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I don't buy it when a SAHM says her family can't afford for her to work *clarification*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

If your family can't afford for you to work, how in the heck can a single mom afford to do it? I find it hilarious that some of the same women claiming that they can't work are the ones criticizing those on PA. If something happens to your little slice of heaven and you end up a single mom, what are you going to do? Since supposedly you can't afford to work when you have someone else supplying money for housing, food, and etc., how could you do it without them?

My point in posting this was that a lot of the people who are criticizing people on PA are SAHMs. How in the world can a single mom do it by herself without PA? I am not bashing SAHMs, but I think it's a bit hypocritical that these same women don't work themselves.

I have been a SAHM, I have been a single (widowed) mom, I have also been the sole provider for my family and part of a two income family. I honestly have to say it was easier to provide for my family on two incomes. I am not bitter or jealous of anyone. I just question why it is that so many SAHMs are rude or judgmental towards those on PA. In my opinion it is a case of  "There but for the grace of God go I."

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:45 AM
Replies (81-90):
Dzyre1115
by Desiree` on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:09 AM
6 moms liked this

 I see someone has a touch of the green eye!

Quoting Anonymous:

Sahms  have a million excuses not to work....stay lazy you hags

 

TwinmomAlicia
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:09 AM
2 moms liked this
Because you can't live life based in worst-case scenarios. Car wrecks are real. Never drive. Drowning is real. Never swim or go on a boat. And so on. What a sad, pathetic waste o f life if I never did anything because something bad COULD happen.


Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting xomrs.chase:

When daycare takes up the entire paycheck or more...


But why would you have kids if the best you could ever do was to earn minimum wage? Divorce is real. Abandonment is real.  Who makes their kids hostages to marriage?


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Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:09 AM
2 moms liked this
YOU don't have to. Not everyone has the split shift option.

Quoting maddhattermama:

I say this all time. You don't have to put the kids in day care. Hubby works 6-3 or 7-4 sun-thurs. i work 630pm-11pm. never need a sitter or anything like that

Anonymous
by Anonymous 19 on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:10 AM

k.

jonellg
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:10 AM
1 mom liked this

I could work, I don't want to, and I have no problem admitting it.

lowencope
by Platinum Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:11 AM

I know what you mean hun, but you're not going to win this argument.  In this economy, it really takes two incomes to support a family IMO.  Living off of just one income would not work for our family.  Even if one of us did start making enough for one to stay at home, we still wouldn't do it.  We would want improve our lifestyle and put more money away.   There are so many things that come up that kids need and we haven't started saving for college.  idk if we will be able to afford all the things they want/ need, but we are going to keep working and trying to provide them with opportunities to live a quality life.  That takes money.  I can only speak for myself and my family.  I know for a fact before i had a degree or job skills, I could walk into almost any daycare and get a job with half off on childcare.  I didnt make much money, but it was a lot more than zero.  It goes back to the whole where there's a will there's a way.  When you are forced to face trying to make it on your own, you find a way to do it. 

mom2monsterboys
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:13 AM
3 moms liked this
That is a really good option! That is as long as you have a good support system from family/friends. I know I don't. I sometimes envy people with more involved family.

Quoting krtabc:

What about a family member or a friend? A part time job can help cover diapers or help to buy formula or other necessities. If available maybe an aunt or grandparent may be able to help. Even friends could be sought out for this. While you wouldn't be able to pay them you can offer to watch their children in return. It might be good for the SAHM to get out and enjoy the company of other adults. I've seen a lot f posts about how women are sick of staying home and cleaning and cooking. Maybe these can be options to consider. 

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evilangel198431
by Silver Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:13 AM
Single moms usually qualify for help most of the time couples make too much and if the mom is working all she is really doing is paying daycare especially if there is more than one child. We have 4 kids if I were working right now I would have to pay 80 dollars a day in daycare. To afford just that I would have to make over 10 dollars an hour. I make 9 an hr as a nurse aid. So if I went to work my whole check plus some of his would go to daycare. We can't afford it.


Quoting Anonymous:

So how is a single mom supposed to do it?

Quoting purpleducky:

Minimum wage doesn't pay for daycare.



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Anonymous
by Anonymous 20 on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:13 AM
Yeah but in that case you can rely on good Ol uncle Sam to pay for daycare. Food. Medical. Sometimes cash too. If you already have a husband making money enough for you to stay home (even if you're scrimping by) you probably make too much to tap into those benefits.


Quoting Anonymous:

Again, what do you expect a single mom to do? A married mom can at least work out a schedule where her husband watches the kids for a few hours while she works. A single mom doesn't have that luxury.

Quoting xomrs.chase:

When daycare takes up the entire paycheck or more...



BeverlyKaye9878
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 9:14 AM
3 moms liked this
I have been on the waiting list for daycare assistance for over a year now...

It's not as easy as it sounds. You actually have to be employed before they will even put you on the list.


Quoting ma2b08:

PA pays for daycare for them.




Quoting Anonymous:

So how is a single mom supposed to do it?

Quoting purpleducky:

Minimum wage doesn't pay for daycare.




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