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My husband just took my daughter and said he filed for divorce

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I know I don't know any of you, but I'm lost. This afternoon my husband took my daughter to his moms and said he filed for divorce. I live an hour away from my friends and family and cant reach anyone on the phone. I am in such despair. I feel like I have been stabbed in the back my my husband (do I even call him that anymore?) I have cried so long I don't know what to do. He said his lawyer told him he cant leave our house and he is planning on coming home tomorrow night. He said he would stay at his moms tonight so I can calm down. How do I calm down? How do I look at him? I want to move back home where im from obviously where I have support but he said he will only consider joint  custody if I stay here where his family is. I cant get ahold of anyone to talk to and I am lost. Im alone. I feel like I cant breathe. Someone...anyone....please offer any kind words or advice. I told him I at least want the divorce to be amicable and he said that would not be possible. Help me

by on May. 26, 2012 at 5:44 PM
Replies (51-55):
by on May. 26, 2012 at 8:22 PM

Deep breath.  I understand your pain.  First thing next week, contact a family law attorney.  They will help you with custody and visitation.  Your husband may not have a choice about where you live.  Ask about domicile restrictions. I applaud you for wanting an amicable divorce and not wanting to be a vindictive witch.  Keep being amicable in the fore front of your mind and that will help with being civil.  PM me if you want; I've been there, done that.

by Ruby Member on May. 26, 2012 at 8:38 PM
But he can. As long as he is with their daughter the cops can do nothing. Now if he is not at the house she can do that.

Op, file for emergency temp custody and get a lawyer asap! Good luck and I'm sorry he's being such a douche! You deserve better!

Quoting enafaye:












Stay strong.  Why can't you get a police officer and go get your daughter?  Not sure where you live but in jersey, grandparents have no rights.  They can't keep you from picking her up. So sorry this is happening.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 26, 2012 at 9:55 PM
1 mom liked this
Im so letting my sis know her bf of 16yrs is a butt to say it nicely

Quoting AdellesMom:


I'm telling my cousin about this. Great advice!

Quoting Sanctimommy:

You may take the child back the second the father leaves her alone with his mother and goes to work. Unfortunately, the same is true for him. Get the child, do not let her out of your sight, and immediately file for custody and child support. You may also file for indigency if you cannot afford the filing fee. Also be sure to include a petition for a pro bono attorney, stating that you feel that your parental rights might be in danger if you do not have one appointed.

Well, at least that is how it works here in Florida.

After a judge has declared you indigent, you may make his financial life impossible by filing petitions for him to be screened for drugs, to be psychologically examined, to take parenting classes and all sorts of other useless things. Each time his own attorney must stop and answer these petitions, he will be billed by that attorney by the hour. He will soon run out of money. This is often called 'litigating someone to death'.

I once worked for a very disreputable attorney and learned all sorts of underhanded legal tactics they use. 

But you didn't hear this from me. 

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 27, 2012 at 10:36 AM

Thanks everyone. Im sorry I am just now getting back this morning. I have cried so hard, my eyes are so swollen I cant see out of them. I want to see my Daughter, but I know i need to be calm and dont know if I can right now. My mom came up last night and while she was here, my husband came over to get clothes. I was sobbing on the couch while my mother held me and he was laughing at me! I am in so much pain and he thinks its funny.

by Anonymous 7 on May. 27, 2012 at 10:40 AM

Then it's on, he is now the enemy. You don't say a word to the man and you quietly plan your attack. He's going to try and take every cent, everything you own, and your child. You need to get a lawyer if you can and do exactly as you're told by him/her. A judge will not take your daughter away from you, you can move wherever you please. Don't listen to a word that your husband is saying right now, he is wrong. Anything you can use against him, document and print stuff out. It's war.

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