It sickens me so many say birth rape is not real! *UPDATE*
So many say that birth rape isn't real. (I don't care what you want to label it! This isn't about the name. It is about the act performed against a woman, against her consent.) Maybe, you haven't read stories about it, I have posted a few links below of examples. A provider does not have automatic right to do whatever they want to a woman's body against her informed consent "so long as the baby makes it okay". That is like saying, "Well, there is no such thing as rape within a marriage. He has had sex with his wife in the past. He should be able to expect her to perform her wifely duty anytime."
http://birthraped.wordpress.com/
http://birthwithoutfearblog.com/2010/12/09/a-license-to-rape/
http://guggiedaly.blogspot.com/2011/08/confession-of-birth-rape-survivor.html
http://www.thefword.org.uk/features/2010/09/its_not_rape_ra
Please understand. I am not saying, "Providers should not examine patients." I am saying, "Providers should seek informed consent (per many hospitals' Patient's Bill of Rights) before they perform a prodecure on a patient."
*UPDATE BELOW*
Here are your rights a pregnant woman. They exist. They are real. What happened to these women violate these rights. Signing a form does not release a provider from adhering to these standards.
http://www.aimsusa.org/ppbr.htm
This is a quote from the ACOG.
"It is important to note the distinction between 'consent' and 'informed consent'. Many physicians, because they do not realize there is a difference, believe they are free from liability if the patient consents to treatment. This is not true. The physician may still be liable if the patient's consent was not informed. In addition, the usual consent obtained by a hospital does not in any way release the physician from his legal duty of obtaining an informed consent from his patient.
"Most courts consider that the patient is 'informed' if the following information is given:
The processes contemplated by the physician as treatment, including whether the treatment is new or unusual.
The risks and hazards of the treatment,
The chances for recovery after treatment.
The necessity of the treatment.
The feasibility of alternative methods of treatment.
"One point on which courts do agree is that explanations must be given in such a way that the patient understands them. A physician cannot claim as a defense that he explained the procedure to the patient when he knew the patient did not understand. The physician has a duty to act with due care under the circumstances; this means he must be sure the patient understands what she is told.
"It should be emphasized that the following reasons are not sufficient to justify failure to inform:
That the patient may prefer not to be told the unpleasant possibilities regarding the treatment.
That full disclosure might suggest infinite dangers to a patient with an active imagination, thereby causing her to refuse treatment.
That the patient, on learning the risks involved, might rationally decline treatment. The right to decline is the specific fundamental right protected by the informed consent doctrine."
The Pregnant Patient has the right to participate in decisions involving her well-being and that of her unborn child, unless there is a clearcut medical emergency that prevents her participation. In addition to the rights set forth in the American Hospital Association's "Patient's Bill of Rights," the Pregnant Patient, because she represents TWO patients rather than one, should be recognized as having the additional rights listed below.
The Pregnant Patient has the right, prior to the administration of any drug or procedure, to be informed by the health professional caring for her of any potential direct or indirect effects, risks or hazards to herself or her unborn or newborn infant which may result from the use of a drug or procedure prescribed for or administered to her during pregnancy, labor, birth or lactation.
The Pregnant Patient has the right, prior to the proposed therapy, to be informed, not only of the benefits, risks and hazards of the proposed therapy but also of known alternative therapy, such as available childbirth education classes which could help to prepare the Pregnant Patient physically and mentally to cope with the discomfort or stress of pregnancy and birth. Such classes have been shown to reduce or eliminate the Pregnant Patient's need for drugs and obstetric intervention and should be offered to her early in her pregnancy in order that she may make a reasoned decisions.
The Pregnant Patient has the right, prior to the administration of any drug, to be informed by the health professional who is prescribing or administering the drug to her that any drug which she receives during pregnancy, labor and birth, no matter how or when the drug is taken or administered, may adversely affect her unborn baby, directly or indirectly, and that there is no drug or chemical which has been proven safe for the unborn child.
The Pregnant Patient has the right if Cesarean birth is anticipated, to be informed prior to the administration of any drug, and preferably prior to her hospitalization, that minimizing her intake of nonessential pre-operative medicine will benefit her baby.
The Pregnant Patient has the right, prior to the administration of a drug or procedure, to be informed of the areas of uncertainty if there is NO properly controlled follow-up research which has established the safety of the drug or procedure with regard to its on the fetus and the later physiological, mental and neurological development of the child. This caution applies to virtually all drugs and the vast majority of obstetric procedures.
The Pregnant Patient has the right, prior to the administration of any drug, to be informed of the brand name and generic name of the drug in order that she may advise the health professional of any past adverse reaction to the drug.
The Pregnant Patient has the right to determine for herself, without pressure from her attendant, whether she will or will not accept the risks inherent in the proposed treatment.
The Pregnant Patient has the right to know the name and qualifications of the individual administering a drug or procedure to her during labor or birth.
The Pregnant Patient has the right to be informed, prior to the administration of any procedure, whether that procedure is being administered to her because a) it is medically indicated, b) it is an elective procedure (for convenience, c) or for teaching purposes or research).
The Pregnant Patient has the right to be accompanied during the stress of labor and birth by someone she cares for, and to whom she looks for emotional comfort and encouragement.
The Pregnant Patient has the right after appropriate medical consultation to choose a position for labor and birth which is least stressful for her and her baby.
