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I just told my bf to choose. *update in OP*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

UPDATE: So His mom got the e-mail and texted him basically being a bitch about it calling me hateful and disrespectful etc and telling him "good luck in life, with that woman  you're going to need it". He e-mailed her telling her that he had "okayed" me to send the e-mail and that he had agreed with what I said. He defended me and said that if she had simply apologized to me and been a nice person to me none of this would have happened and that it was her fault, not mine and that as his partner it's my job to protect me and stand by me. They e-mailed back and forth a few times with her being a psycho-bitch and him coming to my defense and not buying the crap she was dishing out.He even called her out on some stuff that didn't have to do with me and at the end she said he was hateful and disrespectful and not to e-mail her back. After the e-mails he is fine with her not being in his life. She finally pushed him to his limits. We are happy together and having her gone just means less drama. We were sitting at my parent's house today with my family and the kids there and we were snuggling outside watching everyone play and he looked so happy and smiled at me and said "this is my heaven." I know that he and I will be fine even though we had to cut those two toxic people out of our lives. So say what you will but we're going to be fine.

 My bf has bought me a ring and wants to propose.  I tried to get along with his mom and his sister at first but they are just horrible people that I don't want to be a part of my life or my family. So basically I said that If he wants to be with me then he needs to cut them 95% out of his life. Basically no taking time away from me or our family to go see them or talk to them, no talking about anything going on in our lives with them, no spending holidays with them, not even mothers day. He still has his stepmom and his brothers and sister on his dad's side. He still has his grandparents and aunts and uncles and nieces and nephews on that side. I just want him to have bare minimum communication with his mom and his one sister.  He has agreed to that and she will be finding out shortly because I wrote her an e-mail stating how things are going to be and why. Shit is gona hit the fan when she reads it. Honestly, I do not usually have trouble getting along with people, even in-laws. I got along with my ex- in laws very well, even my ex husband and I are good friends. It's just these women are terrible. So anyway... We'll see what happens when she reads the e-mail. I just can't decided if I'm going to let them come to the wedding or not.

Posted by Anonymous on May. 9, 2012 at 12:48 PM
Replies (211-220):
Aislinn
by on May. 13, 2012 at 9:34 AM
1 mom liked this


Quoting Mom2twosweeties:

5 years is a pretty long time.


Quoting Aislinn:



Quoting Anonymous:

 she acts like she's two so I'm going to treat her like she is. and I never said I wasn't a bitch. I dont take shit from anyone and I'm not going to go through my life putting up with these people treating me the way they do so they're gonna learn.


Quoting Anonymous:


You sound like a bitch and your SO is out of his mind to even consider marrying you. WTF Timeout, what is she two?


Quoting Anonymous:


I'm not opposed to them coming back into our lives at some point in the future once they've learned a little respect. When he and I had been together for about 7 months she kept being rude to me and when I politely called her on it she said that I was being rude for calling her on it and that I needed to learn respect if she was going to let me be with her son. Oh HELL no. This is my way of proving to her that she doesn't have any sway whatsoever on who is in her son's life, actually *I* do and that if she wants to be in our lives SHE needs to learn some respect for the woman who is going to be his wife. Once she's done with her time-out and has learned to sit down and shut the hell up when I tell her to... then I'll probably let her back in.





 Good luck with this marriage. I give it five years. 


 True... lol 

intel18
by on May. 13, 2012 at 9:37 AM
I agree! You sound a bit selfish and insecure!


Quoting Anonymous:

What is wrong with him seeing his mother w/o you? He has a right to have a relationship with his mother and should not have to make a choice. I damn sure wouldn't marry you.


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Anonymous
by Anonymous 41 on May. 13, 2012 at 9:37 AM

this

Qg Acid:

Wow, you sound like a bitch.

This will backfire on you.  You should have let him tell them.  Unless he can't, in which case I can't imagine why you would want to marry someone who can't stand up to his family.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 41 on May. 13, 2012 at 9:38 AM

this

Quoting Perfect.Pixie:

Sounds pathetic. I don't get along with my in-laws (the women are toxic) and would never set that ultimatum! PS been married for 13 yrs, sooo you can be married and not get along with in-laws successfully.


fairyjester
by on May. 13, 2012 at 9:39 AM

he should have kicked you to the curb

chasinrainbows
by Gold Member on May. 13, 2012 at 9:41 AM
1 mom liked this
Good luck with that. I very seriously doubt your marriage will last and your boyfriend will definitely grow to resent the hell out of you.
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armywife0424
by on May. 13, 2012 at 9:42 AM
First let me start by saying I have the same mother in law and sister in law so I understand your frustration. But what your doing is wrong. My husband anf I song really talk about his family because it is a sore subject but I would never discourage him from seeing/talking to his family no matter how much I hate them. You need to really think about your conditions briefcase those people will always be his family and he will come to resent you in the end.
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mommyof11050307
by Platinum Member on May. 13, 2012 at 9:42 AM
After 2 and half years of crap from my fil I had to tell my husband that he either grew a set of balls and tell his parents to stop or I'm gone. There had been a ton of shit going on and it reached my breaking point. He finally did and it's been fine ever since. Both of his parents are drunks and I refuse to have them around my kids. My husband told his parents before Christmas we will not be going to their house any more because his dad is so bad.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
rliperote2
by on May. 13, 2012 at 9:48 AM
You dont knw the situation trust me I understand what she is goin through my ex in law were horrible and I married my ex anyways we were together from 16 we got married at 18 had 6 kids and ended up divorcing at 15 years. A lot had to do with them his mom was never nice to me . Had him picking her Over me mh sentire adult life it was hell. 2 years later he still lives with her. She is constantly trying to come between me and my kids. My ex left me stole our savings and sold my vehicle pocketed the money. I have joint custody of my children. I recently remarried and had a child with my new so and she has the kids thinking I left my ex for the new guy when we just met a year ago 2'of my kids refuse to see me and when they do there horrible for a few hours tell they warm up. At this point I have to get the police to meet me at the house or they won't give me my kids. It's hard on them all because they don't want to be disloyal.

My so and I never talk about them good or bad when the kids are over when they tell us what's being said we say we love them and let's not talk about negative things

I love my kids but sometimes i wish I never married him.


Quoting Acid:

Wow, you sound like a bitch.

This will backfire on you.  You should have let him tell them.  Unless he can't, in which case I can't imagine why you would want to marry someone who can't stand up to his family.

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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 20, 2012 at 9:47 PM

bump for update

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