Back story - My 16 year old son is very violent and has been for several years. I put him in counseling and tried to find him help. I always seemed to hit a brick wall. The state we live in does not have a very good mental health system.
In May of 2011 son, then 15, beat me up pretty badly. The police were called and he was arrested and put into a juvinile detention facility for 14 days. He has since been on probation.
He is still violent and to be honest, I'm afraid of him. I find myself often walking on egg shells trying to stay out of his way. When he has a violent outburst it is usually because I have asked him to do something that he doesn't want to do (clean his room, take out the trash or even just pick up after himself) or I've tried to punish him for some trouble that hes gotten into. The punishment is usually me taking away his cell phone or some other priviledge. My attempts at parenting are usually met with anger and violence. When this happens I tell him that I will be calling his probation officer to which he replies "If you do, I will tell them that you beat us everyday". I'm ashamed to admit that this threat has kept me from calling.
I hear the horror stories of how children are taken away for no reason and I have a 4 year old. The thought of losing my children over a lie scares the hell out of me.
This morning he became violent when asked for the third week the clean his trash out of my car. He got in my face and cursed me calling me a fucking bitch and saying that he didn't have to do anything I said. I slapped he mouth and he pulled a meat fork out of the butcher block and came after me. He stopped himself before stabbing me and put the meat fork away. I called his probation officer. His probation officer came to the house and spoke with him. My son then made good on his threat and reported to him that I beat my 3 children. My 18 year old, of course, spoke up and said that's not true. However, being an officer of the court, the probation officer has to report it to Children and Youth, who will investigate.
He says that I punched him in, this is not true. He punched me. He grabbed my finger and bent it back, while telling me that he was going to break it.
I'm just so scared right now and don't need bashed.