The Obstetric Patient has the right to have her baby cared for at her bedside if her baby is normal, and to feed her baby according to her baby's needs rather than according to the hospital regimen.
The Obstetric Patient has the right to be informed in writing of the name of the person who actually delivered her baby and the professional qualifications of that person. This information should also be on the birth certificate.
The Obstetric Patient has the right to be informed if there is any known or indicated aspect of her or her baby's care or condition which may cause her or her baby later difficulty or problems.
The Obstetric Patient has the right to have her and her baby's hospital- medical records complete, accurate and legible and to have their records, including nursing notes, retained by the hospital until the child reaches at least the age of majority, or, alternatively, to have the records offered to her before they are destroyed.
The Obstetric Patient, both during and after her hospital stay, has the right to have access to her complete hospital-medical records, including nursing notes, and to receive a copy upon payment of a reasonable fee and without incurring the expense of retaining an attorney.
It is the obstetric patient and her baby, not the health professional, who must sustain any trauma or injury resulting from the use of a drug or obstetric procedure. The observation of the rights listed above will not only permit the obstetric patient to participate in the decisions involving her and her baby's health care, but will help to protect the health professional and the hospital against litigation arising from resentment or misunderstanding on the part of the mother.
Those "rights" listed in your edit are only suggested guidlines for hospitals that are members of the AHA. They are not laws or rights. Even the AHA says that member hospitals are free to edit, simplify etc.
Um no. If I don't want it, he doesn't get it. I don't have to do a damn thing. It is not my job to put out whenever he asks. A husband can rape a wife. Wife says no man does it anyway...rape.
Quoting oriannawhitney:
I personally don't think a husband can rape his wife... it IS your job as a wife to fulfill your husbands sexual needs. If that's not something you want to do then don't get married.
As a mother I would let the doctor check me as often as needed to make sure my child was okay. I don't see why someone would fight that.
There is also implied consent as well. If the doc walks in and wants to check you for dilation and you don't say anything, but you open your legs, you've basically given nonverbal consent for him to do it. You don't physically have to say yes or no. Your actions said it for you.
Okay. Quick question. What if you consent solely to an internal exam and the provider does more- a membrane sweep, brings out an instrument and breaks you water, etc without tell you or asking for your consent? Is that an appropiate thing for a provider to do (don't mind the term, I really just want to discuss when, or if, at any point a woman reserves the right to say "no".)
Quoting Salsacookies:There is also implied consent as well. If the doc walks in and wants to check you for dilation and you don't say anything, but you open your legs, you've basically given nonverbal consent for him to do it. You don't physically have to say yes or no. Your actions said it for you.
Well, when you get admitted to the hospital, you sign a consent for treatment form which means the doctor's can do anything related to your treatment. You've already consented by signing that form giving the medical staff permission to do whatever they deem is necessary for your treatment.
Quoting louzannalady:Okay. Quick question. What if you consent solely to an internal exam and the provider does more- a membrane sweep, brings out an instrument and breaks you water, etc without tell you or asking for your consent? Is that an appropiate thing for a provider to do (don't mind the term, I really just want to discuss when, or if, at any point a woman reserves the right to say "no".)
Quoting Salsacookies:There is also implied consent as well. If the doc walks in and wants to check you for dilation and you don't say anything, but you open your legs, you've basically given nonverbal consent for him to do it. You don't physically have to say yes or no. Your actions said it for you.
Oh please, you really believe that happened? Propaganda. Could her husband not overpower the doctor? You're killing me. I can tell you this, if I were going through that, you better believe I would have been kicking the shit out of that doctor. I do not believe any of it happened.
Quoting louzannalady:
Did you read the links? The women said no. In one story she said no, so did her husband and doula, the doctor belittled her and kept checking her.
Quoting Anonymous:
I have to wonder what it is women think is going to happen when they go to the doctor when pregnant. I was fully aware that I would be examined. I was also fully aware of what the word no meant and how to say it. If you are not strong enough to stand up for what you want while pregnant, how on earth are you going to be strong enough to have a baby? I am sick of all of the crybaby crap out of all of these young moms who aren't getting their way. Boo freaking hoo.
wanting to sleep with him and having no choice are completely different. a woman has the right to say no if she doesn't want to have sex for any reason and if a man leaves because of that, he's not really a man. i have sex with SO pretty much whenever he wants it, but if there's a time where i'm not feeling it, it doesn't happen and he's ok with it. it's called respect. forcing your gf/DW to have sex with you is not respectful and it's appauling that you support that kind of behavior. there is no "wifely duty" that says i have to put out each and every time.
Quoting oriannawhitney:
... thats part of a marriage. If you don't want to sleep with him then you can't be upset when he steps out. That's my opinion. I wouldn't call it being a slave. When you go to work you have certain duties that are your job just as a wife has certain duties to her husband. It's not like husbands don't have certain duties to their wives too.
Quoting KitT.Kat:Wow. Wow. Just...wow.
I guess I didn't sign the same sex slave contract you did when I got married.
Quoting oriannawhitney:
I personally don't think a husband can rape his wife... it IS your job as a wife to fulfill your husbands sexual needs. If that's not something you want to do then don't get married.
I think my husband's a sociopath
- louzannalady
on Apr. 18, 2012 at 10:15 AM