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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Stepkids dont rank in front of bio kids

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Just because they came first dont mean they come first. They should rank the same and anyone who says different is a bitter cunt. Oh and its normal to feel more bond with a baby you grew in your own body than a kid youve only known a few years out of its life. But that dont mean you dont love them too. Stop telling everyone theres one rule for every situation and if you dont fit in that little box your a sucky stepmom. Some of you bitches who gang up on the stepmoms need to get a jar of peanut butter stuck up your ass.

Love, a bio mom who isnt a stepmom but thinks not all stepmoms are bad

And explain to me why i should feel the same about a stepkid if me and the dad got divorced and Id have NO rights to it at all. You cant have it both ways.
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 27, 2012 at 10:06 PM
Replies (31-40):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 27, 2012 at 10:31 PM
No one ranks before my kids
ariesp19
by on Feb. 27, 2012 at 10:31 PM

 you know, i never got the whole 'they were here first, they are his oldest, they come first...

cause in an intact family, you dont say 'oh, aidan is 6, he was here first, hes the most imprtant, he comes first'....

i dont put my 6 year old before my twins.... all my kids have the same dad.... the oldest does not come first cause he was here first... i love them all, they all come first.... sometimes aidan has needs that have to be met, other times, caleb, or one of the twins....

all needs are met, in the order they arive... i dont put aidan on top of the list cause hes oldest....

 

Lynette
by on Feb. 27, 2012 at 10:31 PM

I grew up with the best dad in the world and technically he was a my stepdad, he married my mom when I was 4.  He always treated me just the same as my other siblings(they had 4 more kids after they got married).  It breaks my heart to read how stepmoms on this site think about their stepkids.  It would have broken my heart growing up being treated w/ less love because we didn't share the same DNA.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 27, 2012 at 10:37 PM
So adopted kids shouldn't be loved as much as birth kids? They didn't come out of your vagina. Some are older so you don't raise them from birth? How ignorant for you to make a statement about something you don't know about. My step parents were the most amazing people. My step father passed shortly after my mother and it felt like a part of me died with him. My step mother is great. She never treated my fathers first set of children any differently than theirs. If a woman marries a man with kids she should be prepared to take on all that comes with that. His children do come before your children. If he had 3 kids from his first marriage and you had 3 his loyalities should lie with them and he shouldn't provide for your children then. How about that.
ROBIN-C
by Gold Member on Feb. 27, 2012 at 10:48 PM

 so many variables! depends on the stepparents relationship with the child. how the child treats the stepparent. the extended relationships with the bio parents (yes that affects a lot of things!).

for me i love all 3 the same! would do anything for any of them.... BUT i like them differently at different times based on their behavior, lol!

mom2cheesebug
by on Feb. 27, 2012 at 11:05 PM

Thank you, I just wish more stepmoms would of weighed the pros and cons of dating a single dad and consider the child/ren as well. There is a reason a lot of stepkids are messed up, they feel less loved.

Quoting MsSpice:

I wish that more Stepmoms were like you.

Quoting mom2cheesebug:

I love my stepkids just as much as my own child. I had to earn their love, my childs came natural. They look just like their sister and dote over her, i couldn't ever imagine loving one more than the other. And yes, i would be completley crushed if me and their dad seperated, but hopefully thats not something i ever have to deal with.

To each their own though. You can't force someone to love a child thats not theirs or treat them as their own. It takes a very special person to be a stepmom.

 


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 27, 2012 at 11:10 PM

 Are you able to explain your lack of correct usage of the English language? Why do you refer to a child as an it? Sorry, but I don't agree with you, if a man has children by one woman and then goes and starts another family with someone else, the first set of children should be taken care of before the new family. He knew he had the responsability to the first family. If he has a difficult time providing for them then he has no business starting a new family. As far as loving a child that you gave birth to more than a child that didn't grow inside you is pure bullshit and a huge cop out. If you are unable to open your heart to the child or chidren of a man you decide to get involved with, you should have thought twice about getting involved. It is ignorant if a woman expects a man to turn his back on his kids.....

annas_momma
by Platinum Member on Feb. 27, 2012 at 11:12 PM
You should treat them all the same. Period the end!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
sarahfire
by Platinum Member on Feb. 27, 2012 at 11:12 PM

LOL well thanks, from this stepmom. I agree.

Eco_Momma
by on Feb. 27, 2012 at 11:18 PM

my ex-"step"dad calls me his daughter all the time. He loves me the same as he loves his bio kids. he calls my kids his grand kids. 

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