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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Would you ALLOW your teen to have SEX in your house ?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
?
Posted by Anonymous on May. 28, 2012 at 12:30 PM
Replies (211-220):
Kaybean
by Ruby Member on May. 28, 2012 at 5:48 PM
No way!
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NiCo86
by on May. 28, 2012 at 5:49 PM
Depends on the teen, the relationship, all that, ya know? IDK I'd rather them have safe sex in a safe environment then try to sneak around in public bathrooms, outside behind buildings, or on school property! If it's a long term respectful relationship (rare in teens these days mind you) I wouldn't see too much issue.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 20 on May. 28, 2012 at 5:50 PM
No! I'd make em take it out to a car in the driveway where teens are supposed to have sex :)
AnastasiaKorsh
by on May. 28, 2012 at 5:50 PM

I did not see this reply before I posted, but I wholeheartedly agree with you.

Quoting booklover74:

Why you keep insisting that everyone should be following your god and your rules is a mystery to me. Are you so closed minded and self centered to think the entire world (or even those on cafemom) follows your religious beliefs and rules?

 I hold no illusions that our morals or the way we live our lives and the choices we make do not have any direct impact on other families around us. if I did then I would be justifiably disapointed in you and your family for holding to such strict and in my opinion, unhealthy rules about your children biological urges or heck even your parenting. I raise my children to be happy, healthy, strong adults that make choices for themselves based on facts not because someone else believes in something.

We raise our children to be happy, healthy, strong adults that make choices for themselves based on facts and information not because someone else believes in something or someone or a book told them it was the right thing to do. They are allowed to form their own opinions on right and wrong and how to live their lives. I find it scary that you are still controlling your 23 year old, adult sons life to the point that he is never without you or other family members, as you've implied. That doesn't seem like it would make for a well adjusted adult at all.

We don't have any problem or negative thoughts on a person having more than one sex partner throughout life or before marriage. In fact I'd be perfectly fine if my kids decide not to get married. I wouldn't assume or expect that means they won't have sex or children. In our live sex is most certainly not reserved for marriage or making babies. Of course out lives are run by the bible or a god we don't worship. we also have never trained our children because they aren't pets. We raised them, educate them and teach them to think for themselves and seek out information to form opinions on. 

Your god didn't create our rules or us.



Quoting startupscafe:

The way someone lives doesn't hurt just that one person, it hurts everyone around them. If you could talk to my son you would see. With your allowance for sex in your home, you have already trained your children to sleep around. They will have consequences from that in their lives. God created us and made the rules.


Quoting AnastasiaKorsh:

Like I said, we can only hope that our children continue to follow how they are raised. If abstinence worked for your son, awesome. However, I do not believe that absitence is a realistic thing to just teach in most cases. I am not religious, and I do not plan on home schooling, my children will be exposed to the world and the pressures that come along with being a teen going to school , and I plan on teaching them to stay safe, whether they decide to have sex or not. Because sex IS a personal decision regardless of what you have been taught. Your son made the choice to be abstinent, however, he can also choose to change him mind. You just hope that he doesn't.

Quoting startupscafe:

My family is very close. My son could not have possibly broken his vow to abstinence since he spends all his time with his family and was homeschooled. His friends and their families are always together also. As for those who claimed abstinence weren't taught straight from the Bible. It wasn't really in their hearts to abstain. My son has taught me even more. He plans to wait for kissing until his wedding day. That says a lot.





Quoting AnastasiaKorsh:

And you that how? Follow him around to make sure he isn't seeing anyone? (the answer I'm sure being "Because we've raised him that way and we trust him" and the same can be said for my children. We can only hope that our children follow how they were raised.)

Also, if abstinence only worked, it wouldn't have such a high failure rate. Majority of teens who pleadge abstinence end up getting pregnant within two or three years of taking their pledge. Many also end up with STD's because they are never taught about contreception.

http://onlineathens.com/local-news/2011-11-29/abstinence-only-sex-education-doesnt-work-say-uga-researchers

ETA: Many parents that teach kids about comprehensive contreception use also mention abstinence as a way to prevent yourself from getting pregnant or catching an STD. But it is not the end all solution.

Quoting startupscafe:

My son is 23 years old and has been taught no dating until he finishes a college degree. He has been taught how to be a gentleman and has become a pilot as well. We have kept him busy with things that will make him productive in his life to be able to support a family someday. That is real safe sex...abstinence.








Quoting AnastasiaKorsh:

If you're asking me, same can be asked of you? How are you going to make sure that your children don't have sex outside of marriage? As a parent I can only warn my children of what might happen, and I can educate them to make the right choice when it comes to having sex. Not just chalk it up to "oh, its just what married couples do."












kattu
by on May. 28, 2012 at 5:51 PM
For me as well.

Quoting quickbooksworm:

Exactly this.




Quoting Tatum2U:

No I wouldn't allow it .


But I also realize it may happen which is why I am very open when discussing sex with my kids.




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Mweddle
by Gold Member on May. 28, 2012 at 5:51 PM

 No way.

smurfbitebug
by on May. 28, 2012 at 5:53 PM
No. And if her future teen boyfriend wants to live a somewhat peaceful life, they had better never get caught anywhere else, either. And I say somewhat peaceful because, who are we kidding? We will already be giving him nightmares.
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JanuaryBaby06
by Gold Member on May. 28, 2012 at 6:09 PM

this may sound goofy but what do you mean allow? How do you allow it? Thats what confuses me. Like 'Hey kids if you needa have sex my house is always open' or do you mean more like never allow the oppisite sex to sleep over or be left alone together? I have never heard of a parent ever giving permission but all of my friends parents have giving them privacy and isnt that kind of allowing it... or leaving your kids home with out is.... is that aloowing it? Letting them go over there house... it may not be in your house but are you kind of allowing it?

Ashleeduhh
by Gold Member on May. 28, 2012 at 6:11 PM
This. If the kid is in a serious relationship, and the girl was on bc etc and they were responsible, I may because they will do it somewhere else. It's naive to think otherwise.

Quoting Anonymous:

Depends on the age. Their gonna do it one way or another and find some place to do it where they might get in trouble.
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Jessiejem
by Gold Member on May. 28, 2012 at 6:11 PM
I say no now , but I have babies . I don't think so though
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