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Ok, Christian Pro Lifers...explain this one... (edited with correction)

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My friend and her husband of been TTC for the last 10 years.  Nothing has worked.  So they are thinking of getting a surrogate.  Fine whatever but what I dont get is that they are both VOCAL Pro Life.  Their biggest answer to this debate is give the baby up for adoption.  This couple will not even consider adoption.  Their reason is because the baby would not be theirs.  I just dont get it.  They are well off, not rich but better off then most upper middle class families.  They could give some poor child a really awesome home but instead are (IMO) throwing that money away.  If they are such Christians, why dont they listen to God's obvious choice in this matter.  Can someone explain this to me?  I want to say something to them but I know it would be considered rude so I don't because its their choice.  But I do think it is completely wrong.

Thoughts? 

by on May. 14, 2012 at 5:44 PM
Replies (11-20):
SavdNSanctified
by Platinum Member on May. 14, 2012 at 5:58 PM

I'm Christian and I totally understand their desire for a biological child. I don't see how anyone could not get that. Just because it is difficult to achieve a bio kid, doesn't mean God doesn't want them to have one.

LucyHarper
by on May. 14, 2012 at 5:58 PM

Adotion is not for everyone, it's their decision. Just because they don't want to adopt doesn't mean they think all kids who would go into the adoption process would be better off not being born. Infants are pretty high demand in adoption. Personally, if I couldn't have children I would adopt rather then get a surrogate, but everyone is different and that is their decision. I would never call someone selfish for not being an adoptive parent.

ragitty
by on May. 14, 2012 at 6:02 PM

I don't think this is a typical action of someone who is strongly pro-life, but everyone is different. I can imagine it must be painful to be ttc so long with no results, but I have already discussed with dh what we would do. It would be adoption or nothing for us for various reasons. I cannot fault them as Christians, but I would probably disagree with their decision to go to such extraordinary measures to have a biological baby when there are so many babies and children in the world without families. 

I wish them and all other parents of surrogated babies/in vitro babies the best, though.

misfitdiva
by Bronze Member on May. 14, 2012 at 6:05 PM
2 moms liked this

 Then why is it that when a woman gets pregnant its God's will but if a woman can not get pregnant then it's not God's will?  If a woman wants an abortion because she doesnt want the child then she is going against God's will but if that same woman can not get pregnant, then she isnt going against God's will using other ways to have a biological child?  Seems to me that there is a double standard.

Quoting SavdNSanctified:

I'm Christian and I totally understand their desire for a biological child. I don't see how anyone could not get that. Just because it is difficult to achieve a bio kid, doesn't mean God doesn't want them to have one.

 

DevinAnnesmom
by Sarah on May. 14, 2012 at 6:11 PM

I can't explain what other Christians think and do. I can only speak for my own actions. Being a Christian doesn't make you perfect and you still have free will which will sometimes go against God's will. If they have prayed about it and they are comfortable in their decision, then that's between them and God.

SavdNSanctified
by Platinum Member on May. 14, 2012 at 6:21 PM

Why can't using a surrogate be God's will?

Quoting misfitdiva:

 Then why is it that when a woman gets pregnant its God's will but if a woman can not get pregnant then it's not God's will?  If a woman wants an abortion because she doesnt want the child then she is going against God's will but if that same woman can not get pregnant, then she isnt going against God's will using other ways to have a biological child?  Seems to me that there is a double standard.

Quoting SavdNSanctified:

I'm Christian and I totally understand their desire for a biological child. I don't see how anyone could not get that. Just because it is difficult to achieve a bio kid, doesn't mean God doesn't want them to have one.

 


singlemom1208
by on May. 14, 2012 at 6:22 PM
They have every right to choose the way they become parents
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LucyMom08
by BS Intolerant on May. 14, 2012 at 6:25 PM

Because they only care about the fetus, not about the child after it is already born. Unless it is their DNA.

emeraldangel20
by on May. 14, 2012 at 6:27 PM


Quoting LucyMom08:

Because they only care about the fetus, not about the child after it is already born. Unless it is their DNA.

this.


Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 14, 2012 at 6:27 PM

I am not God. I can't speculate on God's decisions.

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