If you're a birth mother.....

[Anonymous]

Would you try to keep your kids from seeing their father if he couldn't pay child support temporarily?

If there were no other issues other than money or lack of it?

Just a curious stepmom here......

I posted anonymous because I don't know if the BM in question is on this site **

[myneondreamz]

No

[holls2188]

no

[treetree2007]

It's not right, but people do it all the time.

[Anonymous]

No, I wouldn't.  That would only hurt my child.  My SK's live with us and BM hasn't helped financially one iota, but she still gets to see the kids every other weekend (more often if she requests and we don't have plans).

[starryeyez23]

No. Child support and visitation are 2 seperate issues. Who is that hurting? Your child!

[Anonymous]

i can't get past the fact you call her birth mom...

She is mom not birth mom. Birth mom is only used for mothers who have given their child up to adoption or was a surrogate for a couple.

[Jennyanne322]

If my sons father actually saw him all the time and attempted to be a dad. I wouldn't care about child support at all, but since he doesn't care about his son. Doesn't answer his phone calls or anything. So I filed for support.

[Anonymous]

Do you keep her from bio dads parents? I know my ex bff use to do that just because the dad wasn't paying child support. The boys didn't get to know their grandparents until they hit 16.

Quoting mommy_me:

 Honestly I dont know what to say here.

Every situation is different and Ive only seen first hand what I myself have been through with dd bio dad. He doesnt call, write or ask about her. He hardly pays child support. Only when his gf bitches and asks why he doesnt have his kid does he make his mother call and ask if dd can come over(still lives with his mom)

At this point I say no. She has a father who she adores and never fails her. Her bio dad was abusive to her, talks crap about me and makes her call his gf "mommy N******" The last time they called he was $1200 in child support. It had been months since my dd had seen him and he wanted to take her with him and his gf out of state to NY. I said, since you have money to go 1800 miles away on vacation, do you have the money to support your child. He flipped out and screamed at me he didnt. So, I refused to let him have dd (NOT THAT HE WOULD HAVE BEEN ALLOWED TO TAKE HER ANYWAY SCREW THAT) My daughter deserves stability and he isnt it.

[Anonymous]

My husband ex just did this. So he took a pick of his check stub with everything covered up except the child support part to prove to her it was taken out. she was bitching because she says she hasn't gotten it in a few month and he told her to call child support since he has prove it has been taken out. I can't stand moms and some fathers that keep their kids away from their parents over money.

[Anonymous]

My view is that just because you can't pay doesn't mean your child stops eating, or needing shoes / clothes, Dr's appts, etc.

I don't think I would stop visitation if the dad had already shown that he was a good parent and was taking regular visitation. I would however, not be okay with the "hey I'm broke, sorry I can't pay child support". You have a child, you have a responsibility to that child. I have heard every excuse for that one, and in the end that child still has to eat, still needs a roof over his or her head, it's not their fault nor should it have any effect on them that their non-custodial parent got laid off, quit his or her job, or is having a hard time supporting their new family and their previous children. Get a second job, get a third job, you do what you need to in order to take care of your responsibilities.