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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

the state is STEALING my child support !!!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Im going to try and make this as EASY to understand as possible....

I left DH  Dec 17 2010
I got on TANF Jan 2011.
I was off TANF byJuly 2011 ( so only 6 months of TANF)

During those 6 months of TANF I got $105/mo from the state to live on ( 6x 105= 630.00 )

I got my FIRST cild support check Nov' 2011 ( 11 months after I first applied for child suport assistance)

His monthly child support amount is $848.00 

He is BEHIND $9328.00  ( 11mo x 848.00 )

The state says he owes them $3783.00 for the TANF I used ( even though I didnt use that amount but WHATEVER)

That leaves him oweing ME $5,544.00 in back pay.  ( are we still together ? or is anyone confused? )

I received child support checks from Nov 2011 till May 2012  ( 6 mo) in the amount of $1098.00 ( 848.00 + 250 for the back support)

CURRENTLY he has paid me $1500.00 of that back support leaving the back pay balance at $4,044.0.

Last month I got a check for $1044.... i was confused but being only $54... I didnt cause a fuss...atleast i got something RIGHT ?

I got my check today instead of $1098....it was $848.00.... but the statements they sent ( last month and for this month) say they sent me $1098.00 Even though that wasnt the amount they sent me.


I should be getting $1098.00 until Nov 2013. After that they should drop to $848.00  Thats when his back pay to ME would end.  He would still be paying the state back their $3783.00 for however long that would take.


Im not complaining ... yes it does sound like it but IM NOT.  I am just a bit pissed that they are saying they are sending me a certain amount then not sending it when techinally they should be for another year and a half !!

I am on a tight budget  that $250 they didnt send me... I cant pay my electric bill, Im short on rent and and I have no gas for my car to get to work. ( work full time)

They cut my child care saying I make too much money... they dropped my food stamps ( we eat what the food bank gives us)


Im am beyond stressed off right now....

So the EX says " if you need anything just ask" so I just asked for a little help... he says " get off your lazy ass and get a couple more jobs" 

HIS INCOME IS ROUGHLY $5000/ MO  ( hes military getting reg pay plus his housing allowance and currently deployed getting seperation pay, hazardous pay and flight deck pay)   but he is more worried about paying for his girlfriend and her kid and THEIR unborn kid then the 2 kids he already has. ( she is one of the reasons I left him)  all I asked him was for $250 so that I could get the bills covered.


THEN HE SAYS  " LET ME HAVE THE KIDS FOR A YEAR SO YOU CAN GET ON YOUR FEET"   ... yes because you having the kids for a year means my bills will dramatically drop ( NOT)  and no way in hell am i going to let them stay with him for  a year when he was charged with child abuse by the military ( who later sealed the files so i couldnt use it in court on him... along with the domestic violence charges)



im sorry this is so long.... im upset , struggling,,,,, and have no one to talk to about this right now.


If I sound selfish..... im again really sorry... im not ... i HATE asking for help, I hate having to barrow money.... but Im at the point I wont be able to afford rent soon because everything is getting further and further behind.


* deep breath *    *** cries***


Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 6, 2012 at 2:54 AM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:13 AM
They are in inhome childcare already. Cheapest rate in the County

Quoting Anayiah3:

And don't send ur kids away! All men say that then you will be paying him the new chick and her kids smh... try to find in home childcare. Care.com has nannies inbox me if u like




Quoting Anonymous:

Just go to them with proof of what your saying. Im sure they will fix it and maybe you need to find a cheaper place to live to cut cost because you get a hell of alot more than me $50 monthly sometimes nothing AND work full-time? You definitely should be better off. Point is live within your means and you wont be strapped for cash. Good luck stay strong

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:13 AM
Get creative roommate situation? ? Get less bedrooms give the kids a room u sleep in livingroom. Gotta do what u gotta do for those babies


Quoting Anonymous:

Im in the.cheapest apartment in the area we have no extras



Quoting Anonymous:

Just go to them with proof of what your saying. Im sure they will fix it and maybe you need to find a cheaper place to live to cut cost because you get a hell of alot more than me $50 monthly sometimes nothing AND work full-time? You definitely should be better off. Point is live within your means and you wont be strapped for cash. Good luck stay strong

Livinwith3boys
by on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:14 AM
3 moms liked this

there is not one chance in hell that I believe that...if he was military, he would have lost rank and gotten chaptered, for beating his kids...next

Quoting Anonymous:

He put my oldest.in the.hospital from.beating him...NOT.an option

Quoting Livinwith3boys:

I agree, give the kids to their dad if you can't support them!! Also, what he makse is NONE of your business as long as he is paying child support...ALSO....they can require he pay back medical if you used it (not sure why you would though since the kids obviously have tricare)


Anayiah3
by on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:15 AM
How many kids total? Find a stay at home mom or granny its always cheaper that way.


