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I HATE my ss's mother.

Posted by Anonymous
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In November of last year my step son came to live with us. I have to give a little back ground here. My SO and his son's mother were together for a total of 4 years.  SS was 2 when the mom called SO and said "I've met someone and I'm leaving". In the 20 minutes it took him to get home they were gone. He didn't see his son again until 2010. He saw him in August 2010 and again in August 2011.

So now back to November 2011. The mother text my SO and said "Come get him, I can't take care of him anymore". Her life was crumbling around her. Her husband (the man she left SO for) was divorcing her because she is an addict. That left her with nowhere to live, no money, no job, no way to care for her sons. (she has a son with her stbx, also) SO drove 10 hours and picked up his son. He brought him back and we all started making adjustments to our lives. My SO did everything he needed to do, filed appropriate paperwork to get custody, got his son enrolled in school, and continued to pay child support (and the mother gladly accepted the money).

We went to court in March for custody, the mom didn't show, so we had no choice but to get child protective services involved. They are now investigating her for abandonment. We are just waiting on a new court date. We have had home studies done, we have had background checks. The caseworker has talked to the stbx, the mother's mother and the CPS in the state she lives in. No one really knows where she is. She updates on facebook and calls occasionally. She sent nothing for Christmas, nothing for his birthday (he turned 10 last week) and didn't even call on his bday until 9pm, when he was already in bed. She called once in Jan, once in Feb, and once in March. She called once in April, so far, but didn't even talk to him because he was in bed.

The mother hasn't done one single thing to get her life together to have this boy back. She still has no job, no income, and no place to live. I'm so ANGRY at this woman. She has disrupted so many lives. Her stbx had to place an ad in the paper to divorce her. She is out of touch with reality. She blames everyone for the situation she is in except herself. She will not take any responsibility for her actions.

The boy is doing okay. He has his good days and his bad. He misses his family and is confused, angry and hurt by the whole situation. He thinks we are the bad guys and that his mom is awesome. He treats his sister (mine and SO's child) like crap, always making comments about how cool his brother is. He was not taught basic manners and values. He does not respect or take care of his belongings. He was not taught personal responsibility or how to be grateful. I'm trying my best to love this kid but how do I do that when he doesn't want to be loved by me? I'm starting to feel resentful.

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 25, 2012 at 10:15 AM
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