For all you that say "leave him"

[Anonymous]

If you've never been cheated on by your husband in all fairness you can't say "divorce him". Unless you have personally been in that situation you don't know how you would handle it. I was one of those who said I'd leave him if he ever cheated and he did and I stayed. Not because I was afraid to be alone or to keep my kids dad close, I stayed because I LOVE HIM!!! I learned that day to not be so quick to tell people to divorce because it's not that easy. Especially if you love someone, we all make mistakes and it's what we do with those lessons that make us better. Maybe next time you jump to tell a women to leave her husband you should think about what YOU would do IF you truly LOVE him. I don't regret for one instant about loving him and staying with him. We are a better couple now than we have been in years.

[TxCowGirl07]

If he isnt as much in love with you as you are with him, then your love for him just gives him the power to do it again because he knows you will forgive him.

Quoting mama_2_jasper:

This. It's not about how much YOU love him. It's about if HE loves You enough to care about your feelings. And about loving yourself and knowing that you deserve better than that.

Quoting iloveashton804:

 I still know I would leave him. Cheating doesn't just happen by accident. He would know that him cheating on me would break my heart. If knowing that, he decided that having sex with someone else was worth the pain that he would cause me, he is not worth it.

[hp2011]

I stayed.

One of the biggest mistakes of my fucking life.

[MamatoKy]

.....this

Quoting Anonymous:

He doesn't love you if he's fucking someone else and also cheating is not a mistake it is a thought out process. 

[gramattmom]

My ex husband cheated on me and we went to counclling and he still contiuned to cheat on me,  He   cheated  on me  8  times that I know  of,  there are some men that wont stop cheating, once a cheater always a  cheater...so I  left,  that was no  life for me or my kids

[love_me4ever]

I have no tolerance for cheating, that would torn me to pieces,i coudnt sleep besides someone who I knew betrayed me in the worst possible way.

[TruCowboysFan]

No matter how much I love him, how much could he love me if he fucked another woman? You say we all make mistakes but I think once he gets away with it the first time, hes gonna do it more and more. I'd like to think I'd leave but you're right, I don't know how I'd handle it and I hope I never have to find out.

[waterlily89]

Everyone that i was with including the father of my kids, cheated... and my SO now cheated and he is the only one i stayed with because YES he did cheat and YES it did hurt, BUT he took the blame the very first person i was with that blamed himself instead of me and i did, give him a reason i lived out of my car we were having problems and my car remained pack for the day i decided i couldnt take it anymore i spent nights at my friends my moms and then i found out he cheated  one night standand it struck me that it hurt me so much cause i love him and do not wanna let go i am just now over the hurt and stopped thinking he was still cheating but he made it to where it was impossible to have those thoughts and entertain them, and i am so happy i stayed to this day he still apologizes for ever allowing himself to hurt me, and i know he feels bad  I am still very happy with him

[Junesmommy18]

I've been there, and I left. I have self respect for myself, there is no excuse as to why he cheated.

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

I'm not saying it was easy for me after he cheated, it was hard but I learned a lot about myself through it all. I learned that I didn't NEED him and that I could take care of myself and my children. It has in some ways made me a better person knowing I would have been ok. It has also made he and I stronger, when one person cheats no matter if it's the man or woman it's for a reason and it made me see what was wrong in our marriage. Of course I don't fully trust him, I never did but that had nothing to do with him, I trust NO ONE and never have.

And for the record I am not saying that you should stay with your husband, I'm saying that unless you have been in their shoes you can't tell someone what to do. You can give advice and support but telling them what YOU would do isn't going to change their mind or make them listen. I followed my heart and I know what I did was and is best for me and my family. If I had left we would all be ok by now but I fought for what I wanted and I knew the heart of the man I married, yes he disrespected me and it's been a tough road but to ME it was the right road. Many may disagree or think I'm stupid and I understand that but it's not fair to judge unless you live a day in MY shoes.

[Anonymous]

He cheated, I left. His loss.