Quoting Anonymous:

They are in inhome childcare already. Cheapest rate in the County



Quoting Anayiah3:

And don't send ur kids away! All men say that then you will be paying him the new chick and her kids smh... try to find in home childcare. Care.com has nannies inbox me if u like






Quoting Anonymous:

Just go to them with proof of what your saying. Im sure they will fix it and maybe you need to find a cheaper place to live to cut cost because you get a hell of alot more than me $50 monthly sometimes nothing AND work full-time? You definitely should be better off. Point is live within your means and you wont be strapped for cash. Good luck stay strong


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:16 AM
1 mom liked this
We are in a 1 bdrm already ... Cant rent a studio with 3ppl they dont allow it... The wait list for section 8 is 10 1/2 yrs

Quoting Anonymous:

Get creative roommate situation? ? Get less bedrooms give the kids a room u sleep in livingroom. Gotta do what u gotta do for those babies




Quoting Anonymous:

Im in the.cheapest apartment in the area we have no extras





Quoting Anonymous:

Just go to them with proof of what your saying. Im sure they will fix it and maybe you need to find a cheaper place to live to cut cost because you get a hell of alot more than me $50 monthly sometimes nothing AND work full-time? You definitely should be better off. Point is live within your means and you wont be strapped for cash. Good luck stay strong

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:18 AM
I dont care if u dont believe it. There are plenty of ppl who know it is true, including his Co workers who wont have shit to do with him now because of it and they.fought for me

Quoting Livinwith3boys:

there is not one chance in hell that I believe that...if he was military, he would have lost rank and gotten chaptered, for beating his kids...next

Quoting Anonymous:

He put my oldest.in the.hospital from.beating him...NOT.an option



Quoting Livinwith3boys:

I agree, give the kids to their dad if you can't support them!! Also, what he makse is NONE of your business as long as he is paying child support...ALSO....they can require he pay back medical if you used it (not sure why you would though since the kids obviously have tricare)


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:19 AM
1 mom liked this
Well like pp said send them with dad or consider moving somewhere else cheaper ....... your getting alot of money from dad already so he probably can't do much more. Find income based apartments i donno im tapped out of ideas


Quoting Anonymous:

We are in a 1 bdrm already ... Cant rent a studio with 3ppl they dont allow it... The wait list for section 8 is 10 1/2 yrs



Quoting Anonymous:

Get creative roommate situation? ? Get less bedrooms give the kids a room u sleep in livingroom. Gotta do what u gotta do for those babies






Quoting Anonymous:

Im in the.cheapest apartment in the area we have no extras







Quoting Anonymous:

Just go to them with proof of what your saying. Im sure they will fix it and maybe you need to find a cheaper place to live to cut cost because you get a hell of alot more than me $50 monthly sometimes nothing AND work full-time? You definitely should be better off. Point is live within your means and you wont be strapped for cash. Good luck stay strong


Livinwith3boys
by on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:20 AM
1 mom liked this

RRIIIIIGGHHHTTT have fun with that anon...I hope for your kid's sake you are just crying for attention and they are actually being taken care of...

Quoting Anonymous:

I dont care if u dont believe it. There are plenty of ppl who know it is true, including his Co workers who wont have shit to do with him now because of it and they.fought for me

Quoting Livinwith3boys:

there is not one chance in hell that I believe that...if he was military, he would have lost rank and gotten chaptered, for beating his kids...next

Quoting Anonymous:

He put my oldest.in the.hospital from.beating him...NOT.an option



Quoting Livinwith3boys:

I agree, give the kids to their dad if you can't support them!! Also, what he makse is NONE of your business as long as he is paying child support...ALSO....they can require he pay back medical if you used it (not sure why you would though since the kids obviously have tricare)



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:23 AM
2 moms liked this
You wouldn't believe a lot of what.the.military hides.

Quoting Livinwith3boys:

RRIIIIIGGHHHTTT have fun with that anon...I hope for your kid's sake you are just crying for attention and they are actually being taken care of...

Quoting Anonymous:

I dont care if u dont believe it. There are plenty of ppl who know it is true, including his Co workers who wont have shit to do with him now because of it and they.fought for me



Quoting Livinwith3boys:

there is not one chance in hell that I believe that...if he was military, he would have lost rank and gotten chaptered, for beating his kids...next

Quoting Anonymous:

He put my oldest.in the.hospital from.beating him...NOT.an option





Quoting Livinwith3boys:

I agree, give the kids to their dad if you can't support them!! Also, what he makse is NONE of your business as long as he is paying child support...ALSO....they can require he pay back medical if you used it (not sure why you would though since the kids obviously have tricare)



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 6, 2012 at 3:25 AM
Hiw would.i.do that? You have to have 1st and last.mo.rent plus deposit.... Plus money to actually.move items...and Im in the cheapest area already...unless i.move out of state, but cant because he will.file kid napping charges

Quoting Anonymous:

Well like pp said send them with dad or consider moving somewhere else cheaper ....... your getting alot of money from dad already so he probably can't do much more. Find income based apartments i donno im tapped out of ideas




Quoting Anonymous:

We are in a 1 bdrm already ... Cant rent a studio with 3ppl they dont allow it... The wait list for section 8 is 10 1/2 yrs





Quoting Anonymous:

Get creative roommate situation? ? Get less bedrooms give the kids a room u sleep in livingroom. Gotta do what u gotta do for those babies








Quoting Anonymous:

Im in the.cheapest apartment in the area we have no extras









Quoting Anonymous:

Just go to them with proof of what your saying. Im sure they will fix it and maybe you need to find a cheaper place to live to cut cost because you get a hell of alot more than me $50 monthly sometimes nothing AND work full-time? You definitely should be better off. Point is live within your means and you wont be strapped for cash. Good luck stay strong


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