Is this the new norm?
- 838 Replies
Does anyone ever get married anymore, BEFORE having kids? It drives me crazy that people have so many kids, by different fathers, etc. Seriously, what ever happened to getting married and THEN having children? I get you mess up in HS or whatever, have a kid, etc. but to just keep doing it?? I know a girl who's 20, has 3 kids, 3 different dad's, and to me, that is just insane!!! Just wanting to know why it's not important to give kids stability anymore?
Why does it drive you crazy and you are NOT the one in the situation? How are you not judging? I hate to tell you there are some very stable single mothers and fathers out here. Just like there are some very unstable married parents.
I absolutely agree with you. And I do because I have witnessed children's behaviors in both environments... and 9 times out of 10, the child raised living from home to home with mom's new boyfriends, or dad's new girlfriends... that child acts out. that child doesn't feel like mom or dad is paying enough attention to them and their well-being... And also there is no sense of stability in the child's life. The child learns to manipulate the people around them, and learns when mom or dad is at their "weakest" time...
Quoting malexander2009:We got married before we had children. I feel bad for those that think they do bring their children up in a great enviroment with different people walking in and out. I do know several young women who feel that the more people they are accustomed to the better chances they have for a successful future. Yet no one can get their children to listen to them because there is no stablity in child rearing. BTW I am 24.
this why single women every where should know what they want, take time to find themselves, wait for the right partner, and choose wisely!
Meh. Our daughter was nine months old when we got married. We've been together five years.
Quoting atyou:
You are absolutely trying to judge. You dont just get to tack that on there to make yourself 'sound' nice. Own it.
Youre "not trying" to judge, but you are.
If it's important to YOU to be married before procreating, that's your right. It's also your right to instill those values in your children.
Other people? None of your business.
I get what you are saying even though I had 2 children before I got married to THEIR father.Then we had our third after marriage. I see marriage more of a contract then the whole "soul mate" thing. It's a big commitment to take because now everything that was his is now yours and vice versa. If you are not willing to make any legal commitments to your partner then you shouldn't make that commitment to have children together. Having a marriage before children provides a more stable environment for them because you basically signed a contract, which makes it harder for a party to walk a way from their commitment without big consequences.
They are trying to ban buying soda from FS
Do you REGRET having kids