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Please read! (warning: Long)

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 36 Replies


I have contemplated posting this for the last couple of hours.  I didn't want to hear what I already know.  However, I need to get it out, and things got worse.


Today is Sunday, which means my SO takes our 3 y/o DS to sunday school, and spends the day doing stuff and they come back around dinner time.  I get a chance to be with our other son who will be 2 in a couple weeks.  I feel that I have missed out on a lot of the baby things, and really enjoy this one on one time.  It also gives me a chance to relax, clean, laundry, and an opportunity cook a very yummy Sunday super.  We all woke up late, thanks to day light savings time, and the two of them were off to a crazy late start.  Oh, well, it happens.  We texted a few times during the day and talked once or twice.  Didn't seem to be any problems.  I went on with my day as I always do.  Around the time that they would be getting back, he called me.  "I got rear ended."  My first question was if everyone was alright, and the car.  "Everyone is fine, very little damage, I think they just hit the hitch"  I suggested he take down the info anyways, and when he got home he could looks and make sure there wasn't any damage.  Even a scratch on our nice car should get fixed.  He calls back a couple of times, he wasn't really making any sense.  He told me the car info, and said he got the guys name and liscenses plate.  I am like ... Okay.  Great!  I asked if he was going to call the cops, or just file a police report when he got home.  Best to cover all basis.  He said, "I'll think about it, let me hang up and focus."  okay, no big deal.  A little time passes and the two of them walk through the door.  Everyone is fine!  :)  I greet, and begin the normal conversation with my son about how everything went at Sunday school.  Then SO starts yelling.  He asking me for the guys info!  I told him, I don't have it, I didn't write it down.  He just FREAKS OUT!  Then it happens.  

He grabs me, he pinches me, he kicks me the wrisk.  At some point I got a little cut on my lip.  I am just freak out, I start crying.  Which makes him more mad.  I told him I am going to leave.  And he storms out of the house.  (this is right in front of our 3 y/o)  I text him that I didn't do anything wrong.  he text back profanities, and horrible things.  He is gone for hours.  I am shaking inside, and just spending time with my boys.  

Then he gets home.  He goes to the fridge to get dinner out.  He doesn't say two words to me.  I am still really upset, and pissed off.  I told him the salad was mine.  Then get out another dish I made.  I told him that was mine.  He THREW the bowl on the floor.  Smashed it (it was a very nice glass bowl) and pieces or EVERYWHERE!  (again, in front of the 3 y/o).  "there you go, eat it off the floor."  He grabs his keys and walks out. 

I put the boys in bed.  I texted him whats going on?  Whats wrong?  Why is he acting this way?  He asks me to stop.  No answers.  


This is completely out of his character.  We have had two other fights were I could say I have seen this anger, but I totally was pushing his buttons.  This time, I honestly did nothing.  Sure, I didn't write down the guys info ... but I thought he did!  

Please tell me what you think??


Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ChickenTheChina
by on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:54 PM

He must have something else going on that you don't know about. My first instinct is what does he do while your son is in Sunday school? Could he possibly be with another woman, and this anger is really just guilt? Maybe he's trying to find reasons to get mad at you, or build you up in his mind as this horrible person to justify his actions? A lot of men who are having an affair, whether it be physical or emotional, will try and break up your relationship, by making it seem like it's your fault, so they can be with the other woman with no guilt. He also may just have anger issues. He may need to look into anger management.

DevinAnnesmom
by Sarah on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:55 PM

Hmmm...I don't know what to say. Is he bipolar? That's what it sounds like to me. If this is completely out of character for him then maybe he should see a doctor.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:57 PM


Quoting ChickenTheChina:

He must have something else going on that you don't know about. My first instinct is what does he do while your son is in Sunday school? Could he possibly be with another woman, and this anger is really just guilt? Maybe he's trying to find reasons to get mad at you, or build you up in his mind as this horrible person to justify his actions? A lot of men who are having an affair, whether it be physical or emotional, will try and break up your relationship, by making it seem like it's your fault, so they can be with the other woman with no guilt. He also may just have anger issues. He may need to look into anger management.

Well, today he went to get our tire fixed.  Then I think he got a coffee and oatmeal at this little cafe he likes.  I am not saying this isn't possible, but kind of seems unlikely. 

I was thinking the same thing, that there has to be something else that happening in his life.  Thats why I texted him what was wrong.

MrsSamMerlotte
by Gold Member on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:58 PM
Idk but I would find.somewhere safe for you to stay tonight. Maybe call the hospital.
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XandersMama2012
by on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:58 PM

Sounds like ur DH needs some anger management classes

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:58 PM


Quoting DevinAnnesmom:

Hmmm...I don't know what to say. Is he bipolar? That's what it sounds like to me. If this is completely out of character for him then maybe he should see a doctor.

No.  Not bipolar.  We've been together almost 7 years.  3 major anger outburst, and first time he actually touched me forcefully.  

He is a brilliant, man.  Literally, a genuis.  Normally very loving. 

AnastasiaKorsh
by on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:59 PM
1 mom liked this
Pack your stuff and leave. Only a matter of time before a few episodes of violence turns into much more. Do not go back until he gets into anger management.
snowi
by on Mar. 11, 2012 at 9:59 PM
Hugs. Im so sorry for how u were treated.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2012 at 10:00 PM


Quoting MrsSamMerlotte:

Idk but I would find.somewhere safe for you to stay tonight. Maybe call the hospital.

I live in an apartment building.  My neighbor has offered me her couch, or to come sleep with me in my livingroom.  We have very similar beliefs, and customs, and she is very understanding. 

happybunnymommy
by on Mar. 11, 2012 at 10:00 PM
No suggestions on what could be wrong... I'm sorry you're going through this... (((((hugs))))
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