So I am a terrible housewife. There, I said it. I hate doing laundry and dishes and just about any other "chore". The thing is, I REALLY, REALLY want to be "that" good wife and mother... you know, the wives who are simply perfect in every way. Their husbands really cherish them, and their kids respect them. They find time to work out, keep polished, clean the whole house, play with and educate the children, healthfully prepare each and every meal from scratch, have "Mommy time", and still manage to get enough "beauty sleep". How do they do it? Not to mention, they genuinely seem very happy. I want that soooooo badly. I just can't seem to stick to any schedule I make for my self. I am utterly disgusted with my self, and I know my husband is un happy. He deserves so much better. He busts his ass at the firm all day, sometimes six days a week, and sometimes when he gets home he has to pick up, and I walk around frustrated at him for being frustrated that he has to clean... um OF COURSE HE'S UPSET! ughhh... I know I just need to kick my self in the ass and get the shit done, period. I just want to know how the hell you get it done happily? Gracefully? Besides the obvious, "oh, I'm doing it for my family, and that makes me happy to do it'... blah blah blah... I mean really... How the heck do you all do it? I need your secrets asap. Please, my family is falling apart.
* UPDATE ON PAGE 3, thanks ladies! :)
Make a realistic goal list. Do one task at a time, like keep the laundry up all week. Once you get that down , keep up the mess all week, like pick up toys and make beds . Once you get the hang of that move on to cooking,make the menu for one week. It all takes practice . Get a positive out look,(not easy) challenge yourself.
Have you ever worked? Look at it like a job if you have to. Every morning from say 9am to 11am to housework. Start a load of clothes when you start, and do another when those are done (and put them away). Focus on one room or main chore a day and them pick up the rest of the house daily during this time.
Make sure to clean up as you go. Do dishes after every meal and put cups ect in the dishawasher as you use them.
If you keep your house picked up in the first place it never really gets that dirty and overwhelming kwim?
Break up the things you need to get done. Like laundry if you don't like doing it then do a load every morning when you get up. It isn't a weeks worth in one day its a little at a time. Dishes a quick wash after each meal. Sweep the kitchen floor while the LOs eat.
Once you figure out the fastest way to get things done the easier it becomes.
Thank you so much ladies! I was so scared I was going to be burned at the stake, but I had to ask for help. My family deserves the best, and I'm not an idiot, so, it's time to buckle down. I really like thinking of it as a job! Then maybe there will be an "off" time... baaahaaaahaaaahaaaaa!!! One can hope, right!?
Make a priority list. Then pick the top thing and work on it till you're good at it. You can dabble in the rest but get the first thing on the list down. When you have that down start perfecting the second thing on the list. So on and so forth. Remind yourself your man works hard so you should too.
Example list:
- Breakfast before he goes to work (sends him off with a happy feeling)
- Laundry, washed/dry/hung/folded
- Living area picked up (even if you don't get the bedrooms and such clean the living area should be)
- Dinner when he gets home (let him sit down and enjoy family time, don't make the first task picking up)
- Dishes/Kitchen tidied (makes it easier to cook breakfast and dinner)
- etc
Start out treating the house like a part-time job; 2-3hrs a day 3-4 days a week. As you get more into a habit it'll become a subconscious effort.
What makes you think that kind of person you describe, that you see and want to be are happy themselves?
How do you know if their husbands are really happy with them?
You know what I learned? That women that you described seem that way because they want people to believe they have the perfect life, perfect marriage, they are perfect. When in reality it's a chaotic home and marriage and they look that good because they spend time MOSTLY on themselves, being selfish and controlling. I have a few friends that way.
Just do your best and do it lil by lil, but don't go for perfection. Go for better than you are now and you will feel better about everything you want. There is no such thing as perfection.
Quoting MynameisMummy:Thank you so much ladies! I was so scared I was going to be burned at the stake, but I had to ask for help. My family deserves the best, and I'm not an idiot, so, it's time to buckle down. I really like thinking of it as a job! Then maybe there will be an "off" time... baaahaaaahaaaahaaaaa!!! One can hope, right!?
At what age should I tell my son dh is not his bio dad?
- MynameisMummy
on May. 3, 2012 at 9:31 AM