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Is it normal to feel depressed when you first find out you're pregnant?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I just found out I'm pregnant last night and it will be my second child at 21.  Just as i started focusing on myself again, it seems like this has shattered all my future dreams and aspirations to become something more in life.  I don't mean to offend, but I just can't live being a sahm my whole life.  I know my reasoning is selfish, but I just can't seem to stop crying.  When you first found out you were pregnant with your kids, did you ever go through depression?  Is it normal?  

*Before anyone plans to attack me by claiming i shouldn't have sex if I don't want kids, I am living with my bf who's the father of both my kids, and my bc failed me.  

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 30, 2012 at 2:36 PM
Replies (51-60):
by on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:04 AM
Very normal
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by on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:06 AM
4 moms liked this
That's a stupid comment

Quoting Anonymous:

Its probably because your man left and you getting no dick

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by on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:09 AM
I was the same way with all three of my pregnancies. They were all planned but once I knew there was actually a baby coming I got scared and overwhelmed. Hopefully you will feel better in time. Good luck!
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by on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:10 AM
My second daughter was not planned at all. My first was only 8 months old when I found out I was pregnant again. I cried for days. I was scared about having two so close together and how I was going to love another when my heart was so full with my first. I slowly got used to the idea, but didn't feel that deep connection like I did during that first pregnancy. Now she is two and I wouldn't have it any other way. She is a mommy's girl and I can't imagine life without her.
by on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:27 AM

I was very upset when I found out that I was expecting my 4th.  I was waiting until my ds went into kindergarten in the Fall to go back to school.  I hate not having a job so I can make my own money.  When I found out that I was pregnant, I was 41 and madder than a wet cat at dh.  For 4 years I have been bugging my man to get snipped and he kept telling me that he was going to get it done.  We found out on our 16th anniversary.  Dh didn't stop swear for about an hour after I told him that the Dr confirmed it.  Dh spent a lot of money on me that day trying to make up to me.

I do feel like I have put my plans on hold.  I am putting off taking my 1st class until dd goes further between feeding.

What is amazing is that dd finally giggled at her 3 big brothers (14, 10, and 5).  They are totally enthralled with her until she messes her diapers:-)  Try to find the positives in you expected baby.  I know that I have found at least on positive.  Whenever I want to punish my 2 oldest dss, I make them clean dd's poopie cloth diaper.  They REALLY dread this punishment.  LOL

Congratulations.  I hope that your pregnancy, labor & delivery go well.

by on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:37 AM

that is very common.  all of my children were planned except for one, with that one i was extremely depressed,  but, believe it or not i had some depression in the beginning of my pregnancy with my fifth child who was planned.  even though we wanted to get pregnant, when it actually happened i was feeling exactly what you are feeling.  and i was afraid to tell my family that i was pregnant again, because they all thought that we were done, etc.

you have been given some wonderful words of encouragement.  you dont have to put your life on hold.  i am a full-time student even with five children under 14 and my youngest two being ages 2 and 1.  it's harder! but it can be done!  i hope everything starts to look up for you, soon!

by Ruby Member on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:41 AM

Don't feel like the baby is ruining your plans. Let it be bigger motivation. 

I had my first at 22, and my second at 24. At that point, I was a CNA. I had "plans" of being an RN before I had kids. It just didn't work out that way. 

When my second was 3 weeks old, I went to school to be an LPN. I graduated a week before her first birthday. It was hard, but so worth it. I'll be going back to be an RN once both my kids are in school (they are almost 4 and almost 2 now). 

So, what I'm saying is that it may have seemed like my kids "ruined" my plans..but really, all it did was push my plans back a little bit. Nothing wrong with that. 

There's no reason you can't do whatever you want even though you have kids. Sure, it will be difficult, but, as I said, it's so very worth it! 

by on Apr. 2, 2012 at 2:45 AM
It's normal.

by Buzz Lightyear on Apr. 2, 2012 at 3:55 AM

I had a friend who was depressed intitially, and she felt better after having thought about it. do what feels best for you :)

by Bronze Member on Apr. 2, 2012 at 4:58 AM

its normal, but you are young you have plenty of time to do all the things you want another baby will only postpone it for a short time.

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