omg so tired of my mom smothering me over this baby!

I'm 40 weeks and 4 days about..and for MONTHS my mom has been suffocating me over being with me during labor…I say no! I hired a doula and I have dh there too, its a personal time to me and I'm having a natural birth again, but this time at the hospital since dh doesn't feel comfortable with homebirth.
With my dd5 I didn't call my mom to say baby was born until about 9am and she was born at 5:22am. That's not a huge gap! Jesus! Can I get some family time??
Now she's trying to be in the waiting room...she works for the hospital so I know she's gonna try to shove her way into the room during my most difficult times! Gah!
Is it so wrong to want to call her the next day or morning after? Its not like I'm calling anyone else first! She thinks my dad is so rude because he says he will come the next day or give me a few days to heal u know? Which is great! She's so damn pushy!
I don't want to hurt her feelings but while I've been writing this she text me 4x saying she will pick up dd5 when I go into labor, cool. Except she knows I'm so excited to show dd5 her new brother...alone. and of coarse she will be there...ugh!! I need family time! Back the hell off woman! Do I have to be mean?

[MicheleJM]

I'd just see if the nurse and doctors can tell her you need to rest and no visitors for such and such amount of time. Let them be the bad guys.  If she is bringing dd5 to the hospital to see her new brother you really can't expect her to not want to be there too.  Maybe the nurse can "throw her out" too after a certain period of time, I'm sorry I mean ask her politely to leave as you need rest.

[boshs1andonly]

This is why we didn't tell anyone that I was being induced. Sometimes its easier to tell them afterwards. Good luck...

[NoahandEliza]

I had to be mean about it. It's my brand new baby, I want to hold her and I don't want to pass her around to anybody but dh. Plus, giving birth takes a lot out of you! I'm not up forentertaining anyone after delivering a human being! My mil pushed to be there and I finally told her, flat out, it wasn't happening. Dd wasn't her baby, she could wait until we got home. I let my sister come the day after, but only because she was watching ds.

[Sanctimommy]

Wow. You seem so angry. I'm glad both of my daughters asked me to be a part of all my Grandchildrens' births. 

[LuvUSoMuch]

Maybe you could write your feelings to her explaining how you feel and that it is the final say in a "delicately written" note?

Don't forget, it's a very beautiful time for her as well. Couldn't she just wait in the waiting room?? 

[annie610]

 I agree:)

Quoting ccnstanczak:

 she is excited but she needs to respect your wishes. you dont have to be mean but you have to be perfectcly clear about what you want. good luck.

 

[glynch]

Nurses will be your best friend. Just make it very clear to them you do not want her there and they will take care of it for you. And if she is bringing your dd to meet her new brother your hubby could meet her at in the waiting room or at the entrance to the hospital.

Quoting MicheleJM:

I'd just see if the nurse and doctors can tell her you need to rest and no visitors for such and such amount of time. Let them be the bad guys.  If she is bringing dd5 to the hospital to see her new brother you really can't expect her to not want to be there too.  Maybe the nurse can "throw her out" too after a certain period of time, I'm sorry I mean ask her politely to leave as you need rest.