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What was your situation when you first had a child? Were you prepared?

Posted by Anonymous
  • 45 Replies

One thing that will cause you to get crucified on here is if you had a child and did not have every single penny of the money to pay for the child, and weren't completely prepared in every way to bring a child in to the world. However, I believe most people aren't completely prepared. 

Toward the end of my pregnancy DH got laid off of work which meant he was cut down to about $165 a week. It's not like I could take my pregnancy back. That's life for you. It happens. It's when the economy took a huge hit the first time a few years ago and a lot of people lost their jobs. It took him 11 months to even find a job and yes he was looking and applying! It's just where we live the main jobs all lost their businesses.

We had our own place we were paying for but we had to move in with the parents because we didn't have enough for every thing. We made payments on our home while we lived with them and it sucked!

The first year of my baby's life was spent in a little room at my parents house.

We had to get on food stamps for a little while and haven't been on them in a few years. 

Every thing unexpectedly went bad and nope we weren't prepared for any of it, but we didn't just settle. My DH found a good job, we got off assistance, we were able to move in to our own home again and I am fixing to start college. No, I absolutely do not regret when I had my baby. I wouldn't have waited until later on either. We were able to provide the essentials. I bargain shopped, and my baby shower really helped me out with every thing else. I also breastfed. It's nice to be completely prepared for things like that, but the truth is nobody can ever be prepared enough for a child. 

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 16, 2012 at 10:53 AM
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by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 10:55 AM

no, i was not prepared. dd was unplanned, but a welcome surprise. 

ds was planned, and we were prepared for him. 

by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 10:59 AM

I was kinda prepared. I was 18 and single (stupid). I had no family support. I had an apartment in my parents basement and had to pay rent. I had to buy every single thing myself. Furniture, clothes, you name it. I had no baby shower and when I went into labor and had to have an emergency c-section, I was all alone. But I made it without any help. I saved money during my pregnancy and breastfed so I was able to stay home until she was almost a year old. I never needed assistance or help from the government or any family. My dd is now almost 5. I am married to a wonderful man and my life is so different I can barely believe it at times.

by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:02 AM
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 I was in an abusive relationship with my daughter's father. He moved me to Georgia from my hometown in Ohio so I wouldn't have a support system. He did not take care of me - I had no medical insurance, couldn't see the doctor, couldn't eat healthy, couldn't drive, didn't have money, couldn't talk to family, etc. I got away from him one day and called my mom; she left the next day, drove to GA and picked me up. She took me to Kansas to live with her sister until I could get on my feet.

I got a job within two weeks of moving here. I lived with my Aunt until a few months after my daughter was born. I worked hard, saved up my money, and moved into an apartment. In the years since I have managed to get an even better job, buy a house, and settle into a comfortable lifestyle with my daughter. I have been with the same boyfriend since a couple months after my daughter was born and we are now expecting baby #2...and I am financially stable enough to support both of my children. I've come a very long way since I got away from my abusive ex, and I'm very proud of myself and what I've accomplished. :)

by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:03 AM
My Son was the best Surprise ever, and I were very prepared, thanks to so many people who helped Us.
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by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:04 AM
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 We weren't financially ready for any of our 3 children but I'm glad they are here and part of my life.  I was on medicaid with all of them so the state booted the bill.  I was on food stamps when I had 2 of them so the state was paying for our food as well.  My last child came at a time when my hubby was unemployed so how about that???  LOL  We were so unprepared for them all but yet God took care of us regardless.  :)

by Platinum Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:05 AM

We were surprised, but we were also prepared.  Both working, owned a home, older (30's).  The pregnancy cancelled the wedding though.

Noone is ever truly "prepared" for a baby (takes more than $$) - but if you start from a solid foundation (you're not real young, working, educated, in a strong relationship) - you can bounce back from some of life's setbacks.  But you can't have a setback if you've never taken a step forward.  In that case you just have to say, "shit happens".

by Bronze Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:07 AM

both my kiddos were a not fully prepared but we did well.

by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:07 AM
I was 19 and happily married. We planned our son had good jobs, our own home and health insurance.
We didn't have a college fund in savings but could afford our babies needs and wants as well as me to stay home after birth.
I never left my child and was 100% commited to doing anything I could for him. As I grow older my ideals change but I gave him the very best I had then just as I do now.
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by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:08 AM

Not even close to prepared. I had known DH a few months, I was in Uzbekistan deployed with the AF, I was 24, I was shocked. lol

by Ruby Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:10 AM

Yes we were we planned both of our children.

We had (still do) health insurance, jobs, etc....and with our first we were married 2 yrs already. So yes, I feel we were prepared enough for a child.

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