Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

How would you feel if you went to a babyshower and then found out....

Posted by   + Show Post
That this is the girls 4th one for the same baby...so I'm not a huge fan of one of my best friends wives. Him and I have been really close since high-school, so whatever I am nice to her because I know how much he loves her. So I was really excited when I was invited to her baby shower. She was registered at baby R us, and most of the things she picked were very expensive. I ended up spending about 80$ on her gift. So while I'm at the baby shower I over heard someone say " I don't know where she is even going to put all her gift, this is the 4th shower she has had." I casually ask my friend and he said yep, one for family, one for work friends, one for her friends, one for his friends. I was kinda shocked, I have never heard of that before. Also I don't have a lot of money and I wanted to help them out, if I would have known this was her 4th shower I wouldn't have spent so much..but nothing I can do now. How would you have felt?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:07 AM
Replies (71-80):
3xangel
by *Angelicious* on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:43 AM
I understand that and that's why I had 2. But, I didn't expect or ask for gifts from either one of them.

Quoting bluesky51201:

I'm not arguing, I'm just curious. Sometimes its hard to get everyone together and I can't see the difference between 50 people at one shower or 50 spread out over smaller events. I couldn't expect all of my family to fly to Alaska and I couldn't expect my friends to fly to my home state. Sometimes there are circumstances that prevent one huge shower for everyone.




Quoting 3xangel:

How is having 4 baby showers NOT being greedy? <---- don't answer that. I don't feel like going back and forth about it. I think it's being greedy and you don't. Different opinions.





Quoting bluesky51201:

How is it greedy? People choose to throw showers, no one is forced. It seems like each person was only invited to one so its not grabby. I had three showers and felt blessed and loved that so many people wanted to celebrate our baby. Two of them were groups back home that took it upon themselves to have a party and give my baby things even though I couldn't be there.








Quoting 3xangel:

I think that's ridiculous and greedy. I would take the gift back and not go to the baby shower.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MissyMegs
by Bronze Member on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:43 AM


Quoting jnttd:

And for the people saying she's not greedy since she didn't throw the showers herself, I still think that's bullshit. If four different people wanted to throw me showers I would ask if they would mind joining up. I would never have four showers. And there's the issue of "too many guests for one shower". Then gir the list down. You don't need your cousin's best friend's sister at your birthday shower. Have some tact and stop looking for people to buy you gifts.

I personally feel like she should have combined them into two showers, like they did for me. DH's community doesn't really like to leave their home town and his mother was disabled so we had one where he grew up. Then we had another in my hometown so that ky family and friends didn't have to drive to the boonies and sit in the shitty rec hall they threw it in.

In fact, I'm having my second baby and if anyone offers to throw me a shower I'm going to decline because I think it's tasteless to have a shower for your second child.

I threw a baby shower for my first one, but only two people showed up.. So since then I refuse to throw parties. For some reason, I either just have bad luck and pick the wrong times, or the friends I got are too flaky.. Every party I threw no one showed up.

IAMmomtotrips
by Gold Member on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:44 AM
I was given 5 showers or my triplets! (and one of them I was not even in attendance of..) 1. By my church, 2. By my current school. 3. By my former school a huge diaper drive 4. By my friend (I was on bed rest, so they had it at my house and set up mu nursey for me...5. My and my SO's family live in Louisiana, so my family had a grandparents shower where they gave us presents Nd then my mil and fil brought them all to us...if she didn't ask for them, then there is no problem if someone wanted to throw them for her.
3xangel
by *Angelicious* on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:44 AM
Greedy if she's expecting and asking for expensive gifts from each baby shower.

Quoting Anonymous:

Greedy if she threw them herself.....blessed if others threw,them for her



Quoting 3xangel:

You telling your story doesn't change my opinion that 4 baby showers are ridiculous and seems greedy.





Quoting AmyG1976:

so she should of had one with all those ppl at it? would that make a difference in the end nope. lol not greedy you dont ask for showers and beg ppl to attend those throwing them want to do it. I threw my sister one I believe someone else did too I was not upset someone else wanted to give her one instead of all coming to the one I had in fact lol it was less ppl I had to pay to feed and what not.

Quoting 3xangel:

How is having 4 baby showers NOT being greedy? <---- don't answer that. I don't feel like going back and forth about it. I think it's being greedy and you don't. Different opinions.







Quoting bluesky51201:

How is it greedy? People choose to throw showers, no one is forced. It seems like each person was only invited to one so its not grabby. I had three showers and felt blessed and loved that so many people wanted to celebrate our baby. Two of them were groups back home that took it upon themselves to have a party and give my baby things even though I couldn't be there.













Quoting 3xangel:

I think that's ridiculous and greedy. I would take the gift back and not go to the baby shower.





Posted on CafeMom Mobile
La_Vie_en_R0se
by Gold Member on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:45 AM
This:

Quoting LovelyLauren55:

Most people have one and invite all of those people, does it make a difference that she did it separate?
I had two, one for friends from school, and one for family and friends

aj23
by Silver Member on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:45 AM
What's the difference between 25 people at each of the 4 showers and 100 people at one shower? There isn't one so what's the big deal?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
3xangel
by *Angelicious* on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:45 AM
1 mom liked this
That sucks :-(

Quoting MissyMegs:


Quoting jnttd:

And for the people saying she's not greedy since she didn't throw the showers herself, I still think that's bullshit. If four different people wanted to throw me showers I would ask if they would mind joining up. I would never have four showers. And there's the issue of "too many guests for one shower". Then gir the list down. You don't need your cousin's best friend's sister at your birthday shower. Have some tact and stop looking for people to buy you gifts.



I personally feel like she should have combined them into two showers, like they did for me. DH's community doesn't really like to leave their home town and his mother was disabled so we had one where he grew up. Then we had another in my hometown so that ky family and friends didn't have to drive to the boonies and sit in the shitty rec hall they threw it in.



In fact, I'm having my second baby and if anyone offers to throw me a shower I'm going to decline because I think it's tasteless to have a shower for your second child.

I threw a baby shower for my first one, but only two people showed up.. So since then I refuse to throw parties. For some reason, I either just have bad luck and pick the wrong times, or the friends I got are too flaky.. Every party I threw no one showed up.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
RadsMum
by on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:45 AM

Well, personally when I had my son I ended up with 3 showers...2 of them being surprise showers..my dad's family threw me a shower and I was shocked my son's dad's family was not there but then to find out the following day was a surprise shower from them (because we both have LARGE families). And then my work threw me and a co worker a surprise shower...So I had 3 but I didn't WANT three...however had I had it my way, i'd have just had one. 

MissyMegs
by Bronze Member on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:45 AM


Quoting jimi2626:

She asked someone in each group I guess. No one knew about the other showers

Quoting LucyMom08:

Who threw the showers? Did she or friends?

Re-quoting - She asked someone in each group.

ccnstanczak
by Gold Member on Apr. 29, 2012 at 10:45 AM

 i had 2 sort of 3 for my first. one from my sil and my family, a party for after when she was born for my dads side and distant family that i hadnt seen in years!! and then my mom surprised me one morning. i woke up and her dining room was filled with baby stuff so it was just me and her awww!

i see nothing wrong or tacky with having multiple showers, only if the mom to be planned them. showers are to be given.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN