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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Before simply reading the first few lines and then jumping right into the conversation read what I have typed in red and underlined for a better understanding of the topic at hand.  It is all fine and dandy to jump to conclusions and go off the introduction to a thread but a deeper perspective goes a long way.

 

While I was sitting in the hospital yesterday waiting for DH to finish his radiation treatment, lab work and talking to his chemo doctor I did what I usually do, people watch. 

Now before I start I will say that I was wearing a pair of jeans, a black quarter sleeve top and a pair of Merril fast packing boots, nothing dressy or special, my normal every day wear.

As I was looking around I noticed how many people were dressed rather sloppily.  Men with ill fitting pants and shirts (yes I consider baggy pants and t shirt 2 sizes too big ill fitting and sloppy) and women in the equivolent of pajama pants and t-shirts. 

Of course I reminded myself that I was in a hospital where many people come because they are sick and not feeling their best and probably not up for dressing their best but it did make me wonder.  What ever happened to looking your best?  In my opinion the way you dress not only shows respect to those around you but also to yourself.  Now, I am not calling for the days when women wore only dresses and men walked around in tailored suits but I do wonder why it is so hard to put on well fitting, nice clothes such as a pair of clean jeans and a nice top. 

For reference, this IMO is sloppy

This is well dressed

 

Now of course I realize that tastes vary and not everyone will agree what is and is not fashionable so these pics are only examples.  But tell me why, why do some people insist on dressing decently when the leave their home?  No matter how tired I am I always ensure that my apperance is neat and clean and does DH. It shows that we respect ourselves and those around us. 

 

 

Edited to bold, highlight, italicize and underline that I realized I was in the hospital for those judging me because they didn't read the entire post.

Some will die in hot pursuit and fiery auto crashes. Some will die in hot pursuit while sifting through my ashes. Some will fall in love with life and drink it from a fountain that is pouring like an avalanche coming down the mountain. ~Butthole Surfers



 

by on May. 2, 2012 at 8:25 AM
Replies (241-250):
SDarvasi
by Sarah Berri ♥ on May. 2, 2012 at 11:32 AM
1 mom liked this

That's different. But alot of those people are criminals, so what do they care anyways?

But other people at court..yes I agree...they should dress a little more appropriately. There is a time and place for everything, I guess. But grocery shopping, being out in public and hospital visits should not be included in the closed minded expectations of "properly dressed so that others can be rest assured that one has respect for themselves by the fit of their clothes and their personal appearance,"

Quoting BrittBurke:

Amen to that. I say this all the time. I went to COURT in March..I wore a dress, I brought my father, who was in a suit. We were mistaken as attorneys because we were the only people who were dressed appropriately. There were people in stained sweatpants and pajama pants and the like. I was absolutely disgusted. How do these people expect to be taken seriously when they come to a courthouse looking like that?


Playitagain
by on May. 2, 2012 at 11:36 AM
1 mom liked this
when I go to court for clients, I always give them a dresscode, if they aren't dressed in it I tell them I will do my best but not to expect much. I can never believe the clothing I've seen people were to probate court, (so mostly normal people) one women wanting her kids back from her mom wore scrubs, the judge asked her if she was a nurse and she said no. He asked her what she did and it was fast food or something. Asked why she was wearing scrubs in his court and she said she wore what was comfy and it shouldn't matter. He shook his head and told her it did matter because it showed who she was too him, a stranger deciding her kids fates. Grandma who showed up in a pant suit, with the grandkids all preteens dressed in suits and a dress, guess who got to keep the kids. Stuff like that blows my mind. In school we were all taught to always, walk, talk, dress, and act with respect of others and the status of the courts.

Quoting BrittBurke:

Amen to that. I say this all the time. I went to COURT in March..I wore a dress, I brought my father, who was in a suit. We were mistaken as attorneys because we were the only people who were dressed appropriately. There were people in stained sweatpants and pajama pants and the like. I was absolutely disgusted. How do these people expect to be taken seriously when they come to a courthouse looking like that?



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Supervane
by Ruby Member on May. 2, 2012 at 11:38 AM
2 moms liked this
I was raised to wear decent clothes in public. I have never left the house in pjs, and even though casual I'll be dressed for the day and my hair will be done. I get dressed going out or not even if its just to clean the house. I'm often in some sort of maxi Dress or Jersey knit cotton dress. I don't even own t shirts
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bluespagan
by on May. 2, 2012 at 11:40 AM
1 mom liked this

Thank you for this post.  Yes this was an example set in court but it applies to every day life as well.  But all people here seem to notice is where I was sitting as I was waiting and thinking about things other than the one thing I constantly stress and worry about when I bring DH in for treatments.

Quoting Playitagain:

when I go to court for clients, I always give them a dresscode, if they aren't dressed in it I tell them I will do my best but not to expect much. I can never believe the clothing I've seen people were to probate court, (so mostly normal people) one women wanting her kids back from her mom wore scrubs, the judge asked her if she was a nurse and she said no. He asked her what she did and it was fast food or something. Asked why she was wearing scrubs in his court and she said she wore what was comfy and it shouldn't matter. He shook his head and told her it did matter because it showed who she was too him, a stranger deciding her kids fates. Grandma who showed up in a pant suit, with the grandkids all preteens dressed in suits and a dress, guess who got to keep the kids. Stuff like that blows my mind. In school we were all taught to always, walk, talk, dress, and act with respect of others and the status of the courts.

Quoting BrittBurke:

Amen to that. I say this all the time. I went to COURT in March..I wore a dress, I brought my father, who was in a suit. We were mistaken as attorneys because we were the only people who were dressed appropriately. There were people in stained sweatpants and pajama pants and the like. I was absolutely disgusted. How do these people expect to be taken seriously when they come to a courthouse looking like that?




Anonymous
by Anonymous 31 on May. 2, 2012 at 11:43 AM
Lets get real here. Most ppl dress that way on a normal basis,not just when they are sick. Thats the sad part


Quoting couponluv72:

you have got to be kidding? people who are ill and getting treatment, the last thing likely on their mind is wether their clothes are sloppy or not. WTF?

Quoting bluespagan:

While I was sitting in the hospital yesterday waiting for DH to finish his radiation treatment, lab work and talking to his chemo doctor I did what I usually do, people watch. 


Now before I start I will say that I was wearing a pair of jeans, a black quarter sleeve top and a pair of Merril fast packing boots, nothing dressy or special, my normal every day wear.


As I was looking around I noticed how many people were dressed rather sloppily.  Men with ill fitting pants and shirts (yes I consider baggy pants and t shirt 2 sizes too big ill fitting and sloppy) and women in the equivolent of pajama pants and t-shirts. 


Of course I reminded myself that I was in a hospital where many people come because they are sick and not feeling their best and probably not up for dressing their best but it did make me wonder.  What ever happened to looking your best?  In my opinion the way you dress not only shows respect to those around you but also to yourself.  Now, I am not calling for the days when women wore only dresses and men walked around in tailored suits but I do wonder why it is so hard to put on well fitting, nice clothes such as a pair of clean jeans and a nice top. 


For reference, this IMO is sloppy






Now of course I realize that tastes vary and not everyone will agree what is and is not fashionable so these pics are only examples.  But tell me why, why do some people insist on dressing decently when the leave their home?  No matter how tired I am I always ensure that my apperance is neat and clean and does DH. It shows that we respect ourselves and those around us. 



ChrissyReznor
by Platinum Member on May. 2, 2012 at 11:43 AM

because as u put it,i don't respect other people or myself.basically exactly what u wrote.see you're right!!

areles
by Platinum Member on May. 2, 2012 at 11:44 AM
Here's an idea, one that I anticipate you will not be able to grasp even as the remotest possibility, so sure are you in your belief that you exist primarily to tell the rest of us how we should think and live, but:

How about you worry about your first impressions, and let others' worry about theirs?

If someone's sloppily dressed and you make a judgment call that you wouldn't want to know them as a result, yay. There's someone you know to avoid lest their laziness and sloppiness reflect poorly on you, and the sloppily dressed person narrowly escaped meeting a know-it-all, judgmental harpy. I kinda view that as a win win, myself.

Btw, I'm about to go have an ultrasound to confirm the fibroids my doctor found Monday. I'm soaking three pads an hour, and have been for four days. My uterus is so enlarged that I'm bloated from it. What should I wear?




Quoting bluespagan:

Oh FFS. 


Honestly, if I were to see her mother out and about then yes I would not think as highly of her as I would if her jeans were not torn and she were wearing a nice shirt.  Honestly, how you take care of yourself goes beyond the simple getting up and brushing your teeth.  You clothes affect how you feel, how others perceive you and how others react to you.  It is the first impresison that you give to people. 


Quoting areles:

Uh, it's NOT her personal decision. If your mom isn't wearing boring khakis and a blazer, she's disrespecting those unfortunate enough to lay eyes on her. Duh. Didn't bluespagan and jessi2girls EXPLAIN this to you already? What aren't you getting?

Hopefully they'll return in short order, armed with their soapbox and fresh links to psychological studies.



Quoting SDarvasi:


My mom has NEVER cared what she wears. Sometimes her clothes have holes. Sometimes they don't match. She's even rocked (wait for it....) *GASP* TIE DYED outfits and socks to match!!! Her hair is always all over the map..it's kind of wirery and straw like. SHe doesn't dye it, or wear make up. And sometimes doesnt wear a bra. But do you know what??


She DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT WHAT ANYONE THINKS. Because no matter what she wears...her CLOTHES SHOULDN'T DEFINE HER as a person.


She is still the most friendly, down to earth, giving, animal loving, INTELLIGENT, open minded and honest person I have EVER had the pleasure of knowing in my life.


SO, fuck what you, or any other small minded individual thinks about how clothes make the person. SURE, if you're going for that top knotch office job or executive position, dress nice.


But day to day life? What someone wishes to wear is their OWN personal decision. 


 



.


 





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SDarvasi
by Sarah Berri ♥ on May. 2, 2012 at 11:44 AM

That's because you TOLD us about it!!!! If you wanted a more generic response from people...you should have just plainly stated "I dress well. I don't understand why other people don't and it drives me crazy to think people don't care about how they look but that's just me".

YOU chose to use the hospital as your example, all the while "kindly" explaining that you understand WHY they wouldn't want to dress up but it still bothers you.

so YOU brought it on yourself.


Get a clue. Really.

Quoting bluespagan:

Thank you for this post.  Yes this was an example set in court but it applies to every day life as well.  But all people here seem to notice is where I was sitting as I was waiting and thinking about things other than the one thing I constantly stress and worry about when I bring DH in for treatments.

Quoting Playitagain:

when I go to court for clients, I always give them a dresscode, if they aren't dressed in it I tell them I will do my best but not to expect much. I can never believe the clothing I've seen people were to probate court, (so mostly normal people) one women wanting her kids back from her mom wore scrubs, the judge asked her if she was a nurse and she said no. He asked her what she did and it was fast food or something. Asked why she was wearing scrubs in his court and she said she wore what was comfy and it shouldn't matter. He shook his head and told her it did matter because it showed who she was too him, a stranger deciding her kids fates. Grandma who showed up in a pant suit, with the grandkids all preteens dressed in suits and a dress, guess who got to keep the kids. Stuff like that blows my mind. In school we were all taught to always, walk, talk, dress, and act with respect of others and the status of the courts.

Quoting BrittBurke:

Amen to that. I say this all the time. I went to COURT in March..I wore a dress, I brought my father, who was in a suit. We were mistaken as attorneys because we were the only people who were dressed appropriately. There were people in stained sweatpants and pajama pants and the like. I was absolutely disgusted. How do these people expect to be taken seriously when they come to a courthouse looking like that?





bluespagan
by on May. 2, 2012 at 11:44 AM

Sarcasm aside why do you dress the way you do?

Quoting ChrissyReznor:

because as u put it,i don't respect other people or myself.basically exactly what u wrote.see you're right!!


Anonymous
by Anonymous 31 on May. 2, 2012 at 11:45 AM
Completly agree w you


Quoting AllieReed:

I'm not even referring to the treatment part, but these days many people just don't care anymore.

It's sad to me


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