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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

when to call it quits?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 12 Replies

been together for 5 years.... i have a 7 year old... i'm not happy. we tried to do date nights when we both had jobs/money.. but now, we lack money/jobs (he's jobless, my job isnt bringing in much money anymore)- we havent had a 'date night' since the beginning of June- although we are together 24/7 (i work from home).. idk if i love him anymore... yea- this is a slight spin off.. on that post, it says its not a reason for divorce.. but what about a reason to break up? 5 years is a LONG time. pretty sure we would've already been married if he felt he was the "big man" by bringing in all the money- and i didnt have such issues with marriage (i dont want to get married)

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ajohnson08099
by *Lyssa Lou* on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:21 PM

 ... Well... Besides for this date night... What else have you two done to rekindle the romance? Is he depressed because of the lack of a job? I would never push a split up at a highly stressful time really, because it may just be everything weighing on you that you can't focus on what you DO love about your SO.

Make a date night at home, do something simple.. Go to the park, go to the lake (if there is one around) something.

nikki32230
by on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:24 PM
Marriage is a whole different animal than dating, if you are dating this guy and you're not happy, you don't want to date him anymore then dump him, no biggie. You didnt make that commitment. It's plenty of reason to break up.
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TallChic
by Stacey on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:25 PM

Have you talked to him about it? If you want it to work you both have to work on it

                              
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21lisa72
by on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:26 PM

 Why isnt he working?  First maybe try counceling but if you really want to divorce get his lazy but a jobbefore you divorce him or you just may have to support him and you dont want to have to do that because it is just ridiculas to pay a grown lazy man support.  So take it slow, hide some money and make im work no matter what it is than  serve him.  Oh in the meantime just meet with a lawyer to see where you are at.  You dont have to stay in a love less marriage for the sake of children, they are to smart for that.

Pnukey
by Jenn on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:28 PM


Quoting nikki32230:

Marriage is a whole different animal than dating, if you are dating this guy and you're not happy, you don't want to date him anymore then dump him, no biggie. You didnt make that commitment. It's plenty of reason to break up.

I agree. Dating is totally temporary. It either leads to marriage or it ends. If he's not the one for you, and it sounds like not even the father of your kid, move on.

mommy_me
by ~The Three B's~ on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:28 PM

 BUMP

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:30 PM

you don't need money for a date night. take a bath together, watch a movie at home (red box is a dollar) make something cheep and easy from the store like Roman noodles and bread sticks, eat at the table together and talk. turn on the radio and have a conversation. have a naked slumber party in the living room when DD is asleep.

there are so many things a couple can do for date night that requires no money. and if you want to go out save 5 dollars from each paycheck and at the end of each month go out for dinner or a movie or whatever you guys like to do.

is it just date night that is not making the realationship worth it right now? not having money can be stressful,

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:41 PM

he got laid off. he has a job lined up though- waiting for the training class to start. his new job is $9/hr- which is a $3 paycut, but its something... either way, i know if needed, i can always afford things on my own- from my own income and my own savings.

we arent married, but idk if 'breaking up' is the right thing to do

Quoting 21lisa72:

 Why isnt he working?  First maybe try counceling but if you really want to divorce get his lazy but a jobbefore you divorce him or you just may have to support him and you dont want to have to do that because it is just ridiculas to pay a grown lazy man support.  So take it slow, hide some money and make im work no matter what it is than  serve him.  Oh in the meantime just meet with a lawyer to see where you are at.  You dont have to stay in a love less marriage for the sake of children, they are to smart for that.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:43 PM

i havent talked about this to him yet... main reason is b/c i dont know if *I* want it to work... i want to figure that out first, so at least i know where i stand on it... if its fixable on my side, or if i'm just done and he wont be able to do anything to change my mind

Quoting TallChic:

Have you talked to him about it? If you want it to work you both have to work on it


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 22, 2012 at 3:44 PM
It s funny when u don't have any real issues...Why not be a bit patient and see where hings go?? I haven't had a date night since I was married lol....
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