Ok. So back story and I GET that I am going to get some comments of pretty much WTF anyways.. But I have fallen "victim" to being a naive and silly woman and... well... I know that already!! (that was sarcasm)
Anyways, I just got married in Febuary... But in November there were rumors and ONE comfirmed (from him) cheating event. Many people around were saying he was sleeping with multiple people. One person saying these things includes his best friend and our roommate at the time. Well.. I let that go. I forgave him for the one incident (I know.. I get it... Stupid me)
WELL He's been acting in the same a**hole mood he did last time. There was a rumor at his job that he had gotten caught with a girl "making out" but nothing ever came of that. Well I let that go, because he didn't get in trouble so I figured it was false. That I knew of.
Last night I figured out a number in his phone was actually that of this girl that the rumors are flying about (It was under the name Randal). Which even when he was messing around before he still had her number of the right name.
But I spoke to his coworker and she told me that there was more going on that the HAD been caught and had the schedules split up so they weren't working together and that when I was gone for a funeral that they were messing around and in plain sight and he didn't even care. Most of the people up at work didn't even know he was married..
So... Since this has gone on before... And I was stupid and didn't listen THEN... would you believe someone you barely know, or your husband that says he isn't messing around with this girl?
I understand I have been naive and turned a blind eye too many times. I just hate to be wrong and be accusing my husband of something he is ACTUALLY innocent of.
He is also not working at the job where this girl is anymore. I spoke to them last week because he did end up losing his job (unrelated circumstances) would it be innappropriate to go up there and ask them if those two WERE really seperated for that reason? I don't know what to go nosing where I don't belong. Please let me know what you would do.
I love him, but I am fed up with being treated like shit. We should have never gotten married... But... well I did... But what to do now? Would you give up on something thats still supposed to be new and in the thrill stage or would you automatically react and kick him on his ass and throw away the rest of the relationship?
*edited for content* thank you
Shortly after posting this, my little sister was driving by the house (I was at work) and the car was there. He SAID he was on his way to another town and then to my parent's house. My sister knew all of the rumors and everything.. So I told her to stop in with the pretense of picking something up. Well the sh* hit the fan.. And my BIL broke down my bedroom door (didn't exactly want that lol) hubby wasn't caught exactly in the act like I originally thought. But just before, where he was naked and the nasty girl not quite.
That was Sunday.
Since then he has been trying to make amends. I have been staying with my parent's, because its really the only place I could go. He has been at the house just because I didn't want to stay there and sleep on that bed and I haven't told him to leave yet. He SAYS he wants to be better, that this time he really wants to change.. That he wasn't thinking and had a lot of emotional crap going on. Even went as far as saying he didn't want to have sex with me because I had just lost a family member a little more than a week ago (yeah.. Because losing an important part of the family and a husband in less than 3 weeks makes it soooo better) He said that he has wanted to talk to me but didn't know how for a while about what was going on with him. All of this stuff is fine and dandy... But doesn't change the fact that a nasty whore was about to lay down on my bed and expose her nastiness to the world.
Also, he says this was the only time... But aside from the rest above, I also found "sexy" photos on his phone with messages from her like "baby, do you like this?" and some other nasty junk. I asked her myself and she said more than once.. But he denies it and says that was the ONLY time something has happened.. I believe him as much as I believe that you can "accidently cheat"
Sorry so long.