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i dont think child support should be court ordered

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
IF the parents are not married. The woman always has the choice whether or not to abort and the dad is just stuck for 18 years paying for a child and taking away from his real family ..the one he WANTS..and i am on the womans end. I had a child at 18. His dad begged me to have an abortion even though we had been together since we were 15. I refused. So even though he has stayed in his life i am extremely lax on him. If he doesnt have cs then i dont bug him for it. He pays when he wants and sees him when he wants. I married my now hubby when he was 2.he has always taken care of him as his own. Along with the 3 we have together. Now if the parents are married and BOTH decide to have a child together than he should be responsible also. My huband who has raised him has assumed all responsibility for him and we actually separated for a while several years ago for 6 months. and he was the one who continued to support him. When he needed something i called him..granted we were working our marriage out..had we divorced i would not have expected that from him...i know some bashers will say..if he doesnt want the responsibility then dont fuck but im saying it goes both w ays. If you dont want to raise a child on ur own..than be more choosy who spread ur legs for..ultimately its not fair to the man who has no choices after the child is conceived. Women should never be forced to have an abortion and men should never be forced unwillingly into the huge debt if cs

EDIT..if you believe that a mans options end at conception than WHY oh WHY does the womans options remain..abortion AND adoption. Does she have to pay cs to the family who adopts her baby?..not one person has given one single reason why a woman should have options with an unwanted pregnancy and a man should not. A woman who gives her baby up is not even looked down on but viewed as brave..why such the double standard???..
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 14, 2012 at 3:25 PM
Replies (51-60):
singlemom1208
by on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:00 PM
I disagree. Takes 2 to play. You play you pay
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kyuteangl88
by on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:00 PM
1 mom liked this
If the father doesn't wasn't anything to do with a child, he shouldn't be having sex.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:03 PM
Quoting Anonymous:

 what if the "man" wants the baby, even if they aren't married, then later changes his mind?  because they weren't married is the child to suffer?  what if they were married and hubs didn't want another baby? tough shit?  what if they are married and the baby isn't his?  in many states it's a tough shit on that one too! 




There is no mind changing... If he chose yes and baby is born, there is no turning back. If hubs does not want another baby he can flip on a condom or refuse sex until the wife gets her tubes, tied. If he suspects baby is not his he needs to get a paternity test.
blue_elephant
by on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:04 PM
If the man chooses to have unprotected sex, then the man also chooses to take responsibility for the child he helped create!!! It is not just on the woman to support a child she did not create herself, and abortion is her choice and her choice only, her body not his...he chose to leave his "seed" so he also chooses to take responsibility for it regardless!
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LaughCryLive
by Ruby Member on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:05 PM
Did your husband not decide with you to have a child? BS.


Quoting Anonymous:

I honestly do not believe in child support hardly at all. i am pro life, even, and I can still understand your argument. I already told my husband if he leaves, he will be free and clear of support in the future. If you make a fucking CHOICE to bring a baby into the world, you need to woman up and take care of it.

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Salsacookies
by Gold Member on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:06 PM

What does being married have to do with anything? Married people have accidental pregnancies too and the father could still not want the baby. If the mom decides against aborting, the father is still forced to support the baby that he didn't want. Being married has nothing to do with it.

all4Him999
by Bronze Member on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:07 PM

You shouldn't enable your baby's daddy to be a dead beat dad.  When 2 people consent to have sexual intercourse, then, both parties consent to all the "what ifs" that could happen because of the consenual sex.  It takes two to create a baby and just because the man enjoyed the making of said baby, doesn't entitle him to not be responsible for the not-fun part.  The child deserves to be, at least, financially taken care of by his parents.  If men don't want a baby, then, use self control and don't have unprotected sex or trust a woman when she says she's on bc...I'm sorry, but people having sex need to hold themselves to a higher standard and not only protect themselves from unplanned pregnancies, but protect the child that could be hurt from your poor decisions.  

cartersmommy407
by on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:10 PM
This


Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting lordkanarven:

I think if he wants to be a part of the child life he should have to pay child support. If he deosnt pay child support then he has no place being involved with the child but also shouldnt be forced too.


i totally agree with that.

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seraphimsong
by Gold Member on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:14 PM
Totally agree! Why does the woman have a right to choose, but not a man?

Quoting Aspirel:

That is just BS-the mother can go get an abortion anytime she wants if the child is unwanted and the father cant say shit about it. But if she chooses to keep the baby he is responsible for that kid he doesnt want for 18 years?That is the biggest double standard I have ever seen.

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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 14, 2012 at 4:15 PM

 in my state, it doesn't matter, married means hubs is responsible party!

Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting Anonymous:

 what if the "man" wants the baby, even if they aren't married, then later changes his mind?  because they weren't married is the child to suffer?  what if they were married and hubs didn't want another baby? tough shit?  what if they are married and the baby isn't his?  in many states it's a tough shit on that one too! 




There is no mind changing... If he chose yes and baby is born, there is no turning back. If hubs does not want another baby he can flip on a condom or refuse sex until the wife gets her tubes, tied. If he suspects baby is not his he needs to get a paternity test.

 

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