I'm considering leaving DH and not taking my kids.*UPDATE**UPDATE 2**
Quoting KrissyKC:
Sounds like DH isn't the problem. You are having problems inside of yourself. You don't feel like you or your life has any value or anything.
I suggest individual counseling and find hobbies and interests that give you value as a person. You feel lost in your husband's world and don't have much in your own.
it also sounds like you want to have a relationship with the kids and you may want custody in the future
it is really hard to get it if you leave now
seek help now please to find out what the best possible way out is
Not sure where you live but when divorcing and depending where kids reside if the mom is primary custodian then dad usually leaves the home and still provides so that the kids lives are not changed. I can't answer if your kids will forgive you but how you go about will certainly shape them. Have you tried counseling? This sounds like more than just wanting a divorce. Prayers and hugs.
I'm wondering if you might be depressed.Sounds like you have enough money that you can pretty much do what you want. Use this to your advantage. ASk yourself, what do I want? An education, a better body, a sense of purpose? Use your circumstances to get what you want. Go back to school, or take exercise classes, or volunteer.Do you know how many women would love to have your financial advantages? You could go to school full time and get a degree in something, then when you leave you can support yourself.
I have felt this before. I got my own place and I had everything but I still felt so empty.I felt accomplished that I could do it on my own but I went back because all I needed was to prove mmy self worth. I did make a mistake along that way but it's something that you need to do sometimes. My child's father is an excellent dad though even when I am not the best mother he does for his child!
I was going to say this as well. I can understand that you feel that you're between a rock and a hard place, but the courts will think you're a horrible mother and may even assume that it was a case of abandonment which could put you in jeopardy of losing custody of your children. Just take that under advisement. I'm not trying to pass judgment on you. You sound like a very involved and loving mother who would even think about doing this unless you felt you didn't have a choice.
Quoting Anonymous:
Do what you must but be forewarned that courts ALSO frown upon mothers who leave their children.
Your husband can use that against you and keep custody of the kids if you ever do decide that you can take care of them and it'll be tough shit for you.
I'm offering you support. :) and I honestly hope things get better or you won't regret your decision.
I wish the best for you in whatever you decide. It can't be promised that your children won't hold it against you someday. My sister has left 2 out of her 3 children behind twice and they lost respect for her after the first time she left. They Love her but it's hard for them.
It's official. My 9 year old girl wants to be a boy (EDIT)
- PlineyJane
Bronze Member on Feb. 19, 2012 at 1:08 PMSounds like you two have just grown apart over the years. That happens to everyone at some point or another. Life gets you busy and you stop working on your relationship cause you feel like you are in a safe zone. You need to work on your relationship. Sounds like you need to get a job, let go of the nanny and just be the person you set out to be. You are relying on everyone else for happiness, they aren't giving it to you now you want to look elsewhere for it. You won't find it there either.
Let the nanny go, spend time with your kids, their isn't anything she can give them that you can't. Get a job a couple days a week, just so that you find yourself and spend time with everyday ppl and not sit around feeling worthless. It happens time to time you feel as though you aren't contributing to anything. Just working and having a little self worth helps eons.
Then spend one night a week out with your dh. Not with you or him working on other things, spend that time together, talk about hopes and dreams for the future. Find what you still have in common. Go do something childish with each other. Sounds like thats all you need to do to me. Find yourself. You can do that without leaving dh or your kids. But thats just my opinion.