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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

If you think spanking is abuse

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Do you actually do anything to stop it?

I hear all the time "Oh I dont spank my child because it is abuse"

So if you see me spanking mine, why dont you do anything about it? I bet if i slapped my child across her face you would step in wouldnt you? I think you KNOW its not really abuse, you just dont like it, dont do it, and feel you have to look down on moms who do.

Posted by Anonymous on May. 1, 2012 at 11:17 AM
Replies (31-40):
Danita42
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:04 PM
Quoting kristyann:

I don't think spanking is abuse, I also think it is not a form of parenting that I would ever use.


This and as long as its open handed.
CafeMom Tickers
redneckmama4
by Loree on May. 1, 2012 at 12:05 PM

I never said our children were angels. But I'll be damned if they'll pester strangers in public. It's rude and disrespectful!

Quoting Anonymous:

lol ok, sorry not everyone's kids are perfect little angels like yours.

Quoting redneckmama4:

No, that behavior leads me to believe spankin' doesn't work or somethin' else is up.

Quoting Anonymous:

wow really? you hear of hyper kids and automatically assume they are revved up on sugar? *rolls eyes*

Quoting redneckmama4:

Cut out the sugar???

Quoting Anonymous:

SOME*

what works for me may not work for you. doesn't mean im abusive. i have very rambunctious kids who cant seem to keep their hands off things, and think they must dance and flail and run into people the whole time. telling them to just stop doesnt work.

Quoting redneckmama4:

Some kids follow rules in public without *swats* or bein' hit.

Quoting Anonymous:

follow me all you want. just because we are in public doesnt mean they can get away with whatever "because mommy wont spank us". I'll spank at home and i'll spank at the store. 

Quoting redneckmama4:

I have followed a mother and child to the bathroom when I was 18 (before I ever had kids) as I could feel a whoopin' comin' on. The child didn't get one.

I won't say anything as I don't like confrontation and if you're hittin' your child in public, chances are if I say somethin'...we's gonna go rounds.

But I have been known to give my hairy eye and shake my head. I also feel sorry for the children because if parents do it in public, what happens at home?

Hittin' is aggressive and physical to me and I will always see it as abuse.









Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 1, 2012 at 12:05 PM

that wouldnt stop someone who spanks in public, because its NOT abuse, or it would be ILLEGAL

Quoting MrCruzito:

The problem is the degree or intensity of spanking.  Mentally I think any form of Physical punishment is risky.  However I know some parents that claim to be "spankers" and they give the lightest little love taps, my time outs are more effective than that.  Other parents are firmer but on the bottom only, maybe causing tears, this I think is when we begin to risk the childs mental health.  Then it just get meaner and meaner.

If I saw you perform a spanking that warranted it, I would walk right up to you and tell you to stop.  I have never seen anyone strike their kid in public.  Because they know its abuse.   I do look down on moms that do it.  I feel it is a lazy, careless, risky form of parenting.  The most popular reason for spanking is, "My parents spanked me and im fine."...I feel that is an incredibly weak arguement for pro spanking.  That is one of maybe 2 reasons i've ever heard to justify spanking. 

We have evolved people, we are more educated, studies have been done the data has been read, the proof is in the pudding.  Read a book, I have yet to read a parenting book that promotes spanking your kid.  The most famous pediatrician/father that walked the earth wrote his book like 60+ years ago and even HE new spankings were unhealthy, im talking about Dr. Spock. 

Thank You



tansyflower
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:08 PM
1 mom liked this

i keep my nose out of other peoples business...but i did make a huge stink and report a spanking group on here and got it removed from cm.  those woman were sick fucks who wanted pics of you spanking your kids without their clothes on and wanted you to tell stories about how red you could get your kids ass and how much you enjoyed it....it was NOT normal spanking.  definitely a sick fetish and i hope those woman get their kids taken away for child abuse :(

LectioDivina
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:10 PM
1 mom liked this

Actually that's the way almost every mammal on the planet raises their children.  Taking nature out of raising children is not an answer to me....

No, I only spank my children when the consequence of their actions would be too much to bear if they did it again. There's a lot of things that result in death if a child tries it again. ( sticking metal in an outlet, wrapping cords around their neck, running out into traffic)

And they need to learn that consequence to hitting because they will enter middle school, high school one day when someone might try to hit them or they might try to hit someone else. They need to know how to handle themselves when that happens.

Quoting Mrs.Worthen:

...so you only spank your kid when he/she hits you?


ETA: It still sounds stupid to me. Why would you show your kids what people who dont love them do? you cant expect them to differenciate between you or anyone else hitting them other than the fact that you are supposed to be their mother, protector, and care for them. I've never heard of a mother who wants to harm their child. even if its in a "lesser" form and even if its to teach them something... that sounds completely screwy


ETA2: regardless, you go ahead and hit your kid. I'll teach my how he is SUPPOSED to act.

Quoting LectioDivina:

It actually makes a lot more sense than you'd think...

Kids learn action = equal and opposite reaction.

In the real world, if they hit someone, they will get hit back. sad fact.

The point of a spanking is to be a much lessened yet true consequence of what would happen if they acted that way with someone who does not love them.

Quoting Mrs.Worthen:

i dont think its abuse, i just think its stupid to teach your kid not to hit and them turn around and spank them..

pretty crappy example setting IMO

but i dont bother other people, they can parent how they want.




Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on May. 1, 2012 at 12:11 PM
I am not anti-spanking but only do it on rare occasion. Honestly, time outs work very well. My son hates timeouts and he cries as if I spanked him. He doesn't like being taken away from fun. All kids are different though. To each their own.
MomNtheRes
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:12 PM
3 moms liked this

All too often those who are abused have a pretty front put on in public, only to have the shit beat out of them behind closed doors. Generally those who spank in public don't fear hiding anything and feel justified in punishing their child appropriately. 

I've spanked my child in public, and you following me to the bathroom wouldn't have stopped me. Although the difference is, I wouldn't have taken her to the bathroom. If she is bold enough to disobey that baldy in public, then she is bold enough to get her butt whooped in public. 

Quoting redneckmama4:

I have followed a mother and child to the bathroom when I was 18 (before I ever had kids) as I could feel a whoopin' comin' on. The child didn't get one.

I won't say anything as I don't like confrontation and if you're hittin' your child in public, chances are if I say somethin'...we's gonna go rounds.

But I have been known to give my hairy eye and shake my head. I also feel sorry for the children because if parents do it in public, what happens at home?

Hittin' is aggressive and physical to me and I will always see it as abuse.


EmilyMarshall
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:13 PM
I dont think its abuse


DixieL
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2012 at 12:13 PM

I don't belive spanking is abuse, as long as it is done the right way. Slapping them in the face, hitting their legs hard with a belt or a switch. I think that is abusive. Spanking them on the bottom is not at all abusive. I think a lot more moms spank their kids than they admit. My son was missing one time It  was raining outside he was very young and he didn't come home from school. We were scared to death. My mom was at our house too. He finally came home. As it turned out he was at a friends house in our building playing. My mom had me turn him over my knee, so he would think I was spanking him. She used her hand and swatted him on the leg. He started crying and it broke my heart. Even though I knew he deserved it I couldn't stand seeing my son hurt in any way. He knew all along it was grandma, because when I ever tried to spank him it never hurt and he would laugh. That's what he told me

praisinghim2day
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:13 PM
1 mom liked this

same

Quoting Anonymous:

I dont think its abuse at all. My mom spanked me when I was bad and I turned out just fine.


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