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I don't buy it when a SAHM says her family can't afford for her to work *clarification*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

If your family can't afford for you to work, how in the heck can a single mom afford to do it? I find it hilarious that some of the same women claiming that they can't work are the ones criticizing those on PA. If something happens to your little slice of heaven and you end up a single mom, what are you going to do? Since supposedly you can't afford to work when you have someone else supplying money for housing, food, and etc., how could you do it without them?

My point in posting this was that a lot of the people who are criticizing people on PA are SAHMs. How in the world can a single mom do it by herself without PA? I am not bashing SAHMs, but I think it's a bit hypocritical that these same women don't work themselves.

I have been a SAHM, I have been a single (widowed) mom, I have also been the sole provider for my family and part of a two income family. I honestly have to say it was easier to provide for my family on two incomes. I am not bitter or jealous of anyone. I just question why it is that so many SAHMs are rude or judgmental towards those on PA. In my opinion it is a case of  "There but for the grace of God go I."

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:45 AM
Replies (531-540):
by Bronze Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 3:53 PM
1 mom liked this

That is a completely unfair statement. It's all about where you are and what options are available. If I were to go back to work right now, I would be stuck with a minimum wage job because in my area it is oil country. Only men get the good paying jobs. Luckily my husband is one of them, without a college education. I, however, do have a degree and years experience but in our area, my field is almost nonexistant during this oil boom. Just so I can put my opinion out there even more....I personally know 2 men that work with my husband that both make over $130k annually, that DID NOT even graduate High School. My best friend that has a BA doesnt even top $50k annually. It's not always the amount of education, but the options available to you!

Quoting CatherineNewton:

What I dont get is why everyone thinks a SHAM can only get a min wage job that just covers child care.... Really did you woman not go to college. I am sure you could get more than just a min wage job... I dont have anything against staying at home what ever but if min wage is all you can amount to go back to school.

by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 3:53 PM
1 mom liked this
i really cant afford it, unless i just want time away from the house. dh and i finally got our first home together and its so far out that the job i did have didnt even cover daycare amd gas. so i decided to stay at home. it saves money believe it or not but i really miss working. where im at pay sucks.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 3:53 PM
1 mom liked this

Some women actually want to raise their children themselves and care more about that than having a lot of "stuff".I don't give a fuck about "keeping up with the Jones's" and could care less what people think about my vehicle or other posessions. Daycare would cost more than I would earn but even if it did not,I would still stay home.I know that I am lucky and single moms don't have a choice-but I do and I stay home.

by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 3:54 PM

And I don't buy the fact that so many people give a fuck about this subject...I mean...c'mon...REALLY!?!??

by Anonymous 96 on Jun. 16, 2012 at 3:54 PM
Our child is special needs. Only a nurse can watch him. We can't afford to pay a nurse to care for our child while we work
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 3:55 PM
not everyone can get a high paying job.. If youre not all schooled up and have all the experience you need youre looking at a shitty ass paying job which will most likely go to just daycare. You're looking at at least 500/mo per child. If you and/or your significant other make too much you cant get state help for daycare. So say you have hubby, 2 kids, and you go get a 30hr a week job (because lets face it.. Most min wage jobs are hiring part time so they dont have to pay out for benefits) making 9/hr... You're barely going to be making a thousand dollars a month... That means most likely youre only making enough to pay for a good chunk of daycare and hubbys (if youre lucky) paycheck has to go for gas and Daycare too. So yeah, you cant afford it if youre barely getting by already.
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by Silver Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 4:06 PM

I have been 100% on my own, no child support, no pa, no nothing.  I pay $475 a month for full time childcare.  My child care provider does pre school in the morning and takes him to gymnastics once a week.  He has learned so much since he started going there in January of this year.  I think it is a matter of shopping around for daycares and not equating weekly cost with the quality of care.  My childcare provider is excellent, she could easily charge upwards of $200 per week, but he doesn't.  I don't make a ton of money, I pay about 1/4 of my take home pay in childcare, but I can still afford to buy him things he needs and wants.  We take mini vacations, I pay for gymnastics lessons etc.  I haven't worked a minimum wage job since 1995, back when it was $4.25 an hour.  It is crazy to me that people who are dealing with nearly twice as much starting can't make it on their own.   

by Anonymous 97 on Jun. 16, 2012 at 4:06 PM

When they're single they're most likely able to qualify for PA which covers some of the bills

by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 4:11 PM

Why do people have children when they only earn minimum wage?  MINIMUM wages are not meant to be lived on - certainly not for a single person, much less a family.  This wage is to help you get started in the work place at a young age and then you get skills, go to college/trade school and increase your earning ability.

THEN you have kids!

by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 4:11 PM

in my case it is  LOT cheaper, and saves a LOT of money for me to stay home, were barely scraping by as it is. Im sure as a single mom i could do it but it would be even harder... 

However i do hope my husband will be comfortable enough to be left home with our newborn for really long periods of time because i would love to work weekends lol i love staying home with my kid, but i need a break and we NEED more money... lol

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