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Does it ever get better!!?? Sorry kinda long :

Posted by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:07 PM
  • 18 Replies

I am honestly on the verge of asking for a divorce,he won't take me seriously! For a bit of back ground we have been married for 3 years, together for 6 and we have two children a boy and a girl ages 2.5 and 1. I work one day a week and am a full time student other wise I am a SAHM. My husband works 40+hours a week but seriously that is all he does. CLOCKS IN CLOCKS OUT. Virtually useless at home I have 4 bags of trash that needs taking out and I am constantly picking up after him. He doesn't even pay attention to our children,(literally ignores them) to the point I can't trust him to even watch them on the one day I work. He is not there for me emotionally, sexually, or spiritually. I am fed up and have been dealing with this for the last 3 years. I DO EVERYTHING!!!! My concern is that since things haven't changed in the last 3 years that they won't ever change. What to do!!?? Please no bashing for I am having a hard enough time as it is. Thanks

by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:07 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:09 PM

Did you say vows when you got married? Just curious

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:10 PM

Have you tried talking to him?  Counseling?  Is he willing to work on things?  If not, then my my answer is no-things will not get better.  And, if it's at that point, you need to figure out if you can live like this.

mathewss2490
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:11 PM

Yes we did, for better or for worse. But it is getting worse day by day and is out weighing the better. We have admitted to one another that we love eachother but are not IN Love with one another.

Quoting mathewss2490:

I am honestly on the verge of asking for a divorce,he won't take me seriously! For a bit of back ground we have been married for 3 years, together for 6 and we have two children a boy and a girl ages 2.5 and 1. I work one day a week and am a full time student other wise I am a SAHM. My husband works 40+hours a week but seriously that is all he does. CLOCKS IN CLOCKS OUT. Virtually useless at home I have 4 bags of trash that needs taking out and I am constantly picking up after him. He doesn't even pay attention to our children,(literally ignores them) to the point I can't trust him to even watch them on the one day I work. He is not there for me emotionally, sexually, or spiritually. I am fed up and have been dealing with this for the last 3 years. I DO EVERYTHING!!!! My concern is that since things haven't changed in the last 3 years that they won't ever change. What to do!!?? Please no bashing for I am having a hard enough time as it is. Thanks


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:11 PM

Here's what you do:

1. Remember you married him for "good times and bad". These are some of the bad times. Remember your wedding vows.

2.  Find a good marriage counselor. Most churches have them for free. Call churches with the big phone book ads first.

3. Call a crisis hotline. ONe to try is lovelines.  www.lovelines.org

4. Never badmouth him to your kids.

5.  Try to have a good attitude.

6.  Join a church if you aren't part of one yet. I recommend a church of Christ or non-denominational church.

7. Read the book "The Power of a Praying Wife"

SherylDe
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:12 PM

If it were me, I would consider counselling.  Would HE be willing to go?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:13 PM

8. Take it one day at a time.

9.  Try to plan a weekend getaway for just the two of you if possible. (Or at least a date night)

***HUGS***

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:13 PM
1 mom liked this

Have you though of hiring someone to help you clean, take out the trash, etc.

That's much cheaper than a divorce! By like thousands :)

mathewss2490
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:14 PM

He will not go to counseling I have been trying to make it work for the last 3 years and it takes two to fix things. I am kind of at a stand still it seems.

SimplyErathy
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:14 PM
1 mom liked this

that sounds exatcly like my husband 3 years into our marrige!! i ended up taking all our stuff and leaving and it was a big slap in the face. i came back after he came begging on his knees crying to me (i had a 14mo and a newborn at the time). he wasent perfect but he was better and over time and alot of listning he is a great daddy and husband now :) but it dosent always happen like this. some men just cant change :/ hugs mama

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 12, 2012 at 2:15 PM

i would talk to him about counseling first momma.

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