PLEASE HELP. I FART IN MY SLEEP.

[Anonymous]

I am so embarrassed. I've been dating my SO for a year and apparently he told his brother I fart in my sleep because the brother got drunk and joked with me about it! I HAD NO IDEA. And I dont have the courage to address it with MY SO.

We came back from dinner the other, and the brother was visiting, I fell asleep on the couch, and I FARTED, while they were watching TV.

I looked everywhere. Gas X doesn't work. I cut dairy. 

I haven't been able to have sex for 2 weeks because I know he knows I FART every single night and it's so gross!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What can I DO?

[Fifi834]

You know his ass farts, too, so let 'em rip!

[RiotousDigits]

Omg... the bloating!! And when you took it out the next morning you'd play a symphony

Quoting iluv2meow:

butt plug

[nickysmom71]

[etsmom]

You can get over it. Every human  on the planet farts. Gas is built up from foods breaking down in the digestive tract. Some foods produce more gas than others. You can't help it. It has to come out and the fastest way is through the anus. Sorry, you are going to fart no matter what.

[The_Doodle]

Er, fart anyways. They're probably picking on you because they can tell it embarasses you. Just joke around about it and if they say anything to you about it, go over and fart on them.

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

NO WAY!!

HAHA

But he has NEVER FARTED!! I'M THE STINKY ONE!

Quoting Anonymous:

haha, I'm sorry but it happens! My husband and I were spooning one night and I "tooted" so hard it woke me up and ricocheted off his leg!! Laugh about ti!

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

i KNOW THEY find it so funny. but I DIE every time they talk about it. I run to the next room!

Quoting The_Doodle:

Er, fart anyways. They're probably picking on you because they can tell it embarasses you. Just joke around about it and if they say anything to you about it, go over and fart on them.

[Anonymous]

Just don't dutch oven him and you'll be fine!

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

HONESTLY I THOUGHT YOU WOULD HAVE IDEAS ON HOW TO STOP FARTING VERSUS YAY, WE ALL FART. WTF.

[The_Doodle]

That is why they keep bringing it up! Because it's funny how it freaks you out. Act like it doesn't bother you and they will drop it. 

Quoting Anonymous:

i KNOW THEY find it so funny. but I DIE every time they talk about it. I run to the next room!

Quoting The_Doodle:

Er, fart anyways. They're probably picking on you because they can tell it embarasses you. Just joke around about it and if they say anything to you about it, go over and fart on them.