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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Submissive wives and their kids?

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I've wondered this for a while, but thought it might be an offensive question or maybe just plain stupid. I'm bored tonight, so I figured I would go ahead and ask...

How exactly are you raising your children? I mean, do the boys have to do chores? Do the girls do more work around the house? I originally thought of this after I had read a submissive wife post and was getting ready to vacuum. I told ds to clean up his floor and vacuum his room too when I was done. It made me wonder if little boys in your families are responsible for their own regular chores or if you expect them to grow up and marry a woman like yourself so they wouldn't need to bother with these things. Or if you tell your daughters that they can grow up and be a doctor or a lawyer and support themselves or if they think a woman should be at home, taking care of the house, husband and children.

Obviously, I don't know much about this lifestyle, so I'm not assuming anything, I'm just curious...

by on Jul. 25, 2012 at 8:41 PM
Replies (31-40):
anime.princess
by on Jul. 25, 2012 at 9:47 PM

Yes, everyone (both boys and girls) must do chores.   You want to raise self sufficient boys, right? I can't wait for my baby boy to get a bit older so he can help me with the dishes and with the laundry!

Beautiful31mom
by on Jul. 25, 2012 at 9:58 PM


Quoting cherryblosso883:

are you talking about doormat submisive?

there is a difference between a doormat and a submissive wife. Can a Submissive wife be a doormat? Sure, but, a non-submissive wife can also be a doormat. 

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 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.There is no commandment greater than these.-Mark 12:30-31

MamaRae85
by *you're on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:04 PM
1 mom liked this

I have a son. He'll learn cooking and cleaning so he'll be able to take care of himself and help his wife with the physical needs of the family. I'm actually teaching my husband how to cook too! =) I feel, and so does he, that it's important for him and our son to know how to do these things; they're basic human needs.He'll be taught that he needs to do the best he can as a husband and father to take care of his family and be able to "take control" when his wife can't or won't help with decisions.

If we ever have a daughter, she'll be encouraged to get an education just like our son(s) will be. She'll be taught how to change a tire and whatever else we feel is necessary "boys work" for all of our kids to learn. We do believe that it's IDEAL for the mom to stay home, but that it works for some families not to have that, and for other families it's not possible. She'll be taught that she is the "helper" for her husband and that it's okay for him to make a decision if she doesn't feel like she can/should help make that decision. BUT they should make decisions together.

The two most important things that we will teach our children about submissiveness:

1. From the Bible- A woman is supposed to submit to her husband, but her husband is supposed to "lay down his life for his wife", which is part of his own submissiveness to her. We would never teach them that God condones any disrespect from either spouse ever.

2. From "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" (seriously, this is something my husband and I say all the time!)- "The husband is the head of the family. But the woman? She is the neck, and she can turn the head any way she wants." Both spouses have some power over the other. The idea is to not abuse it. =)

MrsWhite101610
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by Gold Member on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:12 PM
1 mom liked this
I only have a dd right now. She helps with household chores but she thinks they're fun. She cleans her room and whatever I ask her to help with. She's 2.5. I'd expect the same if I had a ds. I'm also fine with her doing whatever she wants when she's older but I'm secretly hoping she'll be the first female president lol
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Joels-My-Love
by on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:12 PM
Yes it will.

Quoting teeloffel:


Quoting Joels-My-Love:

I teach my girls to.be mommies and wives :-)

Oh, great. I'm sure that will serve them well in the real world... throwing up

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lapcounter
by Queen Mom on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:15 PM
I am a submissive wife but I am not teaching my girl's too be, it is a choice they need to make on their own. I would imagine they would be but who knows but they do have chores around the house to.do :)
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cherryblosso883
by on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:16 PM

I do not know what catagory I fall into,but I am teaching my son to pick up after himself and that mommy is not a slave.Basucally if you make a mess pick it up!

Quoting Beautiful31mom:


Quoting cherryblosso883:

are you talking about doormat submisive?

there is a difference between a doormat and a submissive wife. Can a Submissive wife be a doormat? Sure, but, a non-submissive wife can also be a doormat. 



Bigmetalchicken
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:18 PM

My son does chores. When our daughter is old enough, she will have them too.  My son will be raised knowing how to cook, clean, sew, and iron. So will his sister.  Both of my kids will be told that they MUST work hard in school, and become successful in their own right, and be completely responsible for themselves, because no one else will take care of them as adults.

We will both tell our daughter that she can be anything she wants to be, so long as she works hard and applies her self.  Just as we tell our son.

I chose this lifestyle. It was not something I was raised in, and honestly, I feel a little sad for women that are in this sort of relationship only because it is what they were raised knowing, and never being told they could have different.  I do not not believe that this is for everyone, and I would never, ever raise my children to think that this is the only way to live.  I want them to live the life that is best for them. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:22 PM
I am a submissive wife. Not a slave. My husband is the head of our household. He still does chores, inside and outside. That burden does not fall completely on me. Everyone in our home is responsible for its upkeep.

Our sons are being raised to be leaders. Our daughter is being raised to be submissive to the head of her household.

People have a skewed view of submissives. I am not a doormat, maid, chauffeur, cook, butler, or nanny. I am a wife and a mother. My opinion matters. My dh always considers my opinion, even though his is the final say. And that's fine. I married a man who has The best interest of his family in the forefront always. I am treated like a princess.I get and do whatever I want (within reason) I've been told that a bath has been made for me and to go relax while dh cleans up the dishes. My dh helps to hold me accountable for everything. I wish more people understood the difference in a submissive wife and a slave.
lovinglife0682
by on Jul. 25, 2012 at 10:23 PM
This is not our definition of a submissive marriage.
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