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I feel like I'm ruining her baby shower

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

A very good friend asked me to host her baby shower and I happily agreed. I'm very excited for her and honored that she wants me to host. However, she has a lot of ideas for the shower that I simply can't afford. I am a stay at home mom and my finances are pretty tight. I can afford to throw her a nice simple shower but not the type she seems to want. She showed me the invites she's in love with and they are $2.00 each to order. She also has a very large guest list to she recommended a hall to rent that is $175.00. These are things I simply cannot afford. Her husband makes quite a lot more than mine so I think she honestly just doesn't realize that this is going to be too much for me. I don't want to ruin her special day but I just honestly can't throw the shower she wants.

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:17 PM
Replies (11-20):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:22 PM
1 mom liked this

You're throwing her a party and she's telling you how?  Uh, no. 

xomrs.chase
by Ruby Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:22 PM
That's pretty demanding for a shower imo. I wanted mine a certain way but we paid for it and my patents had it at their house
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redhead-bedhead
by on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:22 PM

I would tell her and if she's a good friend she should understand. 

aimhawk
by Gold Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:22 PM

So, just tell her and if she decides a simple one isn't enough tell her to ask someone else. Or if you have another mutual friend ask if they could chip in.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:22 PM
1 mom liked this

She asked you to give her a baby shower?  That is just tacky beyond words.  

baquick
by Ruby Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:23 PM
See If some of her friends will chip in. Ive assisted with a couple showers. Also just let her know that it's too much. See if you can come up with some cheaper/"more fun"/casual places. Also see if you can make the invites. Shutterfly is a great place for that.
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Mazie0723
by Platinum Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:26 PM
My boss threw me a surprise shower with my last. It was at her house she ordered take out and we played games and had cake. I loved it.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:26 PM
1 mom liked this

This.  So basically, she asked you to give her a gift.  

Hey, I want a new car ... come with me and I'll show you which one and what features and what colors and all that ... 

Quoting Anonymous:

Usually a shower is a gift - a party thrown FOR someone, not something they help plan and place demands on.  I think I'd offer to step out so that someone else can throw her party. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:28 PM

If you want me to throw your shower, it will be on (date) at (time), at (location) and you may provide me a list with the (25? 50?  however man) people that you'd most like to be there.  Thanks. 

fanci64
by Silver Member on Jun. 8, 2012 at 6:28 PM
Talk to her about it. Explain your financial limits and see if she wants to pay for it or if she wants to have someone else throw it that can afford those things. I understand her wanting things to be a certain way but a shower is supposed to be a gift from your friends, a surprise for you. But some women have to javelin control over everything and she may be one of those women. Just talk to her.
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