on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:21 PM
1 mom liked this
Check the statutory rape laws in your state. I would let him decide since its his butt that could end up in jail. Is your mom hoping to get p.a. For the child and collect $ from bf without the state knowing because that is also a crime punishable by law. Your baby could take bf's name later too, that can always be changed if you decide to. You have a lot to think about but I would be certain to use birth control after this. If he has two kids and he is only 18, he doesn't have a great track record. Protect yourself!
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:24 PM
9 moms liked this

18 and two kids,he needs to learn to use a condom

snowangel1979
by Bronze Member on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:25 PM

Honestly your mom is right if you put his name on and they find out he's 18 then he could go to jail and He'll be labeled a sex offender.

It could or couldn't happen but if just some random nurse/ county worker looks at the birth certificate when she's writing it up and does the math she could call the authorities.

 You'll have to go to court ( and properly have to be married to him)  for him to "adopt" the baby, they wont do that at the hospital.

 But to get C.S from him he will eventually have to be named the father. Idk 2 kids at 18 by 2 different moms not bashing but sheesh. Good luck.

RADmomma
by on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:26 PM

research your state laws. Do you have a local planned parenthood or family planning? They would also know. If it isnt a phone call you can make...ask a friend to call.

You dont need to provide a name or specific information...Simply ask...what would happen to 2 people in your situation.

I know that our local planned parenthood & family planning cannot talk to your parents unless you give them permission so they will definitely be able to provide you with some information on the legalities...

Good luck...

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:29 PM
1 mom liked this
Ok he can be charged with rape since you are under 16. Once you are 16, get a paternity test done and have him added to the birth certificate. They will do child support right there and if he hasnt been helping, get back support from when baby was born. If hes in jail, hes no good to you or baby.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 12, 2011 at 10:33 PM

no one is trying to get anything from him he is voluntarily getting everything we need he wants to his ex had trapped him into getting her pregnant and then split a few months after his son was born so he didnt get much of an expierience from that and wants to give our daughter everything he possibly can i just wana get this name thing figured out before she comes :(

Quoting bellanoelsmom:

Check the statutory rape laws in your state. I would let him decide since its his butt that could end up in jail. Is your mom hoping to get p.a. For the child and collect $ from bf without the state knowing because that is also a crime punishable by law. Your baby could take bf's name later too, that can always be changed if you decide to. You have a lot to think about but I would be certain to use birth control after this. If he has two kids and he is only 18, he doesn't have a great track record. Protect yourself!


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