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I think I am failing as a mother

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I am divorced and raising 4 kids all by myself. They never see their dad. Its just me. I run an in home daycare so that I am able to stay home but still make money. I admit that I am very busy with all the kids here (I watch 3 kids plus my youngest who is 2 then my older kids after school) and don't have a lot of quiet time for homework, etc. Homework ends up being done later after dinner and I spend so much time with my one child who is struggling that I forget to check my other kids work, etc.

Well progress reports came home Friday and my one son's was bad. Getting F's and D's and it says his homework isn't being completed and its being turned in late. My oldest has straight A's (thank god) but I feel I am failing my younger two. How can I spend equal amount of time with the younger two who are struggling? I'm here alone. Its hard. It would be so much easier if I had a husband hers to help.

I just needed to vent. I feel like I am failing. Ugh.
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:16 AM
Replies (31-39):
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:31 PM


by Emerald Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:58 PM

 The only thing that I can suggest is that you should have a part-time assistant come in during the after school hours. Perhaps go into your local colleges and see if the education dept. has any students that need some internship hours. Interns will work for free for their college credits. Just throw in an "after school" snack for them too. Lol.

I did in home child care as well for a few years and I did an internship with an autistic child during college.

by Bigby Wolf on Apr. 30, 2012 at 5:45 PM

You could try having them all set at the same table while they do homework that way you can help all of them. Your oldest might be able to help the youngest since he/she has already done the work.

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 6:09 PM

Just because things aren't perfect, doesn't mean you are failing. Do you have a friend or relitive that could help out even once or twice a week. Even if its just someone to make dinner while you work  on homework. Or help with house work. It maybe a rough patch but its ok. try getting your oldest to help with homework with the little ones.

Also getting either a big calendar or a white board that you stick on the wall will help keep track of dates, homework and tests

by Ruby Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 6:13 PM

Maybe you can make a day just for one of your kids and then another day for the other. You spend the day doing what your kid wants to do on his or her day. That might make them feel they have more of you. I know it will be harder on you, but just remember childhood isn't forever.

by Queen Bee on Apr. 30, 2012 at 6:23 PM


by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 7:03 PM

 You think you're failing?!! You're doing more than most can do. Mother's Day was meant for mother's like yourself. You are not failing them. My sister, and I hate to admit this, LOL was the 'teacher' at home assigned by my mom a mother of five. Your straight A student could tutor the little ones where they are having trouble. My sister loved this idea because she was always a straight A student and gifted. Talk/contact their teachers and find out where is it that they need to focus on and what is it that they recommend. Some schools offer early and/or afterschool enrichment classes that are free where they can help your children with the areas they're struggling with. Other schools have early intervention programs as well.

You're a dedicated mom and my hat goes off to you  bow down


by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:15 PM

The responses so far all assume that he is having academic problems.  Is it possible that the is not doing his homework to get attention?  You obviously have your hands full. I'm not sure how long you've been divorced, but he may be having difficulty adjusting. .... Just a thought to consider.

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 11:41 PM


You're not failing honey! I think a schedule would be good to follow since there's so much to do. At least with a schedule you know where you headed. Do a schedule and hang on a wall. As soon as you kids come home from school...follow that schedule and make sure the Day Care kids are busy.

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