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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

So I think DH is having an emotional fair. I think this is the root of my insecurities lately.

  • He talks to this girl more than he talks to me
  • He defends her all the time
  • He will call her on his lunch breaks but not me
  • He pretty much txts her all the time
  • I have found messages from him and her saying each other is sexy, and they should play strippoker
  • He tries to hide his conversations with her, clicking off the page, deleting messages etc.
  • He abuses me when I ask who he's texting/calling
  • He admitted ina drunken argument that he flirts with her.
  • He accused me of cheating (as if)
  • They are old school friends
  • She is a known cheater.

On the other hand she lives about 20hrs away. However the more he talks to her, the less sex we have, the less time he spends with baby etc. What are your opinions (and don't just say leave).I've tried talking with him already...

by on May. 11, 2012 at 1:36 AM
Replies (21-30):
mom2cheesebug
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:07 AM
3 moms liked this

Im sorry, the only thing i can say is he talks to her because HE WANTS TO. Not because of a fault you have, its because he is an asshole. If you dont' want to leave than you need to find a way to be able to live with the fact that he will choose another woman over you, even though she is  not putting out. No woman deserves that and since you asked us not to tell you to leave, you obviously know what most of us would do in this situation.

BUFFIE.the.BODY
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:09 AM
Quoting JadedFaerie:



Well if you've tryed everything this is what you should do. Ignore it. Show no feeling, he'll get the,hit he's ur husband y wouldn't he. Don't bring it up anymore.

KILL HIM WITH KINDNESS, HE'LL LEARN

U KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, ”what u give is what u receive. He'll get his
JadedFaerie
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:10 AM


Quoting icequeen13500:

Hun he's more then likely cheating himself if he accuses you all the time, Two if he abuses you at all there is NO reason for that, ESPECIALLY if you have kids. Whats to keep him from abusing ur kids later down the line? Id say leave. All the reasons you listed ... why should you stay? If its love he obviously doesnt care the same as you do for him.

He says he does, all the time. I doubt he'd abuse our daughter,but I always wonder if he will turnout like his father.

Mama2Jaelyn
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:10 AM

I guess I'm not really sure what type of advice you are looking for? You say not to just tell you to leave and that you've tried talking and it doesn't work. I'm just not sure there's anything else for you to do. You either leave or you talk to him. Tell him you want to go to couples therapy and he can either join you, or he can call Jane Doe and see if she has a room available for him....Sorry if that's not helpful, I just don't honestly see any other options.

JadedFaerie
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:11 AM


Quoting BUFFIE.the.BODY:

Quoting JadedFaerie:



Well if you've tryed everything this is what you should do. Ignore it. Show no feeling, he'll get the,hit he's ur husband y wouldn't he. Don't bring it up anymore.

KILL HIM WITH KINDNESS, HE'LL LEARN

U KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, ”what u give is what u receive. He'll get his

I did that the last two days. When he was talking to her yesterday I' like 'oh is that such andsuch?'and he was like yeah, so I said 'oh cool'and went back to the computer.

JadedFaerie
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:13 AM


Quoting Mama2Jaelyn:

I guess I'm not really sure what type of advice you are looking for? You say not to just tell you to leave and that you've tried talking and it doesn't work. I'm just not sure there's anything else for you to do. You either leave or you talk to him. Tell him you want to go to couples therapy and he can either join you, or he can call Jane Doe and see if she has a room available for him....Sorry if that's not helpful, I just don't honestly see any other options.

No it's alright, thank you. He doesn't go to councilling, says they are fullof shit. We've discussed it, he promised before the wedding, but like usual it was empty.

The problem is we are living like 15 hours from all my friends and family.

Josie.Grossie
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:16 AM
You are very pretty! I live your veil :)

Quoting JadedFaerie:

Nice eyes are hot lol.

Wedding day lol ^^^

Quoting Josie.Grossie:

Never lust the bad points. Focus only on the good :)



Nice eyes are HAWT by the way :)




Quoting JadedFaerie:

Good points:

Tall
Nice eyes
To the point personality
A good listener

Bad points:

Too many to list lol. 

Quoting Josie.Grossie:

Everyone has been damaged some way or another. You are NOT worthless. If I were you I would sit down and write a list of all the things that you love about myself or just write a list of your good qualities. I urge you to tru this even if it seems strange. Then maybe that voice that tells you that you can do better will get louder.





Life is too short to spend any moment living in a way that is causing you unhappiness.






Quoting JadedFaerie:


Quoting Josie.Grossie:

Why do you not love yourself enough?



You deserve to be loved and put on a pedestal!







Please think about this reply.

I know deep down I could have / still could do better, but on the surfaceI'm pretty sure no one wants damaged goods. I love myself in someways, but in otherways I know I'm not worth much.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
wymama610
by Gold Member on May. 11, 2012 at 2:17 AM
Stop making excuses. You know what you need to do, and you know what you want to do. Now get the balls to do it. Don't let your daughter grow up thinking your situation is normal. Perhaps if you leave for a bit and show him you are serious, he will snap back and realize what he is doing. Good luck!!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Mama2Jaelyn
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:18 AM

You know what, I take my previous comment back, I do have another option for you. I think YOU should go to therapy (not saying that to be mean). It really seems to me that you have some self esteem issues. That you don't see yourself as someone worthy of being loved and treated with respect. To quote Dr. Phil : We teach people how to treat us. So if you don't like how your being treated you need to to teach your husband how you should be treated, and I don't know if you know how to right now. Which is why I think therapy might help. You need to be able to fully love and respect yourself before you can expect anyone else too! Good luck sweetie! I really hope everything works out for you!

hugs

Quoting JadedFaerie:


Quoting Mama2Jaelyn:

I guess I'm not really sure what type of advice you are looking for? You say not to just tell you to leave and that you've tried talking and it doesn't work. I'm just not sure there's anything else for you to do. You either leave or you talk to him. Tell him you want to go to couples therapy and he can either join you, or he can call Jane Doe and see if she has a room available for him....Sorry if that's not helpful, I just don't honestly see any other options.

No it's alright, thank you. He doesn't go to councilling, says they are fullof shit. We've discussed it, he promised before the wedding, but like usual it was empty.

The problem is we are living like 15 hours from all my friends and family.


icequeen13500
by on May. 11, 2012 at 2:22 AM

If he is hurting you, your baby will not be safe. Ive gone threw this with my sister. What happens when she is old enogh to accedently get between him and you? She could get hurt pretty badly. Even if its verbal, growing up in a household full of angry words and yelling dose horrble emotional damage to a child. But it seems as tho you really dont wanna leave him... For the safty of the child i really wouldnt suggest it. PERIOD. But alas it is your choice. It sounds like battered wife syndrome.... sorry. Im not trying to be mean, just concerned.

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