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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I don't understand this

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 24 Replies

My MIL has been at the same job for about 10 years. Yet, she is always low on money. I don't understand why she can't budget out her bills? I'd mind my own business, but it affects us because she has to ask for money so that her 16 year old daughter gets her basic needs met. Now that my SIL is older she is looking for a job, but now we all fear that my SIL is just going to be another person that my MIL will mooch off of for the rest of her life.

I just don't understand. She knows how much she is going to make each month. Why can't she set a budget to that? I'd understand more if she had just lost her job, or had a crisis, but I mean come on. Same job for 10 years and she can't make basic needs? Ugh.

Posted by Anonymous on May. 9, 2012 at 9:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
AlwaysExpecting
by Member on May. 9, 2012 at 9:47 AM
1 mom liked this

She either doesnt make enough where she works to support her bills OR she is living beyond her means to provide, meaning she is creating too many unnecesary bills. For example, does she pay for internet, cable, etc? She might not see those things as above her means or extravagant, but she may realistically not be able to afford to have them. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 9, 2012 at 9:50 AM
She obviously doesnt make enough to cover her bills.... and until people quit helping her, she wont HAVE to budget within her means.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 9, 2012 at 9:52 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

She obviously doesnt make enough to cover her bills.... and until people quit helping her, she wont HAVE to budget within her means.

She smokes and drinks a lot. Which I think is where all of her money is going. My SIL has gained a ton of weight because where they live, the stove doesn't work, so they are constantly eating out. I'd love to just cut her off, but my husband won't let his little sister go without clothes or heat.

LovelyJay512
by Platinum Member on May. 9, 2012 at 9:53 AM
That's your answer dear. That's sad

Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

She obviously doesnt make enough to cover her bills.... and until people quit helping her, she wont HAVE to budget within her means.

She smokes and drinks a lot. Which I think is where all of her money is going. My SIL has gained a ton of weight because where they live, the stove doesn't work, so they are constantly eating out. I'd love to just cut her off, but my husband won't let his little sister go without clothes or heat.

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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 9, 2012 at 9:54 AM

I love that my husband is so willing to help out his family, but at the same time we can't keep forking over money. We have to make ourselves seem worse off than we are, so she doesn't bother us so much for money. :(

Quoting LovelyJay512:

That's your answer dear. That's sad

Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

She obviously doesnt make enough to cover her bills.... and until people quit helping her, she wont HAVE to budget within her means.

She smokes and drinks a lot. Which I think is where all of her money is going. My SIL has gained a ton of weight because where they live, the stove doesn't work, so they are constantly eating out. I'd love to just cut her off, but my husband won't let his little sister go without clothes or heat.


hplesha
by Gold Member on May. 9, 2012 at 9:55 AM
1 mom liked this
Go buy her a used stove and scrap the old one. Then they can all cook at home instead of eating crap for meals

Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

She obviously doesnt make enough to cover her bills.... and until people quit helping her, she wont HAVE to budget within her means.

She smokes and drinks a lot. Which I think is where all of her money is going. My SIL has gained a ton of weight because where they live, the stove doesn't work, so they are constantly eating out. I'd love to just cut her off, but my husband won't let his little sister go without clothes or heat.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LovelyJay512
by Platinum Member on May. 9, 2012 at 9:56 AM
I totally understand. Try to kick some sense into him!

Quoting Anonymous:

I love that my husband is so willing to help out his family, but at the same time we can't keep forking over money. We have to make ourselves seem worse off than we are, so she doesn't bother us so much for money. :(


Quoting LovelyJay512:

That's your answer dear. That's sad



Quoting Anonymous:




Quoting Anonymous:

She obviously doesnt make enough to cover her bills.... and until people quit helping her, she wont HAVE to budget within her means.

She smokes and drinks a lot. Which I think is where all of her money is going. My SIL has gained a ton of weight because where they live, the stove doesn't work, so they are constantly eating out. I'd love to just cut her off, but my husband won't let his little sister go without clothes or heat.


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momoftwo0406
by Ruby Member on May. 9, 2012 at 9:57 AM
Maybe the SIL should come stay with you guys while MIL learns how to be a responsible adult?? Just a idea if you keep giving her money she won't learn. Don't ever give her cash if she needs a bill paid then go pay it yourself if you must help. Just don't give her cash makes it to easy for her to buy booze instead of getting what she needs
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 9, 2012 at 9:57 AM

I think she needs to call her landlord and complain until he fixes it or gets them a new one.

Quoting hplesha:

Go buy her a used stove and scrap the old one. Then they can all cook at home instead of eating crap for meals

Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

She obviously doesnt make enough to cover her bills.... and until people quit helping her, she wont HAVE to budget within her means.

She smokes and drinks a lot. Which I think is where all of her money is going. My SIL has gained a ton of weight because where they live, the stove doesn't work, so they are constantly eating out. I'd love to just cut her off, but my husband won't let his little sister go without clothes or heat.


cnash81
by on May. 9, 2012 at 9:57 AM

My former in-laws were just like this.  They lived beyond their means and would mooch off of their kids.  When my SIL was 16, they forced her to drop out of high school and work full time.  Then, come payday, she had to hand it all over to them.  They have four grown children who all have jobs and never pushed any of them to move out because they could keep getting money from them.  To my knowledge, their 28 yr. old son still lives with them and pays a good portion of their bills.  You have to stop enabling her or she will keep doing it.

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