I had three nights in a row of very little sleep, and I was in bed saturday night, when my friend called, in tears, and asked me to come over and help her cook tomorrow. She had called me several times this week asking to hang out because she's been struggling with depression over something her and I can both relate to. So I had some long nights trying to be there for her, for several days prior to this.
Anyway, so even though I knew I had to get up early for some family stuff that day, and I hadn't slept very well for the three days prior, I was getting a migraine and I was utterly exhausted, I told her i'd come over and help her. She was in tears because she's not a cook, and wanted everything to be just right.(we had book club that night).
So essentially I did all the hard work, all the ACTUAL cooking, and she just mixed things. All she did was stick it in the oven, then pull it out when it was done. That's it.
Never ONCE did she say anything about my help. Never once did she acknowledge my hard work. She took 100% full credit for everything- even the centerpeice that I had quickly thrown together and the platters that were so artfully arranged (this is what I do. I'm HUGE into hosting and having guests over. It's something I'm really good at and I take pride in my abilities!). She was showered with compliments all night long and NEVER told anyone I helped. She didn't even thank me at the end of the night. I was beat up, tired, totally wiped out exhausted... and she KNEW that, and couldn't even be bothered to say thanks.
It would have been nice to have her show some humility.... she didn't mention that she never picked up a knife, turned on the oven, or did anything more than mix up the ingredients I had already prepared for her.
I feel like she really used me. Today she posted pics of all her stuff and said "look what I made last night!" and got dozens of comments on FB saying she was awesome and did a great job and etc etc etc...and I'm like "dude, you didn't DO any of that! I did!" But not a single "thank you" or any credit given.
I guess I didn't DO it for the credit. I did it because I wanted to be there for my friend... but it sucks when you spend an entire day in your friends kitchen and she can't even say thank you. ... which I guess makes me shallow because I would have liked to be recognized amongst our friends for my work.
No, not shallow.
Hurt and disappointed.
Totally understandable.
These are the kinds of people that I call "former friends".
You're not shallow , I have a friend like that and I know the feeling, but after a couple of times taking all the credit I just would butt in and say something like " OMG did you taste my delicious dip yet?, did you like the way I decorated the cupcakes" stuff like that so people would give me the credit I deserve instead of looking like an idiot....
Not shallow at all! I believe credit should be given where credit is due. She DEFINITELY should have acknowledged your efforts. I don't know if I would want to be friends with somebody like that, sounds like the "give and take" in that relationship is all "give" on your end, and all "take" on hers...
At what age should I tell my son dh is not his bio dad?
Would you prostitute yourself before you would put your kids to bed hungry?
- livn4hevn
on Aug. 6, 2012 at 1:36 PM