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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I Want Another Baby...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 120 Replies

but hubby says no. :(

We decided before we even got married that we're going to have 8-10 kids and I was going to stay at home. This was when he was getting into the insurance saling deal where he assured me we could live off his salary if he busted his butt and succeeded very well at it.

Now things changed dramatically: He's given up on the insurance thing "for now" as he puts it, and he's working a call dispatching job that pays him $9 an hour. We have a 1 y/o son (wasn't planned for yet, just happened) and we make it work. We scrape by, but we pay our bills. We agreed that we'd get pregnant as soon as we can after the first one, and then have a 2 year break before we start and have 2 more (if that makes sense). At this rate I won't even be able to get pregnant with the 2nd one by the time our first turns 2 :( . My husband's gotten so comfortable at his job, he said even if he could find a higher paying job, if it's not what he's doing now or in insurance, he won't take it. I'm usually the very passive person in the marriage and since he's older, it seems like he belittles me all the time about decisions. It feels like he thinks he'll just find a million dollars on the sidewalk one day and we can have all our kids and go back to all our plans.

I'm sorry if I'm not making any sense. I just feel heartbroken. I love my little man, but I wanted him to have a little sibling and I don't feel like I can just be a mommy to one :( . Basically my husband told me no more kids until he can make more money for us to support them. At this rate, that won't happen for awhile.

Posted by Anonymous on May. 14, 2012 at 2:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Jblaac57
by on May. 14, 2012 at 2:50 PM

 I'm sorry that things arent working out the way you planned them. But i do think that you should wait until you can financially support more. I know you want your lo to have a sibling but if you cant give them everything they want and need then whats the point

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 14, 2012 at 2:53 PM
2 moms liked this
Then get a job and help support more kids.
fraujones
by Mommytron on May. 14, 2012 at 2:58 PM

Welcome to reality. Dreaming about 8-10 kids is a lot different than having them. It takes a crapload of money to raise kids, IMO. 

It sounds like you'll have to get a job to afford a second one. Hopefully your husband will get a raise too. 

AbbyGracesMommy
by on May. 14, 2012 at 2:59 PM
5 moms liked this
I'd be more concerned about the fact your husband belittles you.
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Ashleeduhh
by Gold Member on May. 14, 2012 at 3:00 PM


Quoting Jblaac57:

 I'm sorry that things arent working out the way you planned them. But i do think that you should wait until you can financially support more. I know you want your lo to have a sibling but if you cant give them everything they want and need then whats the point

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 14, 2012 at 3:04 PM
That's not part of our beliefs. It's my job to keep up the house and take care of our son. But he works 3-4 days a week on 12 hour shifts, and gets overtime just sometimes.

Quoting Anonymous:

Then get a job and help support more kids.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 14, 2012 at 3:05 PM
Me getting a job is the very first thing we're avoiding. So that just means I have to keep waiting.

Quoting fraujones:

Welcome to reality. Dreaming about 8-10 kids is a lot different than having them. It takes a crapload of money to raise kids, IMO. 

It sounds like you'll have to get a job to afford a second one. Hopefully your husband will get a raise too. 

slransde
by on May. 14, 2012 at 3:07 PM
Wow 8 to 10 kids is a ton!!

Sorry your dh won't give you more right now. :-(
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 14, 2012 at 3:08 PM
It's not a real big concern. He's not abusive or anything towards me, he just likes things done his way.

Quoting AbbyGracesMommy:

I'd be more concerned about the fact your husband belittles you.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 14, 2012 at 3:09 PM
I understand that money is the key issue, it's just sad for me :(

Quoting slransde:

Wow 8 to 10 kids is a ton!!



Sorry your dh won't give you more right now. :-(
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