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My DH wants me to cancel Facebook!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
So my DH has never used fb and does not like social networking he says Im basically in another world when I use it an says that it can get people in trouble with old flames, he also thinks only a handful of people in you friends list are actual friends an we can always get in touch with family through phone,text, or email.
So I really like fb but don't want it to cause a rift in my marriage and don't want to go behind his back...what should I do...what would you do?

Well, I am currently still using it ,just to let everyone know it is definitely not a trust issue with DH I think really its an unknown one going into the unknown I mean, he doesn't feel comfortable about letting people you don't barely know have access to things in your life and he doesn't understand posting pics all in cyberspace, he has also mentioned that sometime I've become upset over certain posts or statuses and have told him I'm sick of it and going to cancel my account(which I have said) soon..... I've decided I will keep it until I decide to deactivate and just simply not go on it or bring up anything about it when he is around so far this has been working well!
Posted by Anonymous on May. 19, 2012 at 9:01 AM
Replies (21-30):
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 19, 2012 at 9:18 AM
We are both mature in age im 34 he is 44 he just doesn't really get the whole thing and thinks its a waste of time I don't think he would ever get a fb account.

Quoting Anonymous:

How old are you and your dh? How long married? He sounds insecure. Maybe add his name to the account,so you teo have a joint acct and he has the pswd as well. He may find that he likes it
by on May. 19, 2012 at 9:19 AM

For someone who doesn't use Facebook, he sure likes it enough to make a big deal over you using it. You don't use it for those reasons, do you? If not, continue to use it, regardless of what he says. He's obviously going into another world when he sees you on it, too.

by on May. 19, 2012 at 9:20 AM

id tell him its fb. its not that serious.

by Ruby Member on May. 19, 2012 at 9:21 AM

 Yes, you can't possibly be a responsible adult while using facebook.  LOL

by on May. 19, 2012 at 9:21 AM

Yes, but I have no issue with DH knowing I use it... :) he will get over it... he knows all my passwords everything... so it works

Quoting Anonymous:

I found out you can actually adjust the settings so that people can't see your friends list or can be restricted in what they can see, and in some cases can make yourself totally invisible to being searched or found at all if you wanted to. So it would appear you didnt use FB at all.

Quoting ilovemykids732:

I let my DH delete mine before, and than I made a new one... haha but he knows I did... it was a year later... he also knows who I add, and tells me if he doesnt like someone who I added, I than delete that person... :)

by Bronze Member on May. 19, 2012 at 9:24 AM
Then what does he think about cm then?
As for his request, I can't help you. My spouse would never ask me to do something like that. I think the stories of old flames reuniting is overblown and if he trusted you and you have no issues in your relationship, I don't see the big deal
by on May. 19, 2012 at 9:24 AM

Not letting him control you would be telling him that although you respect his feelings.. you are an adult and are not doing anything wrong, so you won't be controlled or told what to do in that way.

Not letting him thinking he is controlling you, and being forced to sneak around.

Quoting Anonymous:

easy enough to delete the one he knows about and create another one he doesn't. But i understand you dont wanna go behind his back. 

I guess for me the easiest thing is to let them think they got their way. I'm an adult, I won't be controlled. Marriage is a teamwork effort, not a boss-employee relationship. I'd honestly just use FB when he wasnt around and clear my cache and history when I was done, esp if we shared the computer.

I know thats probly not your style, but I would not let myself be controlled in that way.

OR keep your current and make a 2nd one he doesn't know about so that you can use it in peace and let your hair down. I also think making a joint acct is a good idea while keeping your own individual one.

East Coast Mama

First of all, I can see the sun, okay? Unlike some other gods I could  mention, I can actually see the sun. I'm big on that. If I can see something, I don't know, it kind of helps the credibility along, you know? So everyday I can see the sun, as it gives me everything I need; heat, light, food, flowers in the park, reflections on the lake, an occasional skin cancer, but hey. At least there are no crucifixions, and we're not setting people on fire simply because they don't agree with us.
Sun worship is fairly simple. There's no mystery, no miracles, no pageantry, no one asks for money, there are no songs to learn, and we don't have a special building where we all gather once a week to compare clothing.
And the best thing about the sun, it never tells me I'm unworthy. Doesn't tell me I'm a bad person who needs to be saved. Hasn't said an unkind word. Treats me fine. So, I worship the sun. But, I don't pray to the sun. Know why? I wouldn't presume on our friendship. It's not polite." - George Carlin

by Silver Member on May. 19, 2012 at 9:38 AM
Oh ok, just sounded like and argument that me and dh had when we had just got married. We came up with a compromise though, no exs on our friends list! and if an ex write us a message we just ignore it.

Quoting Anonymous:

No we've been married 7yes and been together 10 lol

Quoting JeremiahJackson:

Are you a newlywed?

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 19, 2012 at 9:39 AM
Just give him your login info & let him look around a bit, so he won't get all "butt hurt" about it. Men can be so aggravating at times.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Ruby Member on May. 19, 2012 at 9:59 AM

 Keep it.  My dh doesn't technically like facebook, but he can get on my fb anytime he wants.  I told him its open, so he can look if he so pleases.

He doesn't.  We trust each other.

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