So with mothers day around the corner, yesterday I called my mom to see if she wanted to get together and got some terrible news... let me start with some history
My mother has always been a chronic addict and alcoholic... Its been this way since I was 12... at 14 I went to live wtih my dad for a year while my mom went to rehab... 6 months later she was out and I thought all was perfect which it was for 2 years... shortly before I turned 17 she relapsed... bad worst she had ever been and her and my father in law split. Me her and my ssiter got a small 2 bedroom apartment but she couldnt hold a job and the only way she was able to make money was by bringing strange men intot he house on various occasions... when I turned 18 I had my grandmother take my sister in and I moved in with my now husband...
Since then me and my mother have had a very rocky relationship... I dont allow the kids to stay with her and she takes that very offensively but I dont feel safe leaving them with my alcoholic mother.
now that you have some backround
My mother told me yesterday that she is dying of multiple organ failure... lungs, kidney, and liver... the kidney and liver are both as a result of alcohol her lungs are going bad because of her smoking... she refuses to stop and is slowly commiting suicide... now my issue is...
Im angry... and hurt... yet I feel selfish... we have tried for many years to get this woman to go get help but she refused stated she wasnt sick... and now I just dontk now what to do... she wont stop and the doctor already told her that he can put her on a donor list.. but at this rate..... well it looks bad... and said if she doesnt stop she can expect it to happen even sooner.... what do i do... how do I cope... my mind is foggy its hard to concentrate at work... I have no time to mourne or think.. I work and when im not at work im with my kids and I refuse to be upset around them... I want their life filled with smiles... but im losing focus fast.
Alex and Tiffani 03/05/2011
Nevaeh Marie-Lynn 12/28/07