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A widower asked me out....

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 33 Replies

I have major concerns about a widower that recently asked me out on a date. We met online and he told me that his wife committed suicide the end of March of this year. He actually found her hanging :(  He has a 1.5 yr old and a 2 yr old. I'm divorced and have a 3 yr old. I know everyone has a different time table for grieving but I just feel it's too soon for him to be dating. Do I have a valid reason for being hesitant?

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:42 PM
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sadiebug1228
by Silver Member on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:45 PM
Wow. I would be hesitant! I would take it slow with him, he might need someone to talk to
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Tesserae
by Mrs.Mellark on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:46 PM
3 moms liked this

I would offer friendship. That is way too soon for him to have his feelings sorted out and ready for a romantic relationship.

Tal0n
by Gold Member on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:49 PM

Yes.  I wouldn't put myself in that situation.  Rebounding so soon after such a tragedy is a HUGE mistake and you don't want to be part of that.

Sunshine257
by Platinum Member on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:49 PM

I dated a widower and he always kept his wife on a pedistool You can't compete with that. And yeah it is too soon. He is probably just lonely and needs a friend.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:51 PM

I guess I could offer friendship but I'm honestly not online to find more friends if you know what I mean. He's been on two dating sites since her passing...

Quoting Tesserae:

I would offer friendship. That is way too soon for him to have his feelings sorted out and ready for a romantic relationship.


Ber-Lynn
by Count Me In on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:51 PM
I am with a widower but we got together a little after 5 years of her passing from cancer. He might just need someone to talk to. If you don't want to go out on a date tell him you will go out as friends and just start out as friends and take it slow from there.
FL2AK
by Platinum Member on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:52 PM
I would just pass on him. That is way too soon for him to be dating. He needs to focus on his children.
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momo3fgr8tteens
by Ruby Member on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:53 PM

Maybe just be friends with him now and see where it goes. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:53 PM

I asked him straight out if he felt it was too soon to start dating and he said no that he felt ready. I just know he's not ready. Can you imagine all the emotions he must feel toward her? Anger, hurt, sadness....

LampPost
by Gold Member on Jun. 3, 2012 at 3:54 PM
Far too soon for him.
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